Is preschool important for a shy child?

Question

I know it's not a must & I normally wouldnt be so concerned but my son is so shy and slower to adjust to new situations. I am a stay at home mom, (which I love) My son will go to kindergarten next year. He is doing great and is ahead with academics but Im worried about him just getting used to the idea of doing this by himself. Kindergarten is next year for him. I had him in preschool 3 mornings per wk but took him out b/c I was unhappy with the preschool, now Im having trouble finding a place for him close by. I am considering not putting him in preschool at all but Im really concerned. We go to playgroups, library, etc and he is fine but Im with him. Some are telling me he will do just fine once he adjusts to kindergarten and that in another year, he will just be that much more mature , others are telling me it is important for him to go this year so he will be used to being away from me and the whole school setting by next year. Anyone have a similar situation they could share?

He is around other kids 2-3 days per wk at the library, at playgroups and field trips with the playgroup. . I am with him, though and that's my concern. The only thing he does without me is sunday school.
Thanks

Answer 1

I know how you must feel.
I have 2 boys, one started preschool this year and the eldest started kindergarten. The youngest was 3.5 when he started preschool and 9 months in he still asks me not to send him. But as soon as I leave he loves the work and he thrives on the contact with new friends and telling me all about the activities he gets up to during the day. Both my boys were the same and I am also a stay at home parent. The confidence does come for them as they were both clingy and shy children. The eldest took straight to kindergarten after preschool and loved it!!!
I would suggest taking him to preschool and even though it will be very hard to see them upset you are doing the right thing for their confidence and self esteem.
My preschool liked to encourage us to pick the children up early at the start and extend the time each week. Which worked better for my kids. They can start off just going for a few hours and then after a few weeks you can make it after lunch and eventually the full day. My son after 9 months still gets dropped off at 9am and I must pick him up at 2:30pm before the other children and before I pick up the eldest. I hope this helps, but please realise it is very important for him to go and start to establish that self confidence that he needs....

Answer 2

I think preschool is very important for a shy child. I think it is important for all children actually but especially for the shy. I've seen first hand the effects of preschool on a bashful child. Most of the time children are shy because they are not used to being around a lot of other people outside of their family and are overwhelmed by people that they do not know. By placing them in preschool it gets them away from their normal environment (their comfort zone) and allows them to adjust to being around new and different people. I think that waiting until kindergarten is a bad idea because this could harm your childs educational experience. If your son goes into kindergarten as a shy child that is one more obstacle for the school to have to face and if it takes a while for him to get over his shyness he could fall behind all of the other children or worse his shyness could hinder him in a way that he never stands out in class and the teachers think he is too immature and in either of those situations he could eventually get held back simply because he had more to learn as a kindergarten student and isnt at the same level as the other students which is something most parents never want their children to go through.
On the note of not being able to find a good preschool- maybe it is not so much finding a preschool but finding a small licensed childcare provider that does a lot of interaction with the kids. I would suggest looking in your area to see who all has home childcare and I realize there is a lot of negativity towards some home childcare places but check around on their reputation, go visit the place before you decide anything, it is pretty easy to determine if the place would be good or bad for your child.

Answer 3

I think it is important for him to be involved in some activity that you are not in. The town I live in has a pre-k program but they only allow children w/ "special needs" to take part in it until they are 4 so they have to be tested first. They normally look for children w/ learning disibilities or something like that but I had my daughter tested because she was so shy (she used to cry when she met new people). They said brain function wise she was too far ahead of the class but socially she needed it so they accepted her. It did wonders for her! If you cant find a program that you are happy w/ nearby I would suggest maybe a daycare center 2-3 days a week that way you can drop him off and he could start to bond without your pressence. I know daycare can be expensive even just a few days a week so maybe if you have a gym membership you can take him to the childrens playroom while you workout (I know the YMCA has a nursery type room w/ an adult present and your child can stay there for up to 2 hours at a time) and you could get in a few laps or sit in the sauna or somthing a few days a week while your child interacted w/ other children.

Answer 4

I agree with Heather, I think pre-school is important for all children. Not just from the academics standpoint, but learning how to socialize and interact with other children without having mommy and daddy around to supervise. I'm also a big fan of weaning. Going to Kindergarten 5 days a week after staying home 7 days a week will be an adjustment. Perhaps easier on him and you since you're a stay at home mom, to let him go 2 to 3 times a week for half days.

Answer 5

Send him to preschool or start arranging playdates and playgroups that you can drop him off at. Or, see if there's a well-reputable in home provider in your area that you could drop him off at just for socialization. You could always look into a daycare center a couple of mornings each week--they should all have a preschool curriculum and should allow you to bring him just a few days a week. I'd look into one of those options because once he hits kindergarten, he's going to be shocked beyond belief. He needs to get used to being away from you or he's going to have difficulties adjusting socially next year, which will hinder his academics.

Answer 6

I think preschool is good for any kid that will be going to school. They need the stimulation from being around other children and not just around mom or dad all the time. Even if you put him in 1 or 2 days a week, he will be more secure when he has to make the big jump into regular school 5 days a week.

Answer 7

Preschool is costly and maximum of them at the instant are not something better than a daycare(i've got seen them). Kindergarten is while she will meet acquaintances and be social. i did no longer pass to preschool and had no hardship making acquaintances or discovering and that i proceed to make A's and B's. I already knew my ABC's and 123's and colours basically from being a curious little infant. Preschool is not sensible relatively considering which you are able to stay at living house and watch her. enable her be a infant in the previous going to college.

Answer 8

personally having 2 sons (one is almost 4 and one just turned 15) i put both my sons in preschool, it is great for them to learn some independence, and it helps get them ready for kindergarten! as long as it is a good one, i bet you will see a big difference in him once he started going as far as confidence and social interaction with others!

Answer 9

i think since your child is soo shy and has a hard time adjusting you need to put in back into preschool, it will help him with social situations

i am learning this the hard way my son is in pre k 4 and is struggling because hes shy and timid put him in school it will help him