I'm gay but I was baptised a Christian about a month ago. The problem now is that I've started masturbating and the pleasure and feeling of orgasm is so good I am doing it few times each week. I also have desires to see my good looking athlete male friends naked and peeked at a few friends showering on a few occasions.
It is very difficult because I'm also a Christian and God has commanded me a life of holiness. I think my heart has been so hardened I've no remorse for these sins.
I feel so frustrated, depressed and angry as I feel like a failure. Man I'm so screwed. People treat me like an outcast. My church doesn't know I'm gay except one person there. I'm also afraid of athletic guys and I find it difficult to relate to them.
PS: Please, no condemnations or anything. I really need help. I feel ostracised by society and few of my Christian friends knew my secret.
2007-09-16 20:57:20 · 27 answers · asked by Anonymous in Society & Culture ➔ Religion & Spirituality
John 5:24
Verily, verily, I say unto you, He that heareth my word, and believeth on him that sent me, hath everlasting life, and shall not come into condemnation; but is passed from death unto life.
The Imposter Paul, on the other hand, had many peculiar opinions while writing to specific churches about specific problems they were having.
First of all, I suggest you find a church in your area that embraces same gender relationships. There is absolutely NO reason you must always attend the church where you "found God."
2. The "hardened heart doctrine" of homosexuality is false. Many churches teach that homosexuality is caused by rejection of God and His principles. Thus the heart is hardened and all manner of debauchery is the brought about. It is suggested that homosexuality is actually the PUNISHMENT for rejecting the Judeo/Christian faith. None of that is true. How do I know? In my youth, I had PERFECT faith in Christ. I never knew anything else. No other options were ever offered to me. Yet, I struggled, as you are, with these same issues. I was tortured by this. Until I came to really understand Jesus.
I want you to consider something... You are in the anguish you are in because you view your sexual orientation as the source of your "sinful nature."
The way I see what you are describing is that you don't have a gay problem, you have a lust problem. When you reduce people to sexual objects... or visions for your mastubatory fantasies, that is when you "sin."
Masturbation is not wrong... it is, in fact, healthy. What you think about while doing so can be both wrong and unhealthy.
If you choose to continue associating with a denomination of christian who condemns same gender relationships, you will go insane. However, I suggest you spend some time reading the things Jesus said. He is, after all, the Savior himself... and said a lot of things. Focus on those. Everything else is fluff. Unless you want to put the words of every other character in the bible above the words of Jesus. If you choose to worship Jesus, know the things he said. Hide those words in your heart... live by them.
Don't let anybody tell you Jesus said something Jesus didn't say.
I
2007-09-16 21:36:31 · answer #1 · answered by Dustin Lochart 6 · 3⤊ 3⤋
First-personally if I were in your shoes I would ask those trusted Christian friends to pray for you by standing in the gap.
Second- I would fast and pray and ask God to help you with this struggle that you are facing. Fasting can break all kinds of bondages. You could always call a ministry and ask to speak with a man who would be able to relate to your issues.
Do you not feel comfortable talking to the pastor? You could also check in your community for some Christian counseling. This man needs prayer not a lecture from other Christians!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
I suppose the ones who call themselves followers of Christ have never struggled with sexuality? We all have.
I would not rely on the opinions of strangers on the internet to help with a problem as personal as this. You will get kinds of answers that may make you end up feeling more confused or frustrated.
Good luck.
2007-09-23 18:19:15 · answer #2 · answered by lablover2 2 · 2⤊ 0⤋
I agree with Pastor John. I would add this however... !st Corinthians 7:36 (I think) talks about if they are ENGAGED and INTEND to marry, it would be alright. They do not sin according to this chapter/verse. But if their intention is NOT to marry, then yes, they are wrong. I dont believe in disfellowship. It would have to be a looooong series of counseling them and praying with them and trying everything under the sun to get them to marry. If all else fails I would still not support the congregation in giving them a timeline or ultimatum. And if the church disfellowshipped them, I would find a new place to worship! It's kind of extreme in my opinion. I would do everything in my power to prevent it, but your right, it does say that in the Bible. So if it was an overwhelming vote and the congregation decided to disfellowship them, then so be it. I still wouldnt support it but would understand the churches position. They would have been given ample opportunity and tons of support. Like the above poster said, what would Jesus do?
2016-05-21 08:30:48 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
God may want you to be holy, but He doesn't want you to be celibate. That's only a requirement that self-righteous heterosexual mortals would impose on you because they're clueless as to what it means and feels like to be gay, straight males writing all the rules to only fit their own lifestyle. God knows what is in your heart and what forces are at work within the body that He gave you.
If your particular church can't accept you the way God made you, then it's not the church for you (as well as not actually representing Christ's teachings). There are other churches, and congregations, that will appreciate your gifts and your love. You can be Christian and gay and not have to live in misery. No rational god would make such a requirement and then expect someone to worship him.
Cheer up, God loves you and me just exactly the way we are, I'm sure of it. Our being gay is precisely part of God's plan, not contrary to it.
2007-09-17 09:52:10 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 3⤋
The thing is to call yourself a Christian means that you have to live a life according to Gods word and to be a Christian it means to be as Christ. Jesus wasn't gay and if you really want to live a life pleasing to God I suggest prey to God to remove anything that is not like him out of you. If your serious about this also i would suggest that you stop masterbating because the more do that the more you began thinking about pre marital sex. Which is against God be it man or a women. I believe that homosexuality is evil spirit from the devil and any spirit can be removed by Gods power. Just continue to prey and I will prey for you. Have a blessed day and be strong in your walk with Christ.
2007-09-17 00:54:00 · answer #5 · answered by Reshonda P 4 · 1⤊ 2⤋
If you haven't repented of your homosexuality, then you are not a saved Christian. You must be Born Again. If you are Born Again, then Jesus will give you a new heart, and you will not desire the lust of the flesh anymore. You will no longer be gay. Many gays have repented, and have been saved by the grace of our wonderful Lord, who is forgiving, and loving. He loves you, and wants you to have eternal life with Him. But, you MUST repent of your homosexual sins, just like you must repent of all your other sins. If someone tells you it is ok to be gay, they are wrong. You have been misled. But, the good news is you still can be saved! Please talk to a pastor about this, because, like you said no one knows it, but you are wrong. The one who matters knows it. Jesus. He knows your heart, and He is knocking at the door right now. Please get on your knees where you are and repent. He will take you in His loving arms. I can tell you are really tormented by this, or you wouldn't have asked for help. I will pray for you. All of us struggle with some kind of sin or another. Homosexuality is no different than any other sin. I love you, and I don't even know you. Please don't believe the people who say Christians hate gays. No. We don't. We do, however hate the sin you're in, just like we hate other sins. It is a wedge between you and God. What is more important to you? Physical pleasure that lasts only a moment? or your eternal soul, and where it's headed? You must get your mind off of your physical pleasures, and onto something good and holy. Please read Phillipians 4:8. Memorize this verse, and everytime you have a bad thought, repeat the verse over and over again. Pray to your Father in Heaven. He will hear you. I will be praying for you. God Bless!
2007-09-24 16:17:08 · answer #6 · answered by byHisgrace 7 · 0⤊ 3⤋
I'm sorry. It must really hurt to be a gay homophobic. I believe with all my heart that our Mother/Father loves us all so much that we can't get our mind completely around it. I know you did not choose to be gay. Why would you when it is so painful for you? I don't believe, (and I may be wrong), that Christ never said anything at all against gay people. His two most important commandment were stated as: To love the Lord your God with all your heart with all your soul, and with all your might. The second is like the first as it says: You must love your neighbor as you love yourself. Part of what this tells me is that I MUST love me. So get going and love and accept yourself as you are, I know God does. Who are you to change his/her commandment? Please e-mail me if you need to share, my e-mail is: msspelled@hotmail.com. And stop beating yourself up, I know god didn't want that for us. I also have other information I believe in which I would like to share with you so please do contact me. I've been studying religion for 35 years now, and I think I can help. Although I wanted to be a minister, and can't, I still would like to tell you a little about what I've learned.
Blessed be, and may peace be with you
2007-09-24 01:40:13 · answer #7 · answered by Linda B 6 · 1⤊ 2⤋
There is no need to feel alone. There are plenty of gay people that have left the lifestyle and have dealt with the same problems confronting you now.
There are several Christian organizations that help people who are trying to leave the life and live for Christ. A few are Exodus International, Love in Action, and New Hope Ministries. Also, read the testimony of Frank Worthen who left the lifestyle at 44 after he became a Christian and founded Exodus International to help other Christians who were struggling with homosexuality. Also, try looking up NARTH on the Internet. All these resources could be very helpful for you now that you are still struggling with your old desires. And don't forget the greatest resource of all--Jesus Christ!! He is there to help you night and day.
I pray for your success and peace!!!
2007-09-16 21:19:55 · answer #8 · answered by Ellen J 7 · 5⤊ 4⤋
You're gay or bisexual. That is natural. Congratulations for not having remorse for self-pleasuring. There is nothing wrong with that.
There are gay Christians at this forum, both the celibate and non-celibate ones. Most of them are non-celibate, but both the celibate ones and the non-celibate ones treat each other with respect and courtesy. It may be a good online community for you:
Gay Christian Forum:
http://gaychristian.net/community/index.php?
Side B (celibate gay Christians):
http://www.gaychristian.net/sideb.php
Go with God.
2007-09-16 21:37:59 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 3⤋
You asked this question to be answered in a Christians perspective. You know what the bible teaches about homosexuality and that is why you are feeling like"an outcast." But I want you to know that God is nearer to you now than ever. He loves you and does not want you to feel this way(depressed/angry/confused). If you know you are gay, and you dont plan on changing your lifestyle, you can still go to church! Guess what? Church is for SINNERS! We are ALL sinners! And the Bible teaches no sin is greater than another. I like to tell the story of a minister who once said "There are no Saints and Sinners. There are just sinners who know and love God, and Sinners who havent found that peace yet." No one can judge you for your feelings and desires. God loves you and you are His child. Dont be angry, depressed, or frustrated. Try to learn why you have the feelings you do. Is this just your natural compulsion to be with men, or has there been some kind of event in your past that has led you to this point? Above all else just know that God loves you and will never turn His back on you, so please try to forgive those Christians who judge you. Stay close to God and trust that He has a plan for you. :)
2007-09-16 21:30:36 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 5⤋