Should I phone them and ask them if they're coming or not? Or should I think that they don't want to come? (I think it's such bad manners not to reply!)
2007-09-16 19:04:28 · 15 answers · asked by Sophia 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Weddings
yes, not replying to an RSVP = ill mannered.
for your peace of mind... and the sake of reception planning... call the people who did not reply.
have a wonderful wedding!
2007-09-16 19:14:06 · answer #1 · answered by Cassor 5 · 5⤊ 0⤋
I agree that it's bad manners not to reply when there's an RSVP request in the invite! However, not everyone agrees with us (or remembers to send the RSVP) so this is bound to happen!
Please call them and ask if they're coming. No reply doesn't necessarily mean they aren't attending. My friend told me that her cousin assumed no RSVP meant no attendance, and ended up having about 20 people at her wedding that she didn't expect would be there! She didn't have enough seating, let alone food, but what can you do? You can't really turn them away at the door.
So just give a call and ask if they got your invite and if they'd be able to attend. Good luck!
2007-09-17 00:34:48 · answer #2 · answered by tink 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Oh, it is bad manners not to reply!!!!
But, you cannot assume that they are not coming just because they don't reply. Very few people realise how important it is to reply!
Definitely call them! Give them a week after the reply date you printed & then start making calls. Be nice , though!
Say this:
"Hi Mary! Just wanted to see if you received my wedding invite? Since I hadn't heard from you I was afraid it got lost in the mail & the caterer is really on our backs to get them a head count! So, can you come?".
2007-09-17 04:33:48 · answer #3 · answered by valschmal 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yes, of course you should phone them. Your "excuse" is that that their response must have become lost in the mail. (None of your friends or relatives would be so unmannerly as to not respond, of course!) Tell them that you wanted to double check before placing their names on the "no" list.
It doesn't hurt to call the people who DID respond too. That way you can be absolutely sure that the "3" they wrote on the response card means Dave & Sue & their colllege age daughter -- not Dave & Sue and their two younger children and thier daughter and her boyfried. These phone calls also give guests a chance to ask "What sort of gifts would they like?" There is no polite way to tell people what to bring unless they ask, so this is a golden moment.
Every call need not be personally made by the bride; you may delegate friends and relatives to help out.
To other readers: I hope you are learning from this that those too cute little RSVP don't work nearly as well as your printer says they will. He is trying to sell you something, something that you are probably better off without. Think of not only the cost printing the things, but of putting postage on them.
2007-09-17 00:26:59 · answer #4 · answered by kill_yr_television 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yes, definitely call them. They could have totally forgotten to make it out and send it. You also have to check to see if they even got the invite in the first place...maybe the address got messed up or it is lost in mail outer space. They could have even mailed the response and it got lost on it's way to you.
Even with those aside, they may just assume they can show up disregarding the RSVP all together. My extended family come from a town where using RSVP response cards are unheard of, you just show up.
I am awaiting the rest of my responses now and will have to make calls. I am so annoyed that a lot of people are not sending them back, especially since we paid for those response cards, along with the fact that we stamped them for people so they wouldn't have to pay to send them. But, as I have learned from this wedding process, nothing turns out how you originally planned it.
Good luck!
2007-09-16 21:20:26 · answer #5 · answered by Claret 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Call them only because invites get lost, some of my relatives didn't reply because they know that I know that they're coming but i would still like to have the reply. Just call, if no one answers, leave a message with your number and let it at that. You don't want to seem like you're "stalking" them so one call should suffice. You've then done your "duty" and if they don't call you back, then assume that they're not coming.
I marry my sweetie October 20 07.....woooohoooo
2007-09-17 00:47:31 · answer #6 · answered by mom to be 6/27/09 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Don't assume they aren't coming and don't assume they are rude. We had people who's invitation never got to them, and others who said they weren't coming then showed up anyway.
Wedding guests are very annoying when it comes to planning. Calling or emailing is the best way to figure it all out. And count on having several no-shows as well.
2007-09-17 03:41:17 · answer #7 · answered by CSL503 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Follow up with a phone call and let them know you need an RSVP. Yes, it's rude not to reply, but maybe they forgot because they were busy.
2007-09-16 21:32:46 · answer #8 · answered by MissRoyalT 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I agree, It's very bad manners not to reply. Yes, call them, it's perfectly acceptable. Just tell them you need an exact headcount for the reception and need to know if they are going to attend. The wedding planning website I used had on their list of things to do to call anyone who hasn't RSVP'd. Don't just assume they aren't coming, just give them a call.
Congrats on your upcoming nuptials.
2007-09-16 19:13:14 · answer #9 · answered by Proud to be 59 7 · 7⤊ 0⤋
You should call them up and ask them. The RSVP may have been lost in the mail and if they said yes they'd show up and be out a seat.
2007-09-17 06:01:25 · answer #10 · answered by Terri 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋