he was in prison for 3 years i have needs right? plus he told me it was cool. but see the guy i did it with he knows and does not care for. honset answers please
2007-09-16 16:29:55 · 19 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
I have a list of things that are deal breakers for me when it comes to deciding whether I'll date someone or not and being a felon is my number one deal breaker. He deserves some one better then you. And most guys don't usually get to interested in women who are in love with a dude's whos in prison, they just know they can play on the "you have needs too" and play that up big time. And you admit it was with someone he knows and doesn't care for. Wow, nothing says I love you then ***** some dude you're "bf" doesn't like. I have no idea, nor do I care, what your felon did. The fact is he's a felon and to me that signifies you have low self esteem and have issues with face to face relationships. And if he got sent to prison while you where "dating" you need to look at how and why you were attracted this type of person to begin with. But if you met him through on of those on line prison dating things. RUN, don't walk to your nearest therapist to find out why you are attracted to this loser. The problem is yours not his to deal with. And if you think when he gets out he'll be "cool' with it, think again. He'll have had aloooooooong time to stew over this. Good luck and I pray you don't end up dead....(40 minutes later) -PS: You wanted honest answers, it's right there in your question yet you send me a flaming, angry response to my answer. What-freaking-ever. Even though he's a felon, he should dump you and find someone better.
2007-09-16 16:48:06 · answer #1 · answered by Shel 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Cheating is cheating. Never ceases to amaze me that people here think there is some circumstance where it is acceptable. IT NEVER IS...... You might want to re evaluate your choice in guys though. Unless you are married to the guy in prison, you owe him nothing. Break it off and go be happy. By the time his sentence is up, you will have moved on, and he will most likely be over you from all the prison loving he's gonna get while on the inside anyway.
2007-09-16 16:41:42 · answer #2 · answered by Rav 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I don't know if I would call it cheating if your man really said it's cool with him, & he meant it.
But more importantly was it really cool with you?
I get the idea here that you are feeling pangs of guilt, & he's comming home soon, & you don't know what to do.
I don't recommend that you tell him anything just to release your guilty conscience. In the end you will still have the guilty conscience, & your man will know EVERYTHING, & probably not handle it as well as he said he would.
My guess is that a few things that happened to him while in prison that he will feel are better left unsaid.
I suggest that you do the same with what happened to you while you were on the outside.
2007-09-16 16:41:48 · answer #3 · answered by No More 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Well it depends. 3 years is a long time and you do have needs, but if you are married prisons usually have conjugal (sp?) visits eliminating the need to satisfy yourself elsewhere.
If you are married it is cheating. If you love him and can't imagine yourself with anyone after he is out it is cheating.
If it wasn't the most serious relationship and may not have worked in the fututre then it is not cheating as long as you tell him and break up with him.
You may have his permission, but if you dont have the comittment (and love for him) to wait then it is probably best you just get on with your life, it is cheating so when he gets out don't expect him to be too happy.
2007-09-16 16:46:01 · answer #4 · answered by Stiffler 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Its not cheating if he gave you permission. I'm not sure if your married or anything or how long you two have been together before the jail sentence. But still if it were me the guilt alone would eat me alive. I mean knowing my man is in jail and I'm out there getting it on with anybody. That is kind like spouses that cheat on their partners in the war. With permission or not, I would still feel very much in the wrong. I know people have needs but you can get toys and even take up hobbies and do other stuff than go out and get it on with someone else.
2007-09-16 16:52:11 · answer #5 · answered by Cursed_Romantic 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
it could. this is what he lived while he became into becoming up. do no longer think of that all people that had a foul formative years is undesirable nevertheless. i think of that in the time of basic terms the susceptible ones are. something individuals be attentive to authentic from incorrect and are going to upward thrust above how we've been raised. I refuse to place my toddlers and my substantial different by way of what went on at my abode as a baby. I definitely have some siblings that are drug addicts and one that is out and in of penal complex for all time. They blame their formative years for a manner they are. only because of the fact you have a foul formative years does no longer recommend which you're able to desire to stay like that continuously. that's in basic terms less demanding so the susceptible and the lazy do it. sturdy luck to you on your new existence.
2016-11-14 15:56:33 · answer #6 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
So let's see.
The poor guy is going to prison for three stinkin years, he knows these will be the hardest years of his life and he should be lucky to make it out alive. He's worried about what's going to happen, his interaction with his jailmates, and how his life is going to be turned upside down.
Then he finds out that his girlfriend or wife or whatever, is cheating on him.
Way to beat a dead horse.
2007-09-16 16:38:13 · answer #7 · answered by Nathaly 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Sex isn't a need, it's a want. Learn the difference. The way you think, it would be alright to cheat on a guy who was out of the country on military service, too.
2007-09-16 16:40:18 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
I think the biggest problem will be who you slept with. It would probably be easier for him to take if it had been a stranger. I hope the other guy is out of the picture now. Good luck!
2007-09-16 16:38:38 · answer #9 · answered by dizzkat 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
no ,its not ok even if he says so because you are questioning it.if you went away for three years would it be ok with you "he has needs".but whats done is done already talk it out but don't make excuses for it being unfaithful shows no character if you had talked your guy at first you see he was cool about so you didn't need to sneak
2007-09-16 16:39:26 · answer #10 · answered by xxhale69 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋