how do i help her with the guilt the poor kittens.?

Question

just Saturday the15th my mom and dad had a call from my bro and they wanted to have a bonfire and so we had to clean the house up a bit my 15 year old sister got mad at my mom and she started rushing things,she had to do laundry my cat had 4 9 week old kittens and two of them were sleeping in the dryer and we didn't know see them and we were looking for them after the bonfire and couldn't find them then my mom said go do a load of laundry and when i put my hand in the dryer to empty it i found a kitten and it was dead i freaked out i cried so hard like i am now and my dad came in and found the other one in there too she feels so bad and she knows it was an accident and that even if she didn't rush it still probably would of happened because you cant see over the load of clothes in your arms she feels like its her fault and we've been trying to tell her that things happen for reasons they are in hven now and who can say they would've found good homes but i also cant forget picking

up that poor little kitten all mangled and dead and we feel so bad i try to focus on the good things like them being in a better place and that god took them because it was they're time and we still have two kittens and 2 cats believe it was a true test from god and it taught my sister to look and think before she does things but we feel so bad what can we do? her cat keeps looking for them . my dad buried them this morning side by side like they would've been sleeping .and for those who are going top say well you shouldn't have had the dryer open we didn't know it was open and that room has a door and we keep it shut but people were in a hurry and things happen every thing is made to disappear or die i cant go to bed with out thinking of that kittens little face when i pulled her out all messed up and bloody we can only hope that the hit the dryer wall a couple times and died a quicker death that to suffocate please help us and please don't leave dirty comments we a traumatized enou

i still have pictures of them from just last week so i do have memories but holding that kitten kills me

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here are some pictures of marmalade and sparrow the ones who were killed and one shows their momma

Answer 1

You are so sweet for sympathizing with your sister. I got a phone call while loading the dryer once and started it back up with my big & fat cat. He made such a noise that I got him out quick.

Accidents happen. Lessons are learned. It still hurts when you love animals and you cause one pain. I don't think anyone needs to tell her to be more careful. She has been scarred by this. I will agree in prayer that you all find peace and forgiveness. (sometimes it's hardest to forgive ourselves, God already forgave it)

Answer 2

This is just sooo sad, it makes MY heart hurt! Honey, this was an accident! Accidents happen all the time. Kittens are very active and into everything, and they naturally gravitate to anything warm--I'm guessing that you had the dryer door open and were ready to get get one load out of there when your company showed up, and the kittens climbed inside--unknown to you. This is so sad, but it's a lesson well-learned. No matter what, if you have kittens, take just a moment to be sure the dryer door is closed, or the room where the washer & dryer are is closed behind you before leaving the area---no matter if President Bush shows up. It only takes a second to shut the door. There is nothing you can do about this after the fact except learn from this experience and stop blaming yourself. This could have happened to ANYONE! It's not like you placed the kittens in the dryer--you had no idea that they were there. As a final note---if your Mommy cat has more kittens that get to about this age---do a "head count" before ever starting up the washer & dryer. This is so sad. My condolences to you and your entire family.

Answer 3

A little graphic... I'm sorry that happened. Your family seems to really love animals. It's a cat though. Please remember that. I love animals. I have a cat and a dog. I also foster sick cats from the animal shelter. But you may be over reacting a little. If it was an accident what can you do? You said that everyone thought the dryer door was shut. If the kittens were sleeping then it would have been hard to notice them in the dryer!!! Hopefully they didn't suffer too much. Your family did NOTHING WRONG! Don't grieve over a kitten. It's not the end of the world. My psych teacher told me not to fret over small things because worse things could always happen.

Answer 4

I'm very sorry to hear about your loss. I know how hard it is to lose a pet, and I know how hard it is when you feel like it's your fault. I'd be lying if I said I've never been there.

There's nothing more you can really do for your sister. Just keep on doing what you're doing. Keep praying about it, and truly believe that God will give you both strength.

Think about the wonderful life that you gave those kittens, and think about the thousands that have to die in shelters every year. You gave those two kittens a wonderful life, even if it was a short one.

Perhaps to honor their memory you could donate money to your local animal shelter, or even adopt another cat. Did you know that only 18% of cats are gotten from shelters, leaving millions nation wide without homes.

Answer 5

The only good thing you can take from this is a hard lesson learned, as another poster said. Always check everything -- refrigerators, ovens, washers, dryers, freezers. If you have indoor cats, be extra cautious about letting them out when you open the door. You and your family have to get used to thinking about your cats all the time. Think of them as toddlers: your question always has to be, "Can my cat get into this? Is my cat already into this? Is it safe?" I had to rearrange my living room after I found one of my cats riding the overhead fan. Now he can't jump up there anymore. It was funny, but it wouldn't have been funny had the cat been injured. I am so sorry for your loss. If you learn from it, then at least you will have a safer and more cat-friendly environment for your cats from here on out.

Answer 6

I'm so sorry to hear of your loss and yes it was an accident. and like all accidents there is no blame but as humans we will always feel guilt, it is natural and in a way that god we do it's what makes us human and caring. If the accident had not happened your sister would have loved and looked after those kittens and that is what is important.
If i was her i would find two more cats or kittens who are looking for a caring home and bring them home to look after. Becasue she obviously has a lot of love to gve to our furry friends and the time wasted beating herself up is time you could all be caring for other cats.
Do yourself a favour and forgive yourself.

Answer 7

That's terrible. I'm so sorry. I know she feels guilty and never meant to harm the kittens. Take it as a hard lesson learned. Cats are curious and will get into everything they see. I had one who got into the dryer everytime I opened it. I had to be very careful to check for her each time I did laundry. Also, check the dishwasher and freezer everytime you open it. Cats are quick and sometimes get in there literally before our very eyes. My heart goes out to you all. Hope everything gets better now. ♥

Answer 8

I'm so sorry. Thats a terrible thing that happened and those kittens were so cute. ( that probably only makes things worse.) sorry. In order for the mom to stop looking for them go to the store and buy two little stuffed kittens and give them to her. This might help. Also buy two that look like them and give them to your sister so she can feel like they are still there with her.

I had a kitten die a little bit ago. I cried my eyes out, she was beautiful like yours. I know how it feels. I'm so so so so sorry.

Answer 9

I agree with you........accidents happen. BUT the washer/dryer doors should ALWAYS be closed, and even if they are, you should always check to make sure they're empty, before loading them up. It's just basic policy when you have little critters around the household.

I'm sorry for your loss, and never forget them.

Answer 10

aww ... I'm sorry that has happened to both of ya'll. I've heard that happen before and its always sad when an animal dies, just don't accuse of her of neglect or anything and just try to comfort each other .... you never know they could have already been dead before the laundry....