My ex and I had a misunderstanding 1 1/2 years ago. He had a problem with communication; would feel I was pursuing him to try and push him when I was just trying to talk so we could make well-informed decisions. I was good at this, and we were very happy. One day, though, I lost my job and I was not on top of things. He thought I broke up with him. It was too complicated to deal with at the time, and I let it go. He got together w/ a rebound person and I was hurt, and then, I think he thought I was just trying to either make him be with me against his will or keep him as some play –boy, but I really don’t know, because he was never even willing to admit he had lost trust in me, and I was too stressed about my job situation to be able to do serious relationship repair. For a long time, I thought he really hadn’t been in love with me in the first place, but as time passed and we had some exchanges, I gradually figured out that he feels very overwhelmed by his feelings for me and is for that reason somewhat afraid of me. Now, I am coming back to the other side of the country for my best friend’s wedding, and he is, for whatever reason, going. He’s not even that good of a friend with my best friend, I’m pretty sure it is me he wants to see. But, he has been with a new girlfriend for 4 months. In the past two weeks, we started talking and explaining some of his actions in a different light for the first time. Last Thursday, I got a text from him saying, “Do you want to tell me why I should trust you again?” I texted him back once, but I haven’t heard from him. I don’t want to seem pushy, so I texted him a second time saying I wanted to talk, but I would wait for him to call. But, he has not called. The wedding is next weekend. There are many things I could explain to him that would probably make things better, but I think we really need to talk, because I don’t know exactly where to begin. Should I chill or write him an email?
2007-09-16 13:15:46 · 11 answers · asked by Christina V 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Weddings
You need to chill. Please do not attempt to keep contacting him.
And just a friendly warning: This question is exactly the same as myrtlebough's question below. Christina, it is a violation of the community guidelines to post the same question multiple times under different names.
Please stop, before someone reports you.
2007-09-16 13:23:37 · answer #1 · answered by Suz123 7 · 4⤊ 0⤋
there are 2 opportunities. the two he has or has consistently had a element for you and now he's attempting to make a circulate now that the courting along with your ex is irretrievably over, and facebook could be a great thank you to 'attempt the waters' as you're the two on it each and all of the time and neither of you will possibly might desire to dedicate to something to talk. OR he's been sent by using your ex as a undercover agent, to make certain the type you're getting alongside (do you have happy statuses, a clean boyfriend and so on.) so as that in case you look falling aside your ex can sense extra constructive approximately himself or once you're happy and have a clean boyfriend or despite, he can cry into the silent pillow of his ideas. that being stated, the only thank you to make certain is to ask him as we talk, on line or in individual, nonetheless on line war of words is as a rule disregarded in such circumstances, why he's including you, if he needs you he will probable say 'i used to be hoping we could be associates even nonetheless bla bla bla..' or something alongside those lines and if sent to undercover agent, he will panic and probable forget approximately you or make up an excuse (it replaced right into a mistake, i purely extra you for the sake of it, its harmless...) you get the belief
2016-10-09 07:46:59 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think it is time to move on for good. What is the use of revisiting the past. If he is in another relationship that just means he doesn't want to settle down or rather he is not ready to. If he cannot face his feelings for you, then why should you waste time wondering "what if..." You'll always be stuck in the past while he moves on to another girl and might one day find "the one" all the while you're still thinking about him. Instead of pondering, be nice at the wedding tell him all the feelings you have of him when you do see him face to face and maybe finally you'll be able to do yourself a favor and find Mr. Right.
2007-09-16 13:25:17 · answer #3 · answered by vixen 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Now that I've read this a second time under a different name, your situation is a lot more clear to me. You are obsessed with your ex boyfriend. After a breakup a year and a half ago, he has moved on, and you have not, and are constantly demanding his time. I have no doubt that from his current girlfriend's perspective, you are the ex girlfriend from hell who won't leave him alone. He does NOT need to talk, and you do not need to resolve old issues with him b/c you two are no longer dating and the points are now moot. I recommend you do not write him that email and move on.
2007-09-16 13:55:43 · answer #4 · answered by Ms. X 6 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Chill. Just leave it as it is. Go to the wedding and take a friend and act like you are having the time of your life. If he wants to dance or something, go ahead. Don't drink--maybe you can have 2 glasses of wine, but that's it. Prepare yourself for the possibility that he is bringing his new gf. This on-again off-again relationship sounds too fragile to me.
2007-09-16 13:28:00 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Your not going to like my answer much. If you read what you wrote you blamed your entire break up on your job loss. If a relationship is that weak it should be broken worse then it is already. You, for whatever reason, can't handle a relationship with him or any other man right now. Cut your losses and run!
2007-09-16 13:33:24 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
You need to CHILL !!!!! Do not push, let him take the lead and see how he handles it. If he talks listen to what he has to say, and maybe hold judgment until he is done. At the end of that conversation, you will have a better idea, of where both of you stand. Maybe he didn't like your explanation and is not ready to talk, if that is the case, then you need to move on.
2007-09-16 13:29:11 · answer #7 · answered by LIPPIE 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
As far as the wedding it is not your day it is someone elses day,not to be used in any manner if you know what I mean.As far as you two..there are some real trust and personal differences that clash.Don't let being alone be a weakness.
2007-09-16 13:26:16 · answer #8 · answered by stones 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Chill - go to the wedding and have a wonderful time. Be civil to him but leave it at that.. there's no point in starting drama on your friend's special day.
2007-09-16 13:24:05 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
It's been a YEAR AND A HALF! Get over it already. Stop trying to read into things. Guys aren't that cryptic. They usually say what they mean and mean what they say.
And if they don't call you, it's because they don't want to talk to you.
2007-09-16 13:47:06 · answer #10 · answered by Proud Momma 6 · 2⤊ 0⤋