boyfriend...college...depressed?

Question

So my boyfriend of 10months has been going to a college for 3 weeks now. He comes home every Friday night and leaves every Sunday night. We talk on the phone for an hour Monday thru Thursday. It seems like the perfect arrangement, but my heart tells me otherwise. Everybody I have ever cared about has always been there at my disposal, which is why I’m having the hardest time dealing with him being away even if it 4 days.
I hate Sundays only because it means I have to endure the pain of him leaving me to go back to college. I’m a VERY emotional person, and being away from him is effecting my health, I always feel so sick and nauseated and because I’m nauseated all the time I never want to eat. I’ve never known this pain before, like its unnatural to be away from your soul mate even for a short period of time. I believe he is my soul mate because I’ve never meet a guy who loved and treated me so well, and puts me first in his life (even in head of his buddies).
I’ve told him about unhappy I have been but he tells me to just transfer to his school and I’ll be happy. If it was that simple I would., I’m a big family orientated person and being away from my family would be just as hard. I don’t understand why he doesn’t just transfer to a college closer to me. I would make me happier, as well as healthier and save him gas money.

What do you think?

Answer 1

He's going to the college of his choice and to try to change that is merely an attempt to change him for yoru own purposes. Similarly had he insisted on you changing, he would be guilty of the same thing.

Your problem is to deal with the separation each week. My warnign is that if you persist in being unhappy, stessing out ove rit and all that, he will soon tire of all the extra baggage you are carryign and may well stop coming home as often or come home but be too busy to see you.

So, get a grip on yourself. Eat sleep and otherwise live wisely. Stay healthy and active. Keep busy all week so you are up to date on yoru school work and family responsibilities by Friday night so the weekends are free to have fun with him (as opposed to dragging him down with yrou problems).

And look at Sunday night as the beginning of a new week that will end with him back in town; yes it is a a matter of perspective and a litttle hard to do but for your own health and your relationship with him, you gotta change the attitude.

Oh, and make sure weekends are spent doing things yoiu both enjoy and that does nto mean sitting aroudn doing the talk thing. Go to a movie, a sports event, take a long walk n the park, go swimming at the Y, etc. Stuff you can do that is fun and enjoyable. Then in the evening head for a movie, concert or play and grab a bite to eat together. But rule of the weekend is to keep it light, happy and fun...

Answer 2

I think that he chose that school for a reason, and if the school that you go to had as much to offer as his, he would have chosen it. You are messing with his education, and his future for making a living. I will ask you this, If he was in the military, how would you handle that? You can't always have everything your way, and you are manipulating him with your actions, which is not cool in a relationship. If he was to get killed, ( I pray he doesn't) you would have to go on without him, just like you have to go on without him for only 4 days. Time to change and figure out why you need to have your way.

Answer 3

I understand where ur coming from, but why should he have to give up what he has started already, just to make u happy. You may have to be the one that sacrifics, either him or ur family. Best of luck to yall!!!

Answer 4

I think that your putting yourself first..
You dont want to compromise because it will put you in a uncomfortable situation. I think that its only fair that you stop thinking about what you want and consider putting him first for a chance.. Its the least you can do.. After all he has spoiled you...