How much is too much for a mother to call a grown son with a family just to talk.?

Question

Once a month?
Once a week?
Once a day?
Twice a day?
Three times a day?

This IS about my hus. He works 3 nights at week. His mother called AT LEAST once yesterday (just like every day), so she SHOULD know he works tonight and is asleep, but she called and woke my son up anyway.

I am very close with my dad, but we don't call each other EVERY day. AND I certainly wouldn't call when my stepbrother is sleep and risk waking him up.

She's so "close" with him that he lived less than 8 miles from her for over three years and she came to his house ONCE. She was on vaca, drove within 6 miles of our house, but was just too busy to stop. She went 15 miles up the interstate and spent the night.

I'm definitely NOT in competition with her. I'm sure she doesn't like me. I won't let her smoke in my house and that pisses her off. He leaves his cell on for WORK, not mommy. WHY would I worry about answering her call when my child is crying?????? She's NOT my primary responsibilty. My child crying and waking up my hus who has to WORK tonight is my concern.

Answer 1

I would say more than 2 or 3 times a week is too much, unless there is something going on that requires more involvement.

Answer 2

I think that how ever many times she calls is ok I guess as long as she is not disrtupting your daily lifes. If she knows he is sleeping then I would answer and say he is sleeping, and that you will tell him to call her when he gets up. Listen of course you have to be respectful and not a doormat. Its your home, your family so don't let her take over.Talk to your man about it first it is his place to put her in check if it still doesn't work then girl check her. I know exact;y what you are going through I married a mothers pride and joy and girl..... I don't have enough time to tell you anything. I understand that every mother feels no one is good enough for there child I am a mother also but as long as her child is happy thats what matters. PLEASE DO NOT let her get inbetween you two. In laws are big issues and sometimes are reason for divorce, don't let it get to that point. You and your man have to be united no matter what. And you both also have to compromise and decide what is good for the BOTH of you. Good luck

Answer 3

It depends on their relationship, how close they are. and also what ever those two are comfortable with. It's something they should chat about. If the calls are interrupting the day and interrrupting HIS family life, then something should be said. sometimes the apron strings and umbillical cord need to be cut. if the son is an adult he would let the mother know when too much might just be too much

Answer 4

It depends on the mother and son and the nature of their relationship. Some mothers and sons are very close and talk to each other every day. Others check in every once in a while. If you're talking about your husband and your mother in law and you feel they talk to each other too much, talk to your husband about it. Do you feel your husband gives his mother more attention than he gives you? Is their relationship affecting your relationship with your husband? You won't be able to resolve anything here. Talk to him if that's what this question is about.

Answer 5

Once a day is okay if it is a short, how ya doin kind of call. How is her relationship with you? If there is any animosity that could be the reason she doesn't come over. And why don't you answer the phone if he is sleeping? If it was his cell she called and he left it on while sleeping, he must want her to be abe to get ahold of him when she wants.
Try not to be in competition with her. If you feel she is interrupting your time with your man, tell him because it will ultimately be up to him to create boundaries with his mom.

Answer 6

Two or three times a day is a bit much, but if they are/were close, then I don't see anything wrong with them talking daily to keep each other informed.

Answer 7

it depends on the situation.....
if there is something wrong family wise, like a sudden illness/death, then maybe 2-3 times a day is ok, once a day can get a bit annoying, but once a week is fine

Answer 8

i come from a very close Italian family we all call each other at least 3 times a day and who ever don't like it oh well you cant call from the grave at least i don't think so but we keep it short unless there is gossip or drama....

Answer 9

it depends on how close the mother and son are. I have a son who is 14 and we are really close. Always have been and nothing can change that..... not even a wife and kids... when he's old enough for all that.

Answer 10

I think once a day is enough.