advise on how to communicate with his father. His father does not call him on the phone and does not visit him. He is depressed and sad. Any tips on how he can have a relationship with his dad? He knows where his dad lives. The last time he saw his dad was when his dad stopped by very briefly to say hi only because he was in the area and a relative saw him and told him to come see his son.
2007-09-15 21:51:42 · 16 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
although i agree with everyone in that hes probable not worth it anyway. in an attempt to actually answer the question i would say try to find something the father is into and ask him to if he wants to go do that. sometimes Aholes are only that way because they dont realize what they are missing and ignorance and irresponsibility is no reason to give up on a person one fishing trip might change both of there lives forever, it might be negitive or it could be the best thing ever.
2007-09-15 22:01:51 · answer #1 · answered by cheezy 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
This is so sad I know because I was in a similar situation with my son. Unfortunately you cannot make his dad be a father. So the best you can do is contact him his dad and tell him how his son feels and see where that goes which may be nowhere. The next thing you can do is talk with your son and let him know that unfortunately his father is who he is but that does not mean he is not loved. Which again won't mean much to your son because he is looking for something you cannot give him right now his fathers love and I know it is killing you too. However if you can find a male role model such as an uncle or older brother or family friend that is willing to spend some quality time with him you don't know how priceless that will be for him at this time. For his development, self esteem, manhood, selfworth ect. He is feeling rejected by his own father none the less and that really sucks. So if another man can step up to the plate for you and fill those shoes the best he can that would be great your son will definetely be better off in the long run. Good luck to both of you.
2007-09-16 05:00:51 · answer #2 · answered by Darkchild 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
usually in this case the father himsself had awkward relationship w/ his own father. Now it's just a vicious cycle of lack of communication, amoungst other things. If his father isn't taking the initiative, HE should. My brother and father have gone through the same thing and it got a lot better once my brother told him how he needs him and felt he wasn't there for him/concerned. They really have to open up those lines of communication! Some ppl just need to be made aware of the consequences of thier actions, or lack thereof....
2007-09-16 05:00:45 · answer #3 · answered by charmed 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Is the kid in question your boyfriend? I was married to a guy with father issues. Tough road to travel.
The best you can do is just be there when your friend is down. You can't make the dad become a part of his life. Since I was married, I made contact with my ex's dad when I gave birth to my son. I thought he might like to know that he was a grandfather. We exchanged letters for a while but my ex was so upset with his dad for not being a part of his life growing up that he asked me to stop. We all went to visit the dad twice, and after we split up I took my kids to see their grandpa once (with my ex's approval). Still, my ex and his dad have very little contact, although they occasionally talk.
You have to remember that this is THEIR issue to work out. Your friend might feel a void but you can't get anyone to fill it. You sound like a wonderful person, just be there for your friend. :)
2007-09-16 05:00:20 · answer #4 · answered by 1M9 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I'm sorry, but this probably isn't fixable. He can't make his father care, and his father sounds like an ******. Instead, he should look for male figures he can actually have a relationship with -- perhaps join Big Brothers or find a male teacher who will mentor him. Also, volunteering with younger kids by tutoring might make him feel needed and wanted and therefore cheer him up.
2007-09-16 04:56:51 · answer #5 · answered by Katherine W 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
It's upsetting when things like this happen. I wish I could help your friend out...but I really can't. If the dad really isn't around then he obviously doesn't care. Make sure this boy knows that a guy like that isn't worth his time, he should spend his time with his mom/siblings/other relatives etc instead of worrying about somebody who isn't going to change.
2007-09-16 14:08:46 · answer #6 · answered by BreezeGirl 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Oh my dear friend, that is so sad, just remember dad's are 'kids' to, send Dad a letter, if this does not work, sorry, you will then just have to get on with your life and wait for the man to grow up.
2007-09-16 05:00:35 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Deadbeet Dad. All he can do is lay it on the line, tell his father how he feels and if he doesn't respond then find another male figure in his life that he can look up to.
2007-09-16 04:57:06 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Is the son or father depressed and sad?
2007-09-16 04:56:32 · answer #9 · answered by angieblossom 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sad as it is, his father can not be made to be a caring father. You should perhaps get your son into counseling. He is problably thinking it is his fault his father is behaving like such a prick.
2007-09-16 04:57:53 · answer #10 · answered by Sparkles 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋