Does anyone ever feel like nobody has time to talk anymore?

Question

You try talking to family members and they are always in a hurry. On their way to one thing or another or they get this look on their face and their body language says can you hurry please. Just curious. I think today people are just to busy and self absorbed. Just my opinion. An example my fourteen year old cat is sick. My husband says coldly she is going to die. Just like that. By the way I have her at the vet today. She is not dieing she has an infection.

Wow! I think it sad that most people here are ok with all the stress and the busyness. No wonder marriages dont work and we are all a ticking time bomb.

Answer 1

I agree with you!

I make an effort to be understanding of other's peoples time constraints. If I really want to visit with someone I invite them over or out to dinner and that way I have their scheduled and undivided attention.

If someone is point blank rude when they have taken my time to talk at length but don't have the time to return the favor I ask them if they have something they'd rather be doing or about their schedule. Then I mention that the next time they have time to listen to a really great story or spend time with me--I can't wait to tell them about it. This has the effect of calling attention to their rude one-sidedness and if the person is genuinely busy and/or interested in you then they will make sure to allow for more time to have a two-sided conversation.


BTW, some people don't understand the emotional connection a person can have to a beloved family pet. Don't take it as coldness so much as he's not aware of your feelings and sensitive to them. It's usually an oversight on the part of a man when he doesn't acknowledge feelings--men are trained to move the emotional part of their brain straight to the logic part--the pragmatic side just takes over.

Answer 2

I think today people are just to busy and self absorbed

Everyone is that way no matter who we are
it's just who we were made to be, none can claim any different
it's all about our needs and how to meet them,

From the point of birth we are destined to be that way even in love we are self centered for it's all about what we want in it and what it gives to us it's never about one another cause the truth is if it were well we couldn't accept it,

ok so with that said i am sorry that your husband did say that about your cat,

and the truth is about talking to another it's only really when we are looking something out of them like companionship or a friendship for that time anyways which is another reason friendships never really last

we are not meant to give so much of ourselves or at least can't i don't know anyone who would give up anything for just a friend or a best friend a loved one maybe but friends no,
when tested no we don't deliver, but it's ok thought because most of us never get their

the truths is Love is the closest thing to a real relationship in our lives or a non selfish act i mean other than our religions but then again do we really want to their it just may shed a different light on things but not now

my point is look for the world and you will receive failure but look for something else who knows you may find hope...
or even more...

Answer 3

Sounds like you are very dependent. You need to learn to have fun on your own, pick up some hobbies, do things you enjoy. "I don't want people to "talk" or assume I am not happy when sometimes I am." Sometimes being happy? Sounds like you are mostly depressed, or stressed or overall unhappy.. Marriage takes work from both people, counseling is a major step and can really save a marriage, if things progress, you could have a rough future with your husband. If you have "considered cheating", you should consider divorce instead. Cheating will not rectify your needs permanently and certainly will not help your husband who seems to be working to support you both. You're young, you can recover from a divorce and go on to lead a healthy life. The longer you continue on this road, the older you're going to get and the more time you're going to waste. Bring this up with your husband - that is a must. Things are not going to just all of the sudden be perfect.

Answer 4

I agree.

We are all very self-absorbed these days, but thankfully I live in a place where it is ok to slow down, appreciate things, and be laid back about life.

On the other side of the coin, the Internet has changed people's lives so much that the ability to converse and socialize with one another now seem like lost arts.

Leave the computers, cell phones, bluetooths, crackberries and iPods at home, and take the time to smell the coffee. Do this just one day a week, and stress can disappear.

Good luck with the kitty, too. We need to take care of our friends, furry and otherwise.

Answer 5

Yes. We have become way too busy. Work and activities have worked their way into our every waking moment. We are always doing, on our way to doing, or getting ready to be on our way to doing. So people don't just drop by any more. Everything must be planned. Schedules must match. Regretfully, I'm not much different. I am spread too thin at work and when people stop me to talk, I get agitated. Just yesterday I had to go out to one of my facilities to see a problem and another one of my supervisors was there wanting to brainstorm about another issue. It was an impromptu meeting, forming on the spot and becoming a ball-and-chain, coagulating my schedule. I had to stop him, saying I didn't have time for a surprise meeting. Yes, I'm guilty.

We have no margin. Talking encroaches on whatever margin we have, and when we have no margin, we get grouchy. Guilty as charged. I can hardly wait until retirement!

Answer 6

Well thank goodness it was only an infection. Talking to family? I do IM my neice sometimes, maybe once a month. I call my mom every Sunday at 7AM like clockwork! The last time I left my own daughter a phone message to call me about lunch, I never heard back from her. That hurts. I know people are busy with their lives, but for cry'n out loud, return phone messages!

So if you just need to chat, email me!

Answer 7

I would take this personally if I were you. If you were a pleasure to talk to and be with, people wouldn't act like they were in a hurry when they were around you. They would stick around and listen to what you had to say.

I have an elderly aunt who always complains and tries to make you feel guilty for not visiting her more often. She talks about the same things all the time and is someone I can only take in small doses. She often tells me her kids are always in a hurry to leave when they visit her and I can understand why.


I'm not being mean, just realistic.

Answer 8

I'm so sorry to hear about your cat. Mine is 20 years old and I don't know what I'm going to do when she eventually passes.

As for your question, yes I do.
Then I realise that I like talking to myself so much more anyway.

Answer 9

A certain amount is important, yes. But my family is a buch of marathon mouths and I've always got someones jaws rattling in my ear.

I wish they would all shut up and DO something for a change beside just talk.

Answer 10

i dont have many good friends (about 3 or 4 good ones) but i have a husband who does listen to me when i need to talk.
there are times when he doesnt. but when i sulk and behave like a sweet lil girl (usual behavior - crazee) , he will reflect on his "bad attitude" earlier and start to ask me about whatever issues which was bothering me. so i say, u just have to find some ways where u can make him wanna come to u and start listening/ caring. we must learn how to start to care for others first - im not saying u dont but just wanna say it anyway. try asking them about their day (sincerely) , be funny, stroke ur husband's hair, massage his shoulders and ask him anything he likes (e.g. how's it going with ur snooker skill?) may not be what u like but thats how u get people to get interested and many times, thats how u get people to want to talk to u.

regarding marriages: dont let the water run dry. :)