So last week I pre-ordered the new iPod touch with my OWN hard earned money (keep that in mind). My "parents" said that I'm not allowed to have it until my room is neat (meaning no speck of dust, neat drawers, organized closet, spotless floor, etc.) Now I'm a junior in high school and have no time between homework, school, and my job to have time to clean up a room from top to bottom. By them doing this to me, its like holding a treat over a dog's head (here's what you want, but you will never get it unless you obey my command). I'm at the point where I'm extremely pissed, and ready to just run away because of all the crap I have to put up with in this hell hole, and here I try to treat myself, since work, home, AND school has been extremely stressful, and my "parents" hold a $300 item over my head because of a room I have NO TIME to clean up. Someone please tell me a way I can convince my "parents" to get this without having to clean up my room when they feel I can, when I can't.
2007-09-15 01:34:04 · 25 answers · asked by panicaddiction 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
***think about it*** Would you listen to a "parent" who always puts you down and talks crap to you while the other just sits back, watches, and doesn't do a single thing about it?
2007-09-15 02:02:40 · update #1
It really doesn't take any extra time to clean up your room, if you never let it get messy to begin with.
Put stuff where it belongs, when you put it down & you won't have a problem. All it takes is a change in your habits - not a change in your schedule.
And, yes, as long as you are under 18 (and not emancipated), your parents do get to decide what you have and what you do with your time & money. They are trying to *teach* you responsibility and proper behavior. If you show them that you already know this, then they will back off.
2007-09-15 03:31:20 · answer #1 · answered by Maureen 7 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Wow this is a tough one. As a parent who was once a teenager (yes remember we were your age once, and we do remember what it was like, well most of the time anyway) I can see your point and theirs. As one of the answers says, your room probably didnt get like this overnight, and they have probably asked you to clean it up more than a couple of times. I also understand that this is your hard earned money, and other than for safety, health or legal reasons, your parents really shouldn't have a say in how you spend it, especially when it is for something like an ipod.
You said you pre-ordered it, which means it won't be coming for awhile, and it is YOUR room, and YOU mad the mess right? So wouldn't it be considered your obligation? Im sure your parents don't charge you rent, or make you pay for your own food, or all of your own clothes, so they are taking care of you. Take a half hour out each day till its cleaned to their satisfaction, then just simply pick up after yourself from now on, no more problem. I wish I had the perfect answer, I dont, you need to really think about how much you will loose if you do run away, its a big mean cold world and the world will expect alot more from you than a clean room, trust me.
2007-09-21 12:11:14 · answer #2 · answered by Mary D 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Good on you for earning the money for the iPod. I can see where you are coming from, sounds pretty normal that you want independence, but I think you are getting just a bit ahead of yourself. In a few years, you will be out of high school and can and will do your own thing. Until then, you have some responsibilities as a kid that come before your job really, such as studying and showing some respect to your parents. Did they ask you to clean your room, and when they got no action, were forced to resort to ultimatums? That could piss them off too, just as much as it has pissed you off. It is good you can earn your own money to buy things, but this does not mean as a teenager that you are independent. If your studies and job alone are that stressful, then maybe have a think about whether you are really ready to do everything yourself as well, such as cooking, cleaning, washing, earning your own rent etc. My suggestion would be just stop worrying and clean the room. If you complain too much, they might insist you cut back on the job, which might be worse for you. Good luck, and hope you enjoy the iPod.
2007-09-15 02:55:42 · answer #3 · answered by Max 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Nobody likes cleaning their room. I hate it and my bedroom is a disaster. My workroom is a disaster. And I'm 45. No ipod for me!
Have you got any siblings? Would they clean your room for a small fee? In order to have your ipod back, it might be worth it.
Parents do a lot of things to motivate their children to be responsible, polite, and yes, tidy, too. I'm sorry they chose that item to punish you with, though. It obviously has upset you considerably.
No running away, though. As hellish as your parents' house feels, you've got to calm yourself down and breathe. Unless you've got a stable home situation to run to, the world outside is a brutal place. You would be robbed, beat up, and possibly raped. Yes, they do rape boys.
Back to Mom & Dad: Write down a list of grievances and justifications why you think these things should change. Also include why these things bother you so much. Take the list to your parents at sometime when no one is busy or distracted, and ask to have a word with them.
If you want your parents' attention, you have to be calm, keep your language clean and don't raise your voice. No tears. I think you will find that they will listen much better, and maybe compromise, or even give over.
Take care, honey. Your parents really are trying to do what they think is best for you. Their intentions are good, and they love you very much.
TX Mom
2007-09-22 10:01:51 · answer #4 · answered by TX Mom 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Your parents are just trying to teach you that certain things come first in life. It is hard to raise children. Please remember that, and they are doing the best they can. They might be trying to teach you that no matter how busy life gets, you can still be neat. They work all day too, and is your house the way your room is? If so, then they are wrong, but if the house is clean, then maybe that is what they are trying to teach you. Just take some time, maybe go to bed a 1/2 an hour later a couple of nights, and clean your room.
2007-09-15 01:59:07 · answer #5 · answered by jt mom 2 · 3⤊ 0⤋
Yeah - and your parents who work, run a household, take care of you, run you where you need to go have ever so much free time to deal with an ungrateful child who won't follow one simple command.
They can withhold the item as long as you live in their house (side note: legally they would have to return it to you upon your 18th birthday....and they could also put you on the curb that same day too!) and from the sounds of it the issue of your room did not come up over night. Meaning they have asked you probably a hundred times to clean it -- here's a thought.......clean it?
Sitting around on the computer sulking is wasting time that you could be doing what you were asked to do. Get up a little earlier, stay up a little later, get off the computer for a couple of days and do as your asked -- it won't kill you.
2007-09-15 01:55:11 · answer #6 · answered by Susie D 6 · 4⤊ 0⤋
You're a junior in high school, living under their roof.
Once your out of their house on your own.. you're going to need to work, go to classes (college) and keep the place your living clean, as well as cook for yourself.. the reality is..
you've made up excuses on why you can't clean your room.. but their bad excuses..
You can make time to clean your room.. and if you really wanted your IPOD then you'd do that.
Your parents have a right to take the IPOD away too.. you're living in their house, under age.. and not doing your fair share around the house.. yes you may have school and work. but keeping your room clean is such a little thing to ask !
Good grief.. grow up and clean your room !
2007-09-22 21:18:02 · answer #7 · answered by Chris 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Do you're best not to leave a mess behind you as you go, and pick up just a little bit in your spare time. It will get cleaner as you go. Clothes in the hamper, folded straight out of the dryer and hung up... also, I agree with you on the Ipod thing, but "whatcha gonna do?" Don't run away, life is hard when you're underage and you might end up going down a bad path, one you normally wouldn't have taken hadn't you been so desperate. Tough it out, and as soon as you're 18, get outta there! And just remember, things will get better. You're already showing a great deal of responsibility, good job! Oh, and save that hard earned cash for deposits on a rental and utilities, that way you have it when you're ready.
2007-09-20 17:11:13 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
You sound like me. Unfortunately, I can tell you that you have nothing to complain about...here's why. nothing can get done without a clean room. cleanliness is godliness!! Cleaning your room is getting back to basics. I would be concerned, if I were a parent, too... if you are running around crazy all day, work, tests, studying, school... social life? ?
You need to have a CALM, relaxing PEACEFUL environment for YOURSELF.. it's not FOR YOUR PARENTS.. it's for you!! a healthier you. You cannot do homework, study, or even THINK straight with things unorganized, and cluttered! ya know?
forget luxuries of an i-pod and working full time.. you don't even have a place to read a book! ya know?
It's like the people that buy expensive houses, drive fancy cars, and then take their families to eat at McDonalds... PRIORITIES!
It concerns me more that you HAVE NO TIME TO CLEAN YOUR ROOM.. that's the biggest concern.. who cares if you can buy fancy things, or carry too much responsibility on your shoulders. your parents obviously aren't impressed.. so why are you killing yourself to be GREAT.. if it doesn't even give you time to CLEAN YOUR ROOM! ya know? give yourself a break. I think your parents just want you to have 'ME' time. If you're doing all this work, and have no time for yourself.. you're working yourself too hard!
Plus, are you really doing that well in school? I mean, maybe your parents don't really need you to work full time? I'm just assuming, I don't know you or your financial situation, but if you're not understanding or focusing or interested in doing well at school... then the rest is just more weight holding you down... who cares about an i-pod..(don't get me wrong i-pods are fine), but if you don't even give yourself space or a place to sit down, relax, and ENJOY your i-pod, among, your priorities of school work.. then WHAT ARE YOU DOING!?? ya get me?
Take a break, clean your room... and hit the books;)
no, but seriously, there maybe something you don't understand about school.. which is why you're escaping, and doing everything BUT being organized...
Just an idea...
Take care, relax, give yourself time to breathe,
and good luck!!
2007-09-15 04:22:07 · answer #9 · answered by Gina D 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
No time to clean your room? You had time to put a question on here. My whole house is clean and i do it all by myself when I am not running my 6 yr old to school, chasing after my 1 yr old, fixing lunches, getting my car fixed, paying bills, buying groceries working, working out, mowing the yard, picking my 6 yr old up from school, fixing dinner, giving my 6 yr old a bath, giving my one yr old a bath, playing with my kids, putting my kids to bed, reading bedtime stories, changing diapers, and watching my favorite tv show! Boy I tell you us parents are some inconsiderate a##holes. Quit being a baby. Clean up your room. If I had to tell you one more time your Ipod would get flushed down the toilet.
2007-09-21 16:24:48 · answer #10 · answered by natasha 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋