I found this forum board and i have been posting there for about 2 months. I've meet some great people via this forum especially this one poster. He seems soo cool and smart, i was thinking that he would be a cool friend to gain.
The problem is that i'm too nosey and curious for my own good, i can't help it. I typed in this user name and found out that has been posting on a white supermacist site. The thing is i'm black. I have become on such good terms with term that i've given him my email address.
What should i do now???
I promise top point for the answerer who helps me out the most, thanks
.
2007-09-15 00:03:20 · 5 answers · asked by Blackout 2 in Society & Culture ➔ Etiquette
Does he know you're black? If he does and his still cordial to you and hasn't changed his treatment of you, I would be inclined to feel out his thoughts on racism without mentioning you googled him (or whatever search engine you used).
Do you know what he's been posting? People will post on the "enemy's" forums just to play devil's advocate. Are you positive about his posts?
Also, does he have a significant other or a close relative/friend who shares his ID? I personally would never share my ID, but I know partners or household members who share an ID.
If he doesn't know your race, are you comfortable revealing it to him to see how he reacts?
Overall, it's a risky proposition to extend even an email address in this day and age, especially if you've only known a faceless representation for 2 months. I'm not chiding you; I've learned from experience that online personas can be manipulated to seem like anyone at all.
I would simply keep a low profile, discuss topics without encouraging more closeness. You simply need to know him better before you decide what to do. 2 months is a very brief time to get to know people in real life; 2 months on the web can lend a false air of intimacy and confidence, but it doesn't really let you know about anyone for sure.
My suggestion is to refrain from emailing him until you know more for sure. If he is supremecist, it will come out eventually. Has he emailed you? If so, I'd put him on hold for a while. When I started having misgivings about giving someone my email address, I told her that I was receiving too much mail (true) so that email response time would not be in her or anyone's favor. Then I gradually withdrew and slowly stopped engaging her on the web until she stopped contacting me.
2007-09-15 00:17:56 · answer #1 · answered by Buttercup 6 · 5⤊ 1⤋
I believe I'd ask him directly if he's the same poster as the other. If you google my name, I understand you come up with a lot of hits that are not me and a lot that are. I wouldn't tell him your race at first. You could also ask him his views on African Americans if you can work it into an email: "I can't believe there are still so many families living in FEMA trailers this long after Katrina" or something like that--in other words, can you find an opportunity to ask him racial questions in an innocent context? I always think a direct approach is best. If he's a white supremist, tell him you're Black and see how he responds. It could be interesting. If you and he have been friendly, you could be the beginning of an awakening for him. If he's allowed himself to become friends with you, maybe he'll re-examine his thinking. Many of us think people's views don't change, and good people do re-assess their values constantly. Perhaps you're the person life has sent to him to help his spiritual progress. You could be a critical lesson to force him to challenge ingrained thinking---or you could find the two posters are different people.
2007-09-15 00:23:37 · answer #2 · answered by David M 7 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Unless you feel it would be unsafe, consider continuing to just be yourself.
Human beings get so caught up in appearances, but here it is reversed.
A black person discovers some decency/intelligence or other good side of an ignorant person who chooses to hate.
A white supremacist is unwittingly able to see past your skin color to the person with the same value and equal worth as anyone else.
Just keep being yourself, and pray for this person's heart to be softened and eventually changed.
Also, keep up the good work with checking up on people- there is nothing wrong with a healthy outlook like that.
Ask someone who knows more than you about these things to check you out on line, and never give out personal info. of any type that could give away your location.
Consider the possibility that one day when it may come to light, this person may go the wrong way with finding out who you are, and allow feeling embarrassed to make him vengeful. You are smart to be cautious, and you can NEVER, ever be too cautious with anything/anyone on line. Period.
2007-09-15 01:07:55 · answer #3 · answered by gettin'real 5 · 2⤊ 0⤋
First of all, I'm not after points
What kind of comments was he posting on this white supremacist site? Maybey he is agianst it, maybey he is for it.
If I were you, next time you have contact with him I would drop him a hint that you are black. If he is racist, Don't waste your time talking to him. Let him know that good people come from all races (as well as bad for that matter) by letting him know you are black. If he is small minded and racist don't bother with him.
2007-09-15 00:21:34 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 4⤊ 0⤋
I wouldn't tell him you are black just yet.
Make sure that that person on the white supremacy site is him first of all. It may not be him.
If it is, I'd wait until he says something supremacy-like, and see what his reaction is when you say you are black.
2007-09-15 11:36:07 · answer #5 · answered by Terri 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋