If an obituary says, in lieu of flowers donations can be made to...?

Question

It means that they don't want flowers sent, right? I am so used to sending flowers to funerals that it seems kind of weird. Kind of like when you get an invite to a party, and they say, no gifts please...and then you wonder if they really want them. I don't know, should I just make a donation???

Answer 1

Yes, it means they don't want flower. Flowers are nice, but once the funeral is over, all of those flowers have to go somewhere. Making a donation to the requested place honors the family and the deceased and the money is put to good use rather than on flowers that will soon die away.

Answer 2

Donations In Lieu Of Flowers

Answer 3

If you don't send flowers, definately make the donation. In Asia, it is more common for people to donate to help defray the funeral costs than buy wreaths. Although the deaseased ex-company etc may send a collective wreath, individuals usually donate to the family. Since the obituary said 'in lieu of flowers', you could do either, but a donation is definately more practical, with the cost of a decent funeral these days.

Answer 4

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RE:
If an obituary says, in lieu of flowers donations can be made to...?
It means that they don't want flowers sent, right? I am so used to sending flowers to funerals that it seems kind of weird. Kind of like when you get an invite to a party, and they say, no gifts please...and then you wonder if they really want them. I don't know, should I just make a...

Answer 5

That seems like an odd request to me, to deposit money into a bank account for the surviving sister. I've seen in trust for surviving dependents or to a charity of some sort, but not into someone's bank account. Seems fishy to me. But anyway, usually when donations are in lieu of flowers, it is recorded with the institution who the donation was from, who it's on behalf of (the decedent) and the amount. Some time after the donations are made, a notification is sent to the family informing them of the donations that were made in honor of the decedent.

Answer 6

Yes, make the donation and forget the flowers. Chances are that your donation is going to support a charity that was important in some way to whoever passed away. The donation will serve far better good than a vase of flowers.

Answer 7

Yes send the donation to where they request. Some people feel the flowers to be wasteful, and they are kind of a pain to deal wish after the services.

Some here have said that the donation is to defray the funeral costs. I have to disagree, it is typically a donation to a charity important to the deceased, particularly a charity related to whatever disease he or she suffered from. Covering the funeral costs would be an exception, although I agree that they tend to be very expensive.

Sorry for your loss.

Answer 8

Sometimes families get so many flowers that they can't handle all of them, and they feel guilty throwing them away. Personally, I don't like the donation thing, so if they say no flowers, I send a card.

Answer 9

Do not send flowers! The family has explicitly asked that people NOT do this. Please respect their wishes and make the donation if you choose to, or just send them a card with a note expressing your condolences. I know from personal experience that sometimes receiving flowers after a death can cause great anxiety. I took all the arrangements directly to the trash, God forgive me -- but I just couldn't handle it! People meant well, but it wasn't the right thing for me.

Answer 10

You should do as the family request. Recently a member of our family passed and the family asked that donations be made to to the ACA because she had died of cancer. The funeral home still filled up with flowers and there was no place to take them after because she was cemented and didn't go to the cemetery right away.