Are you going to hyphen your name?

Question

Are you going to hyphen your name when you get married?
Why or why not?

This question does not apply to me...
I am married with children and we all have the same last name.

Answer 1

I almost decided to keep my own. For the same reason as Lisa said: I worked very hard to get where I am. I am a doctor and I am staying/opening a practice in my home community. I always thought that I would want to keep everything as is...especially for my business.

At least, that is what I thought until my husband-to-be came back into my life. He completely swept me off of my feet and I want to feel as much like a wife that I can and share everything with him. I am going to name my practice after my maiden name, but I will be "Dr. Hislastname".

The same thing goes for a prenup...I always thought that I would have my "future husband" sign one, but I can't imagine having my fiance sign that...some might think that it is stupid to not sign one after years and years of school and opening up a practice, but I can't imagine starting a marriage that way.

Answer 2

I am married, I use my maiden name for business. I worked hard for my career and feel proud of that and I didn't want to change it. He uses his for business but to the church we are the mine-his family. To the school we are his.

If I had been married before I had established my career I would have taken his name and that would have been it but as I got older I got an amazing independent streak and we are both happy with that.

He says to me that he never expects me to abandon who I am and that my new name (mine-his) shows that we add to each others lives.

By the way, I am now a stay at home mom who runs her business from home and I still feel the same way about my name. I have and will continue to do it proud.

We are a hyphen family, my kids use mine-his. This is not that unusual around here in New England. My married Reverend and family are hyphens as well as my Aunt and Uncle and their kids.

Answer 3

Yes. My mother also hyphenated hers, so it is part tradition for me, but I also am proud of my name and my heritage and do not want to lose that....and I also already have a very long name, so I figured a hyphen and 7 more letters wouldn't hurt! :)

I am going to use the full hyphenated name legaly, but socially be Mrs.husbands last name.

Answer 4

i did. I did the hypen because

a. I have a son who is not my husbands child. he has my madien name and i didn't want to drop it and then he's all alone in the name department. my 2 daughters and my step daughter both have my husbands last name. I didn't want my son to feel abandoned by me changing my name completely on him.

2. up until this past july, I was under the impression that i was my fathers only daughter. I have 5 brothers.... and a 28 year old sister that none of us.... including my dad found out about until this summer. So i wanted to keep my daddy's name. he gave this to me and it's special.

so i just added my married name so i can be able to represent the 3 most important men in my life. my husband, my son and my dad

last. there was also the matter of my home and business. all this was aquired before i got married and i didn't want to go thru the hassel of having everything changed.

Answer 5

Actually, when I get married, I am adamant about keeping my last name. If I end up adopting kids (I cannot have any of my own), they will have his last name, only because my name will not hyphenate well.

Answer 6

No because I would have had an 18 letter, 8 syllable last name! I did have fun teasing my father in law telling him I was going to hyphenate. He didn't realize I was joking at first.

Answer 7

Personally, I think that there are many more cons than pros when having a hyphenated name:

1) Let's say a person hyphenates and becomes Smith-Jones. Do you call her Mrs. Smith, Mrs. Jones, or Mrs. Smith-Jones? The later one is a mouthful, and the other two are confusing if that is not really the last name. It further adds to the confusion if she is known by "Mrs. Jones" to her church friends, "Mrs. Smith" to her work friends, "Mrs. Smith-Jones" to her banker, etc.

2) So Mrs. Smith-Jones has a child and names her Sally Smith-Jones. Sally Smith-Jones gets married later on and decides to hyphenate. So now Sally Smith-Jones becomes Sally Smith-Jones-Anderson. Where does the madness end?

3) Mrs. Smith-Jones has a child and just names her Sally Jones. Having minor children with a different last name than the parents is harder than if they all have the same name.

4) Mrs. Smith-Jones has an elderly relative who does not believe in the hyphenation fad. So, she sends a check as a holiday gift to Mrs. Jones. Now, Mrs. Jones has to go to the bank in person, provide a copy of her marriage certificate and driver's license to deposit the check into Mrs. Smith-Jones's account.

5) Mrs. Smith-Jones's HR department at work hates her because on some HR documents she is Mrs. Smith, on others Mrs. Jones, and on others still she is listed as Mrs. Smith-Jones. In addition, the HR computer database does not recognize a hyphen, so add Mrs. Smithjones as a last name.

6) Signing loan paperwork...long names are a curse

7) Now, I am not saying that the wife has to take the husband's name; the husband can take the wife's, or they can combine into ONE new last name : Jonth (from Jones and Smith). The point of being married is to start a new family, a new team. Everyone in that immediate team shares the new team name.

8) "But I am recognized professionally by my name". Then don't change it. Or, recognize that when you hyphenate, you ARE changing your last name to something different.

Signed,
Mrs. Axxxxxxx, not Mrs. Bxxxx-Axxxx

Answer 8

I don't have anything against people who do hyphenate their names, but I'm not going to myself. Its just easier to use his name (which is also easier to spell). I guess if I was famous or something and name recognition was really important I would hyphenate.

Answer 9

I think you need to make a decision one way or the other. Want to keep your maiden name? Fine. Want to adopt your husban's last name? Fine. But hyphenting is weak and wishy-washy. As an example, a woman hyphenates her name to Rebecca Williams-McKinley. Her daughter, Samantha Williams-McKinley meets Bernard Koslowski-Birmingham, so when Samantha marries she becomes Samantha Williams-McKinley-Koslowski-Birmingham. And the the next generation.... Come on, just make a deicsion, people!

Answer 10

It's a strong possibility that I am not going to hyphen my name. I figure, I am starting a new life, so why not make some drastic changes.