last week my MIL and i got into an argument. me and her do not get along at all. she hates me and my daughter (from previous relationship). she says she hates me cause i lied to her. me and my husband are seperated at the moment for certain issues , but thankfully we are working things out. i was suppose to move back into my home last month, but my husband did not pay the rent, to get back at me for leaving, so we got evicted, there for i had no place to go. i told my MIL that i was moving back and having the baby over there back in June. (i moved 7 hours away after the seperation)
okay i lost my home there for i had no place to live so me and my husband decided that i stay here and he would move over here. when i tried to explain that to my MIL she said that wasnt her problem and the fact was that i lied to her and she will hate me for it.
Well during this fight she told me that it was my fault that i got pregnant ( you know since only women are involved in conceiving)...CONT..
2007-09-14 10:03:52 · 14 answers · asked by Becky 3 in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Parenting
she said that now because of me, her son has to support me, my daughter, and now a baby. i told her that i dont need her son to support me and my daughter but he will support his son.
she told me that she could care less what happens to me or my daughter but that i was going to let her see her grandson when she saw fit. then she told me that i should have taken care of the pregnancy when me and my husband found out.
then this b i t ch has the balls to tell me that im not a good mother, that i could barely support myself and my daughter how was i going to do it with a new baby. that i was staying with my parents with one bastard child (my daughter) and then i was about to have another one, that she didnt know how my parents allowed that.
ummm sorry that my parents are supportive and loving and willing to help me.
i have already made arrangement to not have her in the delivery room or recovery room, and to have the baby not put on display at the nursery, so she wont see him.
2007-09-14 10:09:07 · update #1
is this too much or should i do more?
i dont want anything to do with her or her to do anything with my son but my husband gets mad and says that i have no right to keep HIS son away from his mother, even though he knows what she said. he says that he cant say anything to her.
2007-09-14 10:11:52 · update #2
first and foremost when she started running her mouth about my daughter old or not she wouldve had an *** whopin, second thingi everything you are doing willnot work, dont know what state that you live in but grand parents do have legal rights, my own mother tried some similar sh-t, when my daughter was born and while she was growing up. but Im a fighter and we had plenty to say to eachother. your husband needs to grow some ba--s. and not let his mother control his life if thats what you are looking forward to GET OUT WHILE THE GETTING IS GOOD. take him to the bank and make sure that you have witness's to the fact that your mil is hostile. youll need it if any legal actions are taken . be careful, take care of yourself and your daughter first.
2007-09-14 10:28:03 · answer #1 · answered by jay m 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
You need to take a step back (since she probably wont) and let things cool off. I would write her a letter telling her exactly how she made you feel when she said those horrible things about you and your children. Also let her know that she will see YOUR child when you see fit, not when she decides. I would advise you against completely taking your son away from her just by what she said, simply because your husband doesn't completely support your decision to keep your child from her. Since your relationship is still on the mend this could be a deal breaker and if he leaves and has visitation you will have no say in who gets to see the baby and it wont be on your terms anymore. Instead try to be civil towards her and let things play out slowly. If she continues to say things like this in front of your child after he is born then by all means take him away and don't let her see him. If you and your husband separated you would have just cause request that your child not be seen by, because it could be damaging to him. I know how hard this must be for you, but in the end you will be the better person.
2007-09-14 10:26:10 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
As far as making sure she doesn't see your son at the hospital you have done all you can do. As for everything else.... I wouldn't stress. Right now you need to focus on fixing things with your husband (it sounds like that is what you want to do). Your MIL was way out of line with the you should have taken care of it comment. I know my boyfriends mother can be kind of "opinionated" (for lack of a better word) like that but I just let it roll of my shoulders. You don't need that kind of stress and if your husband cannot understand that then it is time for you two to have a real heart to heart about your future together. Good Luck.
2007-09-14 10:19:42 · answer #3 · answered by Jen 3 · 2⤊ 0⤋
You didn't say what you lied to her about but that's beside the point. Tell your husband the things she is saying to you and that when you two get back together you don't want her seeing the baby. She's not the mother or the father of that baby and she has no right to demand to see it whenever she wishes. You don't have to talk to her and you don't have to let her see the baby at all. If she goes psycho on you get a restraining order.
2007-09-14 10:14:35 · answer #4 · answered by Cinderelly 3 · 3⤊ 0⤋
honestly when she calls do not answer when she is visiting do not speak to her. be the bigger person. honestly she has some little issue with herself, and you know that when you and your hubby were seperated he said things about you to her that now makes a relationship with her impossible for her to deal with. but living 7 hours away is a good cure for her she will have to call first to come to visit and that it self is precious. about the baby involved let her see him but on your time and at our home not letting him go weekends with her or stuff like that. you have the right to say no.
2007-09-14 10:23:57 · answer #5 · answered by butterflygirl249 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I think that the MIL needs to step back. All of this is between you and your hubby. What ever issues the MIL has are hers and she needs to work them out and deal with them. You need to focus on your marriage and you need to talk to your DH about everything. I would cease all contact with the MIL-its too stressful for you and the baby.
2007-09-14 10:08:44 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 6⤊ 0⤋
Honey you like help with your anorexia to start with. communicate over with a psychiatrist approximately that AND your mom. as a great way by way of fact the being pregnant, there's no uncomplicated thank you to tell her. tell her which you had intercourse yet remind her which you're on delivery administration and your significant other used a condom (if he did, do not lie if he did not) so which you weren't being careless and did not advise for this to happen, yet, you're pregnant. tell her you like her and are scared and can't try this by myself. I strongly disagree with the abortion. With help, you are able to benefit adequate weight to be of favourite weight and get some nutrition into you, which you like for your self in spite of the being pregnant besides. i don't think of your mom might want you to get an abortion. She's a mom with a newborn who she loves. She does not think of of aborting you, and could probably see a destiny for you with the toddler. She ought to help you shield it too. Please don't get an abortion. in case your relative is a choose too, he/she ought to do lots to make helpful the toddler is located with a to blame, financially in a position relative or a reliable adoptive homestead too. you do not could kill your toddler. provide your son or daughter a great gamble to stay and make pals and flow to college and have relationships and stay the existence which you have lived...it incredibly is the flaw in "professional-selection". the mummy gets the alternative, not the toddler, who might desire to stay it incredibly is existence. reliable luck in regardless of you opt for to do in spite of the incontrovertible fact that, and get help for your self as properly.
2016-10-08 21:07:48 · answer #7 · answered by shams 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Simple. Remove yourself from unhealthy situations. You have to draw boundaries to keep yourself and children happy and healthy. Your husband should do the same. Children first.
2007-09-14 10:41:38 · answer #8 · answered by quirky 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Tell your MIL to mind her own buisness
2007-09-14 10:18:46 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 3⤊ 0⤋
Don't stress remember you're pregnant!! Just tell the ***** to back off!!
2007-09-14 11:18:09 · answer #10 · answered by ? 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋