My boyfriend wants to be a cop?

Question

My boyfriend of one year has decided that he wants to be a state trooper (we live in Alaska). He will basically be able to stay at home for a year, until training starts. Then for more than a year he will be in training in a different city. After that they will probably be relocating him to a village that will probably be too hard to get to to visit him. At this point, we are in a very serious relationship and are pretty sure we will be getting married after he spends a couple years in the village (because then he can move back to the city).

My question is, have any of you dealt with something similar? Or how would you deal with this? Also, does anyone know how dangerous this job is? I am kind of worried about him! Any reassurance from police officers or troopers would be nice too!

Answer 1

Two concerns, first of all, being low in seniority, he will basically get an assignment no one else wants. I went through the WI State Patrol Academy, and assignments were based on class grades, since we all had the same seniority. Hopefully AK is similar, and good grades can help. Secondly, and of most concern, back up is far away in AK. I saw a job posting for Barrows that stated back up was more than a day away. The bright side... AK probably has a pretty low rate of assaults on officers.

Answer 2

I am a police officer in London and can tell you honestly that it can be risky but it is also a really rewarding job. There is an indescribable feeling to helping someone in need or stopping someone dangerous from causing others more harm.
As perro.faldero already said it is important that your fiance knows exactly how you feel about this. The only way to really keep a relationship going in any walk of life is through honesty with your partner. I wish you both all the best for the future and wish your boyfriend a long, safe and enjoyable time in the force.

Answer 3

My brother is on his second law-enforcement career (state highway patrol and now captain in the local county sherriff's office - he basically runs the jail), my uncle was a highway patrolman, my nephew is a cop in a big city, and now my son wants to be a cop, so I think it's in our blood or something.

I don't want my son to be a cop because a) it's dangerous but that's the selfish part of me - someone has to do it, but more importantly b) I don't think's he's doing it for the right reasons - he's all about the testosterone power thing, not about helping people. He's 18, so still a baby if you ask me, and I have plenty of evidence that his brain is not mature! I'm working on him and hoping he'll change either his mind or his mindset.

Of course it's dangerous, but it depends upon a lot of things (general crime rate, funding levels for proper equipment and training, ratio of law enforcement per capita, sometimes terrain, and even the skill of your partner, etc.)

You probably need to get some advice from a cop's wife vs. a cop for the questions that are troubling your heart.

Answer 4

i am a cop and i had to do just about the same thing... i live in a little town in Maine, and my girlfriend didnt want me to be gone from home so much but i really wanted to be a cop so i went to a college (for like 3 .. well only 2 1/2 .. years) in a big city (portland .. ok not really that big .. but if u live where i do .. ITS BIG!!) but then i became a highway patrol officer and i see my girlfriend (of like 4 1/2 years now) every day and its nothing different than any other job except it is a little more dangerous than other jobs .. a police officer isnst even in the top 10 most dangorous jobs. so it is a little dangorous but not too bad... the most danjorous thing i have done in my career of a cop is .. i hav gotten into a high speed police chase and only going at like 75 MPH.. but i am a highway patrol officer whitch ppl go faster on highways so yea..

Answer 5

My fiance is a police officer and I won't lie, it can be a very dangerous job. He has been in many a risky situation. However, he works in London which is a very dangerous city. I could be wrong but can't imagine that Alaska is as dangerous!

I do worry about him but I also trust that he prioritises his own life above everything else. He would never willingly put himself in danger. If you sit down with your partner and tell him you are worried for his safety, I'm sure he will tell you the same thing.

As much as many people dislike police officers, the majority of them are good guys and gals who want to try and get justice for those who are victims.

If you would like me to answer any questions, do e-mail me.

Answer 6

An alaska state trooper is a great job.

The responsibilities are varied and interesting, and not particularly dangerous:

1 reduce the impact of drugs and alcohol on communities through statewide drug and alcohol enforcement;
2 provide professional, effective and efficient statewide major crime investigations;
3 provide prompt professional proactive and reactive rural public safety services;
4 protect our State's fish and wildlife resources through enforcement programs;
5 enhance public safety through highway traffic enforcement and education;
6 provide quality statewide training.

According to Federal statistics there are more murders committed in Camden NJ than in the STATE of Alaska. Populations being similar in size.

So really this is more about dealing with your anxiety about him becoming a cop, and less about him being a cop.

If you're the "worrying" type, you're likely not going to like anything he does. He would have a 20times likely chance of dying being a commercial fisherman than he would as a cop, but that's just statistics.

If you're not the "worrying" type, it's more about what the job has to offer vs. the initial deprivation of your relationship.

Look, if you're serious and you love him support his efforts he'll only love you more. If you're worried about "what's in it for me", I suggest you cut him free. Being a law enforcement officer is a rewarding job, but the hours are long, and it takes alot of dedication.

Answer 7

Yes, 3 years of separation he was in the Army stateside and overseas just as much stress too. We wrote real letters, occasionally talked on the phone it was expensive and neither of us had the money, he came home occasionally.
Mail is good we hashed out a lot of stuff about likes and dislikes, kids, etc. We did date other people during this time to make sure this was the real thing.
After that we got engaged and married its been over 20 years so I guess absence does make the heart grow fonder.

Answer 8

there are a number of risky professions. on an analogous time as police officer is severe on the checklist, it quite is far from the main deadly. And, it easily relies upon on the place he works. Many neighborhoods are crammed with police who've never even had to tug out their weapons. that's not all like "law enforcement officials." That being mentioned, a million) why do no longer you like him to alter? you like him to proceed to slack off? precisely what variety of existence could that be? he will circulate from McJob to McJob and not in any respect earn sufficient to have a great existence? 2) being a police officer demands somebody with motivation who can artwork on their very own without supervision. It would not sound like he has a danger at starting to be a police officer, so which you have no longer have been given lots to fret approximately. .

Answer 9

Based on everybody I know that has become a cop or dated/been married to people that have become cops you are screwed. Run the other way. Most guys are great going into academy and the academy ruins them, churning out as*h*oles. They usually cheat, lie, and become total jerks that worship themselves and how good they look in uniform. I know this isn't what you wanted to hear, but I know several people that this has happened to, and would never have believed that the guys would change so much. They say the academy makes them pompous to keep them safe and able to come home at night. I guess the guys just let it get to their head about women and men in uniform.
Its your life, but heed my warning!

Answer 10

the best thing is to let him become what he wants...and to answer the part of it being dangerous..it depends on what his duties will be..because some have office jobs and some do patrol others do undercover work..it's all up to him. I'm sure that if you two are in love that both of you will find a way around the distance....Good luck and best of wishes to both of you