Why is it acceptable for women to be attracted to men because of their money/jobs?

Question

But "superficial" and "shallow" for men to be attracted to women for their looks?

I mean, how often do you see a female doctor marrying a male nurse? I couldn't care less how much a woman earns or what she does as a job - all I care about is if she's pretty and sweet. Sorry!

why can't we just accept that men & women are attracted to different things?

Answer 1

no no....thats perfectly normal.

neither is a sure thing on a compatible life long future together.

consider that during more uncivilized times....a woman needs a man to be able to care for her and their possible offspring.

the men are looking for a woman who is desirable and would make a good mother and homemaker.

just because more women work these days, doesnt change the natural instinctual selection process.

Answer 2

Why ask why? Why not say, "who cares".

Seriously, if I'm attracted to a woman because she is "attractive" I am simply acting in accordance with my nature. If anyone other than her have a problem with it, they can kiss my butt. It isn't illegal, and it's perfectly natural. Women are attracted to men who can provide. This is a basic and natural instinct. If it means that he can provide money, great. I don't mind being called shallow for being attracted to attractive women. I should point out that people accusing men of being shallow for that reason are generally busted women who have not been dealt such a generous hand in life.

NOBODY is ever purely attracted to a member of the opposite sex purely on their personality. We are like any other animal on Earth and are attracted to the fittest and most appealing members of the opposite sex. While a long term relationship always calls for more than looks, looks are what is going to get your attention in the first place.

So, to all those busted people out there who say "what about me and my charming personality?", I say "tough luck". My fiancee is both witty and beautiful. The women I dated before her were generally also intelligent, and ALL of them were very attractive. I feel no shame in that. Why would anyone be attracted to someone who is not attractive? It seems to be pretty self evident.

Answer 3

Men and women often look for different things in a relationship. If both are looking to a long-term relationship, marriage, and eventually a family, then men and women want differing things, because they assume different roles. It isn't necessary for you to take on any particular role, but if you don't mind being a wage-earner, and leaving the primary responsibility of raising the children to your wife, then it is reasonable that you would want the smartest, prettiest, happiest person in the world to take the responsibility of training your children. Conversely, she would want someone very secure, well respected, and likely to provide a good financial base for her children.
If these are your values, then the result would be great.
If, however, she is expecting to be a wage-earner, and you are expecting merely a sex partner, then you might want to look at another type of relationship.
Every couple is unique, as each of us are. But traditionally men "bring home the bacon," and women "cook it up."
My wife never worked outside our home--I did. She raised the kids. This was the relationship we each sought. She was attracted to me because she viewed me as a good supporter. I was attracted to her because she would make a great mother to my children. For us, this worked. Was it superficial or shallow? Neither of us thought so--nor do we think so now, after 29-years of marriage and eight happy children. But not all couples see things this way. You have to figure out what you want, and she has to figure out what she wants. Then if those wants can pair up--great! If not, there will be problems.
No one ever called me shallow because I married a beautiful girl. I never remember anyone calling my wife shallow because she married me for my ability to support our family. For us, this "traditional" marriage worked.
I can't say what will work for you. But, figure out what you really want--and then find someone that can provide that to you as a partner.

Answer 4

Um, its not superficial to be attracted to someone for their looks. But if that is the only reason you are with them then it is superficial.
People only get together because they are attracted to the way each other look at the beginning. You would hardly go and ask someone out that you didn't find attractive!!
Men presume (most of them anyway) that when women get married and have babies, that they will not work. Therefore it is in our best interest to land someone who is able to cater for our shopping habits.
Its just common sense really.

Answer 5

HUH!! Everyone is different about what they find attractive and unattractive. How can you generalize that!!

For me the most attractive attributes on a man are:
My first impression (HIS LOOKS),
The way he carry's himself (HIS CONFIDENCE)
The way he talks to me
His intellectual banter

So DUH... you have to have a chemistry there before you even get to the other things. I think people should admit that instead of generalizing.

Men that get called shallow and superficial.... they are the ones who don't ever get PAST the looks. Have you ever met someone that you didn't find that attractive at first... but after you spent a lot of time with them you found them very attractive? If not... that is why you were called shallow.

Answer 6

It's not acceptable for women to go after money/jobs. I think it's a stupid double standard if you really want something you should go out and work to get it or do it yourself whether you are man or woman.

Most people go for physical attraction before getting to know someone that's not superficial it's human nature.

Answer 7

Its not acceptable for women to be attracted to men because of their money or jobs. Haven't you ever heard of women like this being called Gold Diggers..its just as socially unacceptable as men being attracted to a woman solely based on looks.

Answer 8

I don't think it's superficial to be attracted to a woman because of her looks.
It's acceptable to be attracted to a man because of his money/job because then he will be able to take care of her. Money is a big issue in relationships, so picking someone who can support themselves is a much easier route. Relationships are hard enough without being broke all the time.

Answer 9

not all women are that way any more then all men marry women for their looks, if you are that way then all you are is a very sHallow hal and the same goes for the females that are that way

Answer 10

it's done, but it's not acceptable. If someone thought it was I wouldn't want to be friends with them or know them in any way, shape, or form. It's not the person I am or want to be around. Those lazy women give the rest of us a bad name!!!