An Italian, an Irishman and a Chinese fellow are hired at a construction site. The foreman points to a huge pile of sand and says to the Italian guy, "You're in charge of sweeping." To the Irishman he says "You're in charge of shoveling." To the Chinese guy, "You're in charge of supplies." He then says, "Now, I have to leave for a little while. I expect you guys to make a dent in that there pile." So the foreman goes away for a couple hours, but when he returns the pile of sand is untouched. He says to the Italian: "Why didn't you sweep any of it?" The Italian replies in a heavy accent, "I no gotta broom, an' you tella me dat de Chinese'a guy supposa bringa da supplies, but he disappear and I no finda him." Then the foreman turns to the Irishman and asks why he didn't shovel. The Irishman replies in his heavy brogue, "Aye, that ye did, but I couldn't get meself a shovel. Ye left the Chinese fella in charge of supplies, but I couldn't fin' him."
2007-09-13 23:08:56 · 9 answers · asked by Anonymous in Entertainment & Music ➔ Jokes & Riddles
The foreman is really angry now, and storms off looking for the Chinese guy. He can't find him anywhere and is getting angrier by the minute. Just then, the Chinese guy springs out from behind the pile of sand and yells... "Supplies!!"
- A Blonde was down on her luck. In order to raise some money, she decided to kidnap a kid and hold him for ransom. She went to the playground, grabbed a kid, took him behind a tree, and told him, "I've kidnapped you." She then wrote a note saying, I've kidnapped your kid. Tomorrow morning, put $10,000 in a paper bag and put it under the pecan tree next to the slide on the north side of the playground. Signed, A Blonde". The Blonde then pinned the note to the kid's shirt and sent him home to show it to his parents. The next morning the Blonde checked, and sure enough, a paper bag was sitting beneath the pecan tree. The Blonde opened up the bag and found the $10,000 with a note that said, How could you do this to a fellow Blonde!
2007-09-13 23:11:54 · update #1
After years of frustration, the Smiths had no children and decided to use a proxy father to start their family. On the day the proxy father was to arrive, Mr. Smith kissed his wife and said, "I'm off. The man should be here soon". Half an hour later, just by chance, a door-to-door baby photographer rang the doorbell, hoping to make a sale. "Good morning madam. You don't know me, but I've come to..." "Oh, no need to explain. I've been expecting you," Mrs. Smith cut in. "Really?" the photographer asked. "Well, good! I've made a specialty of babies." "That's what my husband and I had hoped. Please come in and have a seat. Just where do we start?" asked Mrs. Smith, blushing. "Leave everything to me. I usually try two in the bathtub, one on the couch and perhaps a couple on the bed. Sometimes the living room floor is fun too; you can really spread out." "Bathtub, living room floor? No wonder it didn't work for Harry and me." "Well, madam, none of us can guarantee a good one every time.
2007-09-13 23:13:25 · update #2
But if we try several different positions and I shoot from six or seven angles, I'm sure you'll be pleased with the results." "I hope we can get this over with quickly," gasped Mrs. Smith. "Madam, in my line of work, a man must take his time. I'd love to be in and out in five minutes, but you'd be disappointed with that, I'm sure." "Don't I know it!!" Mrs. Smith exclaimed. The photographer opened his briefcase and pulled out a portfolio of his baby pictures. "This was done on the top of a bus in downtown London." "Oh my god!!", Mrs. Smith exclaimed, tugging at her handkerchief. "And these twins turned out exceptionally well when you consider their mother was so difficult to work with." The photographer handed Mrs. Smith the picture. "She was difficult?" asked Mrs. Smith. "Yes, I'm afraid so. I finally had to take her to Hyde Park to get the job done right.
2007-09-13 23:14:51 · update #3
People were crowding around four and five deep, pushing to get a good look." "Four and five deep?" asked Mrs. Smith, eyes widened in amazement. "Yes", the photographer said. "And for more than three hours, too. The mother was constantly squealing and yelling. I could hardly concentrate. Then darkness approached and I began to rush my shots. Finally, when the squirrels began nibbling on my equipment, I just packed it all in." Mrs. Smith leaned forward. "You mean they actually chewed on your, eh...equipment?" "That's right. Well madam, if you're ready, I'll set up my tripod so that we can get to work." "Tripod??" Mrs. Smith looked extremely worried now. "Oh yes, I have to use a tripod to rest my Canon on. It's much too big for me to hold while I'm getting ready for action. Madam? Madam? ... Good Lord, she's fainted!!"
2007-09-13 23:15:12 · update #4
HA HA HA HA HA!!!
i luv it, star!!!
2007-09-13 23:20:29 · answer #1 · answered by Amy 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The foreman asked the Chinese" why didn`t you do anything ?" Answered the Chinese
"How can I supply sand bags to mason when these two are so lazy ?"
You gave additional details after I answered.
Anyway good joke , thanks
2007-09-14 06:19:38 · answer #2 · answered by J.SWAMY I ఇ జ స్వామి 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i cried i laughed so hard about the Chinese guy!!! that was HILARIOUS!!!! my fiance was playing his x-box while i was telling him this and he stopped the game and told everyone the joke! LOL!!! thanks for the giggle
2007-09-14 06:23:21 · answer #3 · answered by short_n_sweet70301 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Ha Ha! Funny!
2007-09-14 07:44:06 · answer #4 · answered by cats 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
LOL! Good stuff!
2007-09-14 06:59:56 · answer #5 · answered by Who's That Girl? 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
oh my gosh LOL!
2007-09-14 06:11:11 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
That is Great!!!!!
2007-09-14 06:29:02 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
haha!!!! lol
corny
2007-09-14 06:14:05 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
i don't get it
2007-09-14 06:12:14 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋