How do I tell my mom that she is being too soft on my brother?

Question

I was raised very diffrent from my brother( whome is younger than me). I was taught to be responsible and independent, but my brother has always gotten away with murder. Dont get me wrong, I prefer being the responsible one, but, this time its gone too far and I need to speak up. The way my mom raises my brother, whome is now 19, is actaully crippling him in life.

She does everything for him, she even quit his job for him! I dont want to critisize her parenting, since I love her dearly and she is extremely sensitive. How do I tell her that she's doing the wrong thing, without hurting her feelings, or is it not my place to say??

Answer 1

tell your mother whatever you have writen in here. since you are just concerned about yoru bro, she shouldnt take you in a wrong way.have a talk with her instead of trying things to make her realise that she is wrong. if she doesnt agree with you then dont worry coz you did what you felt right.

Answer 2

I take it your parents are divorced. This is a common occurrence when there is no male influence in the home. he never learned to be a MAN. he's still a little boy, and like all mothers she wants to protect her child. You should let you mother know that she needs to stop treating him like a Boy and start treating him like a man. Other wise he's going to end up 35 in her basement talking to gerbils called Brittany. He needs to start learning how to be a man and how to function in life. If you have to do it, then take the responsibility and do it. But your mother needs to understand that keeping him a boy will not help him become what he needs to become. and that's a man. Good luck.

Answer 3

Your mom will not listen to you as your suggestions will be treated as sibling rivalry even though you mean well to your brother.

Either take help from a family friend who is your mom's age and qualified enough to advice her, or leave the things as they are and just focus on making your own life meaningful and worthy. Let time teach the lessons of reality to your mother and your brother.

Answer 4

Its not your place to say anything to your mother. For whatever reason sometimes women do this with their baby son's. And you are absolutely right, its crippling to them. Not to mention they have nothing but trouble in jobs and relationships because they never get the message that no one have to love them that way but mom and the real world is unfair and sometimes mean. That's what keeps the rest of us grounded in reality.

If it were me I wouldn't say a word. If your brother hasn't balked at this kind of behavior from your mom then you don't stand a chance.

Answer 5

Talk to your brother. You are his older sister. Let him know your mother is not helping him even though that is her intention. Let him know it is time for him to grow up, take responsibility and be a man, or he will be 40 years old, still living with "mom." Let him understand how difficult that will be if he ever wants to have a sexual relationship.

Answer 6

You may not probably tell your mother how to behave with her son but you can certainly tell her that how do you feel. Tell her that a mother is supposed to be a girl's best friend and you are opening up to her as a friend. This with open up a new path in your relation with you mom.