Who Pays When Going To A Resturant... ???

Question

In recently came to america... this is my 6th month here...

in my culture when i go out to eat with friends... 1 person pays for everyone... but in america ive noticed... that there are separate bills....

do friends usually pay only for themselves? what about really really really good friends (not dates just friends)?

in what case would u pay the whole bill?

would it be awkward if i were pay for just a regular friend?

is this a suggestive act in america? would it be considered to be gay?

is there a way to say let me take u out for..... to a friend so they wont think ur gay? would it be a nice gesture or would u be creaped out?

Answer 1

Usually if it is just a get together, then everyone pays for him/her self. However, if you ask a friend to meet you, you may pay for both. It isn't seen as gay, at least where I live. It would probably be that person's turn to pay the next time.

Answer 2

In my culture, if somebody has a birthday, that person pays for the whole thing. The birthday celebrant treats everyone. But here in America, if somebody has a birthday, the friends pay for the bill.... the friends cheap in... they don't let the celebrant pay for anything... sometimes, they separate the bills too.

Most of the time, when we go out, we pay for our own bill... we pay whatever we order plus the tax and then the tip. when the two friends are really really close, they can ask each other out that the other one can pay the bill...

in what case would i pay the whole bill? that's a good question. in our culture coz I am a filipino, if it's somebody's treat for some reason or birthday, he pays the whole bill... I haven't had any experience with my other friends (mixed races) and then somebody paid for the whole bill. We are always cheaping in...

i don't think that's awkward if you pay for a regular friend... that's okay and then make sure you explain the situation why you pay for his bill, bla bla...

gay? if you're in san francisco... just kidding! no i don't think so... as long as the person is open minded why not!?

Answer 3

In general, people tend to pay for themselves unless someone offers to get the check. My best friend and I do that all the time. Sometimes, if we're at a place where it's difficult to split the check, we'll take turns paying the bill. The case where you would pay the whole bill is if you personally invite people out to celebrate something or something a little bit more formal like that. It's not creepy to take a friend out for a meal. It's just a good gesture of friendship.

Answer 4

well there's different situations for everything. if you would like to pay for your friend just say the bill is on me this time, then let them either accept it and offer to pick up the tab some other time or not. some people aren't confortable with doing that for some reason or another, but to each his own. If it's a fairly big party usually people will share the bill unless it was understood before they went out it was going to be payed by only one person.
being a girl, I always let the guy pay for me unless they let me pick it up every once in a while. some guys have a problem with that because they dont think it's right for the girl to pay but then again everyone's different.
If you think whoever you take out, or go out with has a question about who pays or if you have a question for them, just dont be shy ask.
hope that helps, have fun here in america.

Answer 5

In general the one who does the inviting pays the bill. If it's a group of friends then it's usually split.

There are times when there's an invitation but the bill is still split, usually in cases where you really don't the person. Something like "let's do lunch" or "do you want to get coffee?", the tone implies that you are both going to pay.

If you're unsure you can just discuss it before so there are no surprises.

Answer 6

You need to take the whole gay thing out of this question. It has nothing to do with it. It is really proper etiquette. If you invite someone or a group of someones to dinner or a night out, you made the invitation so you should rightly pay. If you and a friend or a group of friends decided to go out together you can choose if you want pay separately or all together. What my friends do is we split the bill evenly and on special occasions someone usually pays it all.

Answer 7

if there is a big group, everyone usually pays for themselves. even if you are with a great friend, the bill is usually split. it would be a really kind ggesture if you payed for everyone, not weird.

if two guys go out for a lunch, its not considered gay if you are mature and realize that its just friends, duhh.

this may allso sound sexist, but in america two girls at lunch together would look less gay then two guys.

i say, if you want to take your friend to lunch, just ask them to lunch. you wont be considered gayy. :)

Answer 8

It all depends to a way a person was rasied. In my family whoever invites, it is understood that is the person that will be paying. Also if a group of friends all agree to get soemthing to eat togeteher then, it is pretty much understood that everyone will pay their own way. But if you would like to take your friend for dinner (boy or girl) just tell them that you are inviting them to dinner, but it helps if you have a reason as to why you are buying them dinner, or just decide with your friend that you all will have dinner once a month and you will take turns paying.

Answer 9

The bill is split if there is an agreement beforehand. Tell the waiter to write separate bills.
If you ask someone out, make it clear from the beginning, by saying something like.."I'd love you to try this restaurant with me, my treat".
Sometimes you might want to pay one time and he will say that he'll catch it the next.
Its not suggestive or gay. Unless you take him to a candlelit restaurant with strolling violinists.

Answer 10

The reason friend will each pay for their own is because it cost a lot to pay for a bunch of people.

If you want to pay for a friend you don't need to ask before you go out. If you want to pay for both you can tell the waiter / waitress to give you the bill. Or just tell your friend.."I've got it." (Meaning you'll pay for it.

You won't be thought of as gay. Most people (especially friend) pay for there own so no one person has to pay.