O.k as you can see i'm african american and there is this cacusian girl at my school that i have lunch with on certain days. i know where her locker and stuff like that. We talked a couple times and things like that. just havent asked for her number just yet how long should i wait to do this. but the real reason that this paragraph has come up is that my some of my friends are african american and just the other day one of my friends came up to me and said you like that white girl so i'm like o.k thats rude so i said yeah and she walked off. so i catch back up with her and i say what was that all about but still no answer. should i forget about my friends for that one girl that i'm tripping over. or stick with the crew
2007-09-13 08:03:20 · 28 answers · asked by I EAT M&M'S#18 YUMMY 3 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
i dated an african american guy for 4 years, and it definitely wasn't easy. He constantly had people sayin crap to him about me bein white and to me about his race...if you want this girl, go for it..forget what people think, i didn't care and neither did he...if your friends care about you they wont care about who you date...good luck!
2007-09-13 08:08:03 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
It doesn't have to be a choice between this girl and your friends. You're not even dating this girl yet and if you do, perhaps your friends would accept her. It's disappointing to hear how easily you'd drop your friends. I wonder if the girl in your group has a crush on you. It's ok if she does. I've said this in another answer the other day, but I'll repeat: there are 4 African-American women to each African-American man. Half of those men are somewhere in the judicial system, so that's 8 to 1 of men who are potentially available to African-American women. Of course it's fine to like, date, marry a girl outside your race. It's awsome when two people like each other for the right reasons and have the best of intentions towards each other. Your friend may simply be reacting in fear to the statistics- not remembering that you're kids and that this doesn't mean that you'll be any less available to an African-American woman (or even to her) in the future. Of course, she may simply be prejudiced. You have to deal with this. This is life. You're not a little boy anymore. Remind her that most African-Americans are also part Caucasian. Not many families have pure African genetics- including hers, including yours!
2007-09-13 15:25:05 · answer #2 · answered by Lovey 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Really, you need to make this decision for yourself. If you really feel like there is potential for you and this girl, I think you should go for it. If your friends are true friends, they will respect your decision and want to see you happy. If not, then you are better off without them anyway.
On the other hand, if you don't really think the relationship has that much potential as of yet (it sounds as though you don't know her all THAT well), then I think you two need to spend some more time getting to know each other before committing to anything.
Maybe just some casual dating? Maybe invite her to hang out with you and your friends?
You have lots of options, but the choice is ultimately yours and yours alone!
Good luck! =)
2007-09-13 15:09:15 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think you've got to let your heart tell you what you think you want to do.
We live in a "free" society, but the cultural habits of people still seem to tie things up when it comes to being with people we care about.
If you really like the girl you're getting to know, ask her if you can call her, and if she'd like to call and talk with you.
If it bothers you more to have your crew maybe be down at you for seeing or calling someone who's not your race, then that's a question you really need to think about.
What's more important? What means more? It takes courage to challenge what your friends believe--is it worth it to you?
What do you really want?
I can't answer for you, but I can at least give you some more questions....
2007-09-13 15:20:14 · answer #4 · answered by Palmerpath 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well race really shouldn't matter for anything. Not for friends, family, or any kind of stuff. Look, the only thing i can honestly tell you is that if you think that she's really diggin you and you really like her then go ahead. All's fair in love and war, people need to accept that you have other friends and stuff and if people are going to judge you or look at you differently for any reason then they're not your friends to begin with, and if your happy then by all means.....go ahead and do what you "gotta" do.
2007-09-13 15:10:50 · answer #5 · answered by Miss. Realz 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You shouldn't hide the fact that you like her just so your friends will still talk to you. Interracial dating is much more accepted and if they can't accept the fact that you like her, then you need new friends. She might have walked off because she wasn't comfortable that your friends aked you that in front of her. Talking to a guy you like can be wierd when his friends are around. Guys tend to act different around their friends than they would in front of just you. As for the number thing, just tell her you really enjoy talking to her and want to know if you guys can hang out sometimes afterschool. If she says yes, exchange numbers so you can contact each other.
2007-09-13 15:12:47 · answer #6 · answered by Cinderelly 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
friends come and go but love can last forever, if they are a true friend they will understand your needs to love and feel loved. We are living in a day where race should not be a matter but some people still make it one. they need to be more like you and grow up and just realize we are all living in the same world and need to get along, it is easy to say but is hard to do i know but it is people like you that will make it easier and better. i wish you the best of luck and just jump in and see where it goes, it is the only way you will really know if she likes you
2007-09-13 15:09:42 · answer #7 · answered by shadow10262000 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Stick with what you believe in. Dont let your freinds run your life. You are still young and trust me one day most of the crew will have there own life and move on. You should never let freinds come inbetween what you really want. If they were freinds they would support your decisions. Its all on you to learn and make mistakes or whatever. People can be so cruel. Who cares what color you are. Just dont let them disrespect your prospect love interest.
2007-09-13 15:09:45 · answer #8 · answered by HottShorty78 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sounds like your african-Am friends need to back off, they might give you some trouble since they think you are going outside of their circles. Do you think the cauc girl would like to be your friend---do I sense romance---no big deal, I try not to judge. I would make friends with the girl you like and see if the interest is returned----maybe the school would help if trouble starts. Just tell the other girls that you like her , not for her skin, but because she is nice.
2007-09-13 15:09:11 · answer #9 · answered by skyward 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If your crew, as you call them, were really your friends, they would support your decision to date whoever you want. You friends probably feel that you should date an African-American women. In addition, they probably feel that you are betraying their race. However, you are going to continue to be African-American no matter who you date; therefore, your friends are out of line. If they are your friends, they will stick with you.
2007-09-13 15:09:41 · answer #10 · answered by SuziChi 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you put your friends first, you might never be able to see what could have come of it. Value their opinions, but don't base it on every decision you make, especially a personal one like that. She's not going to affect them in the same way she'll affect you; emotionally, physically, etc. So go with it and see where it goes. They should respect your decisions.
2007-09-13 15:22:34 · answer #11 · answered by blazin_mamma 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋