my mom moved away in febuary and i havent talked to her since because she wont answer the phone and she hasnt tried to call me. i just turned 18 and graduated from high school this year. when she moved i had to go live with my grandmother. once i graduated i left her house and went back to the house where i was living with my mom, which is also her mothers house, but after being there for a week she told me that she wanted me to leave cause she couldnt take care of me, but im 18 so she doesnt need to take care of me, i just needed a roof over my head. i have a loving bf who let me move in with him but sometimes i feel like i did the wrong thing and shouldnt have moved in with him because now my dad doesnt want to talk to me. i miss my mom alot and i dont know why she moved away but i also hate her for doing it. i want to talk to her and figure things out but i dont know what to do. please help me. if anyone knows Carol McCarthy in Gibsonville North Carolina tell her that i love her
2007-09-13 05:50:41 · 13 answers · asked by ? 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
i would ask my grandmother or dad but they dont know why either cause my parents are divorced, they have been since i was 5 and ive always lived with my mom. years ago i found out that my mom was a lesbian and she just admitted it to me last year during the summer. and i cant go live with my grandmother now, cause my brother is living with her cause me and my dad got him back from my mom cause he went down there with her, but me and dad went to his lawyer to get him back. and my dad has already told me that he doesnt want me living with him at all cause he doesnt want me around. im living with my bf and i do have a job. but not being able to talk to my mom is really hurting me, i find myself crying about it all the time and i have nightmares every night
2007-09-13 06:05:47 · update #1
i have her address and ive sent her a mothers day card a brithday card at the same time cause it was a few weeks apart, and i got a voice mail from her gf saying to never send anything to that address again cause i wasnt her daughter anymore cause i treated her so badly. but that doesnt make sense. ive lived with her all my life till now and she always told me that she loved me
2007-09-13 06:27:22 · update #2
i have nightmares every night, or dreams i cant tell. they are always about my mom and i see her in them everynight. and then i wake up screaming
2007-09-13 06:34:41 · update #3
i know for sure she's in North Carolina or at least i think so. i hope so. i feel like ive lost her, my heart is incomplete. i miss her so much
2007-09-13 07:31:51 · update #4
I wish you the very best on your situation ..... sorry I do not have advice on this one. I do not know what to tell you my dear young lady.
2007-09-13 05:58:32 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 2⤋
I'm so sorry to hear you are in such pain... Your mom leaves, you can't stay at your old house, you move in with your boyfriend because you have to, and now your father isn't speaking to you (what is wrong with HIM?)
I'm a 50 year old woman, and from where i sit, you have done the best you can, considering your circumstances. If i were your dad i would try and be more understanding, and realize you have suffered quite a lot at the hands of your mom. Moving in with your boyfriend was what you had to do at the time, and it was kind of him to offer.
I am sure it's very painful for you because your mom left. It makes me sad for you, just thinking about it. I'm sure your mom has good reason to move? However, it would have been nice if she'd have given you a reason, or kept in touch somehow.
I have known of a couple women who gave up their families because they had problems which they didn't want to expose their children to. Still it is painful for everyone.
Hon, you might consider talking with a therapist. You have been through quite enough already! Many counties have mental health clinices and offer services on a sliding scale, or can get you into a free grant program... their business offices can apply in your behalf.
I think it might do you a lot of good to talk with someone. You probably need someone who will listen, and who will give you some good direction. A therapist can also help us with life coping skills, so that we might be able to start to recover from the trauma we have gone through
do what is right for you.
and i'm sorry about your father... he is probably equally confused about your mom leaving, and is reacting without thinking about YOUR feelings right now.
sending love and hugs, and i wish you all the best. take care ok? and take good care of you.
2007-09-13 13:13:01 · answer #2 · answered by letterstoheather 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I sure wish I could help you.
I don't really understand the part about : " which is also her mother's house, but after being there for a week "she" told me that "she" wanted me to leave cause she couldn't take care of me." Your mom or your grandmother??
Your Dad won't talk to you because you moved in with your boyfriend? Could you have moved in with your Dad?
It sounds like your family is a bunch of VERY selfish people. At 18 most kids are going off to college and still have the support of their families. It sounds like you need to make some very definite goals for yourself and your life (what do you plan to do for a living?) It is very unfortunate but right now it sounds like you need to focus on yourself and your life- when you become a self sufficient adult then it will be a better time to rebuild your relationships with your family.
I will be praying for you.
2007-09-13 13:04:54 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
If I lived in Gibsonville, I would hunt your mother down for you and show her this! You poor thing! Do you have an address for her? If so you could write a letter to her, or ask your grandmother or father if they have an address. Where did your father pick up your brother from? Even if he is mad at you he may share that w/ you, or you brother may know her address if he was living w/ her. Or try this website http://www.switchboard.com/ type in her info there and see if it gives you an address. I hope you find her and get your questions answered! Also if you are feeling like you should not have moved in w/ your boyfriend, maybe you could looking into going to college and moving on campus...maybe that will also get your dad speaking to you again (eventhough he is wrong for not speaking to you now!) Good Luck!
2007-09-13 13:23:01 · answer #4 · answered by Summer Days 5 · 2⤊ 0⤋
I am a loving, caring 47 year old mother of a wonderful 26 year old son and 25 year old daughter and 3 beautiful grandkids with one on the way. But I have room in my heart and life for you, you sweet child. You can always come to Georgia and live with my family. We would welcome you with open, loving, big ole southern hearts. You are in entirely too much pain to be alone. Any reason your mother or father could give for cutting you out of their lives would not be good enough. You deserve happiness in your life. Just say the word and you have an instant family here! God bless you dear and please know that everything I say is from the bottom of my heart. There are many people who would love you and adore you here on this earth. The ones that don't, that is their loss. You are lovable just because you are you and they don't deserve you.
2007-09-20 18:59:10 · answer #5 · answered by swtserenity43 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Wow, that's one strange story. I can't think why someone would do that for no reason. I'm not trying to be mean but could she possibly have some sort of psychological disorder? Her behaviour is, from what you have said, way too bizarre. I don't think there's much you CAN do. You need to take care of yourself. You need to make good choices and sound decisions. You need to finish your education or get a decent job, whichever it is you want to do. If your Mom has requested 'no contact', for now, you'll have to follow that. Keep in touch with your dad and your grandparents and any other family members you may have. Just continue to work hard, do your best and stay safe. Best wishes, good luck.
2007-09-20 12:15:05 · answer #6 · answered by spiffy 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
A very sad story indeed. If I were you, I would try to move on with my life. Make myself as independent of family as possible. If they wanted to mend relations with me, I would give them a chance. But I wouldn't let anyone hurt me again. Sometimes the best thing to do is just move on and let the pieces fall where they may. It sounds like your mother has some issues that go way beyond anything you can solve. I wish you the best of luck. Hope things work out for you.
2007-09-20 21:17:20 · answer #7 · answered by ♥sick n tired♥ 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Hi there Jennifer,
I felt your hurt as i was reading this.I do not know what happend, so i can not Judge either her or you.
But if i was you Jennifer,try too make peace with your dad first then with your mom.But the best thing Jennifer,she may have a personal problem you do not even know about.
So please do not beat your selfe over this.But i think the best thing is too do,is write both your dad and Mom a Long letter and tell them you Love them,no matter what ever happens too you and them.Be compasionent,and Jennifer!!Let them Know you are sorry,even though you may not done any thing wrong!! or if you did you do not know.
Jennifer,you be a big person if you did that,and it will get them too think.
I pray this will work for you Jennifer,and i am praying for you as i write this.
Oh and one more thing,after writing them a letter,pleasse give them time too think,do not push them,and leave it.Cause you did your part..
Sincerely
Kenny
2007-09-19 19:43:55 · answer #8 · answered by kendaw374 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Ask your dad or grandma why she left, if she won't talk to you about it. Maybe she's ashamed of herself and can't face you right now. Go back to granny's or to dad's. Get a job, save some money and strike out on a life of your own. Don't feel too badly that your mom won't talk to you, it's nothing you did, and you know that. Surround yourself with people who make you happy and concentrate on you. When mom is ready she will talk to you about her life. It will take time, so be patient and don't pressure her. Send her notes and letters to let her know how you're doing. She will love to get them. She'll come around sooner or later. Until then, get on with your young life.
2007-09-13 12:58:43 · answer #9 · answered by gma 7 · 2⤊ 0⤋
OMG! u gave me chills u r soooo adorable. I really hope that things get better between u and ur mom and wen u said u hate her for what she did it reminds me that u can only hate someone u love. i think u should send something to her house that u know she is gonna love but dont tell her it was frm u and also u can go and talk to her and give her a big hug and kiss and u can talk to he rbout watz goin on and stuff and while leaving give her a letter and if u dont kno wat to write u can write :
MOm i tried for 2-3 hrs to write something but all that came in my mind was:
I love u and Miss u so much
ur proud daughter
X0Xo
and tell her to open wen u leave and i bet after that she is gonna call u. ( i really hope she does) dear
2007-09-13 12:59:37 · answer #10 · answered by someone special u can love 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Maybe your mother is ashamed ..this is her way of hideing.....I would say save up money for a ticket to go visit her....but do u know for sure that is where she is? I have never been in your situation but I never new my father and now am 26 ....there where times in my life I needed him or just wanted to meet him....I never had the guts to just go find him myself..I still dont. So best of luck to u.
2007-09-13 13:29:40 · answer #11 · answered by intensity92000 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋