I have a friend he is 40 years older than me. I'm 30 he's 70. Both of us divorced. He is a well respected doctor from my town. Well he invited me this weekend to another city 6 hrs from where we live. I want to go but I have a feeling he's gonna want sex, how can I make it clear to him that if we go is just as friends?
2007-09-13 03:21:44 · 42 answers · asked by needsuggestions 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
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What ? Hell No !!
You are just looking for TROUBLE!!!!!
2007-09-13 03:25:41 · answer #1 · answered by Dionannan 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
What kind of friend is he and how long has he been your "friend". Without knowing more information its hard to respond - My first instincts is that he is going to be looking for intimacy with you - unless there is a specific interest you both share and that is the reason for the trip. Is there a show, convention, etc that you would be joining him for? Is he going to a social event and just wants a hottie on his arm? If he is planning this trip only to get you six hours away from mutual people that may see you together than I would suspect he is looking to turn up your friendship a notch. By going you are sending him the message that you may be interested in something more. Are you? What kind of relationship with him are you interested in and why not discuss it with him fully. You are old enough and probably experienced enough to be frank with him and he most definitely is. If he were younger would you consider being intimate? If its just his age and everything else attracts you don't let a number stand in the way. If the whole idea of any chance that you could end up in a sexual relationship with him is a total impossibility on your part then I would advise against encouraging these type of trips....
2007-09-13 03:34:34 · answer #2 · answered by zoomer602 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Wow......it really depends.WHY do you want to go somewhere 6 hours away with someone 40 years older than you? What is the occasion? Being a Dr., he probably doesn't get the chance to get away too often so maybe you should remind him of that and suggest that he may enjoy his little getaway much more if, instead of you, he were to take along somebody he could sex. Thank him for the offer & tell him to give you a call when he gets back & you'll buy him a cup of coffee.
2007-09-13 03:40:27 · answer #3 · answered by ali 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You say he's a friend. Why would you think he wants to have sex with you?
You know he is wanting to have a relationship with you so going with him would be essentially using him for a free trip.
Disregarding the sex part, if he likes you more than a friend, you are still not being honest with him if you go.
You need to ask yourself if you will develop feelings for him at all. If the answer is "yes", then go. If the answer is "no" then it isn't fair to him.
Also, 70 is too old for you but you probably know this already.
2007-09-13 03:29:17 · answer #4 · answered by KD 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Being as you are both adults a honest forward approach would probley be the best. If he is truely interested in being friends then he should understand and respect that. If he cant respect it he has no bussiness calling himself a friend.
2007-09-13 03:43:09 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Find out what the sleeping arragements are going to be. Ask for separate rooms. Tell him flat out that you adore his friendship but are not looking to develop it into a romantic relationship. And if you can't get that across, don't go.
2007-09-13 03:25:37 · answer #6 · answered by mummy heffalump 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
If he's 40 years older than you then that means he's a big boy, intelligent and smarter/more mature than you, so he can probably handle the truth if you tell him. Although I would imagine that at that age his priorities regarding sex are different than your priorities.
2007-09-13 03:26:09 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Tell him?. He's a man, not a boy. You are probably not the first woman he's asked to go out of town, so he's heard the word NO before.
2007-09-13 03:26:45 · answer #8 · answered by harold 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
You just need to be honest and clear about your intentions. Let him no that you enjoy his friendship but that is it and all it will ever be. If he values your friendship he will respect you. If not who needs him? I am sure there are a lot of people your age who would like to be around you.
2007-09-13 03:25:52 · answer #9 · answered by June 2 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Simply let him know that you are not looking for intimacy just a friendship. Asking if your getting separate rooms. If he says no then tell him you want your own room to not give him the wrong impression.
2007-09-13 03:25:50 · answer #10 · answered by tootsiebrownie 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Ask for your own hotel room before you leave with him, that way after doing some sight seeing and having dinner you can go to your room instead of sleeping with him in his.
2007-09-13 03:30:05 · answer #11 · answered by gizmoe 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋