My mothers dog passed away last night, and?

Question

me and my husband are going to be bringing the dog to get creamated. Mom knows the prices to bring the dogs ashes home, but didn't say to. She also said "I can't bring him back anyways" when I said do you want the ashes. She doesn't have the money to do it. Do you think me and my husband should pay the difference and let her have the ashes? It takes 2 weeks to get them back. She is in absoulute histaricks. He was about 15 years old, and he was her baby. Thanks

Answer 1

I realize there are risks about getting your dogs ashes back such as if they are really yours but I did it anyway. I paid for a individual cremation and the vet clinic does the cremation themselves and that made me feel better. I like having the ashes as it feels like Koty's home again, at least in spirit. Also when I die I have told many people to bury his ashes with me so we can be together forever. I know just how hard it is to lose a beloved pet who was so old; Koty was 16. So I agree that you should get the ashes and ask your mom later if she wants them. I think that would be better than not doing it and having her regret it the rest of her life. Good luck!

Answer 2

I would pay the whole thing if it was my mom and she could not afford it. On the other hand, Why not just bury the dog? I think keepig ashes of a dog (or person) for that matter is silly. WHat happens to the ashes when the owner passes away? No one will care about them. If you do get the ashes then I would bury them as well. Maybe at the park..

SOmething else to consider is that when you do the ashes thing... you are NOT only getting the ashes of YOUR dog, you are getting a small portion of ashes from MANY dogs and Cats. They do not creamate animals one at a time and to cremate a dog would be such a small amount of ashes that they would be practically non existant.
Personally for me and knowing that I would get ashes from MANY dogs AND cats... I'd either just bury the dog in my back yard and make a memorial garden or leave the ashes with the vet to be passed around to other families and make a memorial garden with no ashes or body.
The memorial garden will help her to heal a LOT better then a can of ashes that may or may not contain ANY of her own dog.

Answer 3

That would be a nice thing to do and I'm sure your mom would appreciate your thoughtfullness. I have to disagree with Freedom and a few others who said that you are getting more then your dogs ashes. This is not the case if you have an individual creamation. It is more costly but it is only your pet who is being creamated at the time. I had one of my cats creamated and they supplied me with pictures (which I didn't look at) of her in the creamatory prior to her creamation. A reliable creamatory will do the job correctly, but like I said it is more expensive.

Answer 4

Well Kitcat sorry for your loss. I do know how it feels to lose a beloved pet. It is no different from losing a family member. Lots of people don't understand this or accept that you can love an animal this much but you can. Just try to think that your cat loved you so much and if possible would not want you to be in so much pain. No one can stop the pain for you or for any one grieving. Grieving is a process that we all have to deal with one way or another. I lost a precious loved Quaker parrot and cried for over three months about him so I do know and understand your pain. I know you don't want to hear this but you should get another cat to love, not one to take the other ones place for that would be impossible. But you can love another cat may be not as much , and you will always think if I could just have my other one back. But you can love a new one,and I am sure there is one out there that needs some one to love them. I got a new parrot and it has never been the same, but he needed me to love him. It has been over 15 yrs since my little bird died and I still would give any thing to have him back in my life. If you go to the animal shelter I am sure you will see so many poor little animals that are begging any one to come near and love them. Don't close your heart to them, it will get better but there will always be the empty spot in your heart for you loved cat that passed. All animals can and deserve the love of a human family. Some where out there is a soul that needs you .

Answer 5

The worst day of my life is when I put down a dog. Dogs are always with their owner, and this is the thing they want to do most. I look in the room I am now setting and my two dogs are beside me. If I get up and go into another room, I am not alone.

It is a good reason for you mother to be very upset. Anything you can do to help her would be an act of love.

Answer 6

Yes, pay the diff.She is not thinking rationally right now.She will thank you in the long run.Tell Mom to do a google search on the Rainbow Bridge.It is where dogs go after they pass.It is a very comforting site.God Bless Mom and you for being such a thoughtful Daughter.

I feel someday when I go up to God's loving arms my Pets and family that have passed on will be waiting for me.I hope so at least :)

Answer 7

Receiving his remains two weeks after cremation will start her grieving process all over again. Perhaps it would be best to either not request them or not give her the ashes until she requests them from you. I know how she feels...it's so very sad to lose a beloved pet that was not only your best friend but a member of the family...it is like losing a child. Her grieving process will take some time...just be there for her.

Answer 8

It is so hard to lose someone close to you....and losing a beloved pet is really akin to losing family. If your husband and yourself have the means to bring the dog's ashes home, than do it for your mom. I'm sure having a part of him still around would help ease her grief.

Answer 9

sorry to hear about your mothers dog passing but no i don't agree that your mother should have her dogs ashes back as the crem cannot guarantee that they are her dogs. sorry if this sounds harsh but i went through the same thing last year and felt the same way but once i had looked into it i decided the best way to keep her memory alive was to have a picture done of her and hang it where i could see her all the time we also brought a rose and planted it in her memory in the garden. the one question you have to ask yourselves is would you like it done to you?
tracey

Answer 10

cremate the dog

but dont bring back the ashes , it will only serve as a reminder and make your mums grief go on longer

if you have any pictures of the dog , why not get someone to paint a picture of it in happier times , something that will give her good memories , instead of sad ones


all the best
Ian