Real 911 Calls, believe it or not!!
Dispatcher: 9-1-1 What is your emergency?
Caller: I heard what sounded like gunshots coming from the brown house on the corner.
Dispatcher: Do you have an address?
Caller: No, I'm wearing a blouse and slacks, why?
Dispatcher: 9-1-1 What is your emergency?
Caller: Someone broke into my house and took a bite out of my ham and cheese sandwich.
Dispatcher: Excuse me?
Caller: I made a ham and cheese sandwich and left it on the kitchen table and when I came back from the bathroom, someone had taken a bite out of it.
Dispatcher: Was anything else taken?
Caller: No, but this has happened to me before and I'm sick and tired of it.
Dispatcher: 9-1-1 Fire or emergency?
Caller: Fire, I guess.
Dispatcher: How can I help you sir?
Caller: I was wondering.....does the Fire Dept. put snow ! chains on their trucks?
Dispatcher: Yes sir, do you have an emergency?
Caller: Well, I've spent the last 4 hours trying to put these chains on my tires and... well, do you think the Fire Dept. could come over and help me?
Dispatcher: Help you what?
Caller: Help me get these chains on my car!
Dispatcher! : 9-1-1 What is the nature of your emergency?
Caller: I'm trying to reach nine eleven but my phone doesn't have an eleven on it.
Dispatcher: This is nine eleven.
Caller: I thought you just said it was nine-one-one
Dispatcher: Yes, ma'am nine-one-one and nine-eleven are the same thing.
Caller: Honey, I may be old, but I'm not stupid.
Dispatcher: 9-1-1 What's the nature of your emergency?
Caller: My wife is pregnant and her contractions are only two minutes apart.
Dispatcher: Is this her first child?
Caller: No, you idiot! This is her husband!
And the winner is..........
Dispatcher: 9-1-1
Caller: Yeah, I'm having trouble breathing. I'm all out of breath. Darn..I think I'm going to pass out.
Dispatcher: Sir, where are you calling from?
Caller: I'm at a pay phone. North and Foster. Damn......
Dispatcher: Sir, an ambulance is on the way. Are you an asthmatic?
Caller: No.
Dispatcher: What were you doing before you started having trouble breathing?
Caller: Running from the Police
2007-09-12 16:57:56 · 10 answers · asked by Chantel C 3 in Entertainment & Music ➔ Jokes & Riddles
love it u should post more
2007-09-13 04:31:03 · answer #1 · answered by inlove 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
toooo funny
We have our police station calls poated in the newspaper and we get some really silly stuff like that... One called and said that their were birds just falling out of her tree and another said that their were escaped inmates outside her house- wich were actually two kids on the way to karate-
2007-09-12 17:03:32 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
Honey, I may be old, but I'm not stupid omg 2 punchlines in a row this is hilarious lol
2016-04-04 18:13:41 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
got to Im this to a friend...
lol
2007-09-12 18:11:25 · answer #4 · answered by sweetgogana2007 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I guess it takes all kinds.
2007-09-12 17:14:20 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
LMAO LMAO LMAO LMAO
LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL
OMG that was SOOOOO damn funny!
LOL
:D
2007-09-12 17:06:08 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
kaakakaakakaakaka
2007-09-12 17:36:46 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
haha, those are good
2007-09-12 17:05:27 · answer #8 · answered by k i w i ♥182 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
EHHEHEHEHEHEHHEHR
2007-09-12 18:38:23 · answer #9 · answered by Kelvin 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
That was funny. Thanks for sharing.
2007-09-12 17:03:14 · answer #10 · answered by Let's have babies 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋