My boyfriend(28) and I(23) have been dating for 5 months and he is so wonderful. We are very much in love and plan on getting married in the next 1.5 years. In everyway he is so good to me and everything I want in a man....
Today, he took me to the lake and said he needed to tell me something that he thought it was time I needed to know. He said he loved me so much and that is why he needed to tell me this. He said that he has 5 siblings and all of the have different fathers. He said that his mother was crazy when she was young and she wasn't the best mom. He said that his mom had an affair with a married man and that is how he was born. He was crying to me and had a lot of pain when he spoke.
Then he kept saying that know that he found love with me he appreciates it so much and he wants to have a real life and a normal life with me because of the bad memories of his parents.
How would you react? Would you love your bf/gf any less if he opened up to you like this?
Thank you
2007-09-12 16:06:47 · 25 answers · asked by HotJewels 3 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
No sweetie, you would love them just the same, because of what he went through as a child, he is who he is. Be thankful you have someone that you can connect with so well. Be there for him, hold him. For him to tell you something so personal must have been a great relief and also a huge ordeal. He loves you.
Love him back. =)
2007-09-12 16:17:34 · answer #1 · answered by A.G. 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
great! u have met the guy that he feel really trust in u. he have told u all the thing that he has been worried for many years and he hope that u would be pleased to hear that from u too. he is now finding the warm place to be in.
and ur question is how would u react to him? it is the easiest answer, like a friend if u were his friend what would u do? do what u want.
I don't spend much thing to tell u because I think u are wise enough to answer that kind of question. I have one thing to ask u " do u love him? or do u really love him? are u absolutely in love with him?
if u can answer all these question, u will know what u are going to do to him.
for me love mean love I don't care about anything about her background or any thing stupid that she has done in past. if she tells me it means that she is sharing her part of her to me
it is the great thing that u can get the guy that u love and he told u everything about himself.
ur happiness is in ur hand. good luck with ur love.
2007-09-12 16:38:18 · answer #2 · answered by kt 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I would love him more because he has told you something that not many people know about his family. He probably loves his family very much, including his half-siblings, and may even be protective of them and their feelings. It seems like he trusts that you are a kind and loving person. I would reassure him about my love and devotion. Since his siblings may also have sad memories of their mom and maybe their own fathers, I would try to get to know them as well, so that they feel accepted no matter what their background is. Your boyfriend will appreciate that.
2007-09-12 16:22:04 · answer #3 · answered by Jess 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Are you asking how to react because your bf opened up and shared something deep and private and emotional for him?? Or are you unsure how to react because of what the secret was? I think the answer to your question has more to do with your attitudes than anything else. I would think you would welcome open intimate conversations filled with secrets and adventures and sharing of pain/pleasures. On the other hand if you are judging him for his mothers actions or wondering at his stability because of his upbringing, then you would benefit from some open sharing of your own, either with him or a trusted counselor.
2007-09-12 16:20:51 · answer #4 · answered by spiderlegs54 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i would probably understand and love him more for this. THIS secret is nothing that HE should be ashamed of, nor is it probably much of a secret. the fact that he has 5 siblings from 5 different fathers shouldn't change anything between you two... now if HE was the FATHER of 5 children by 5 different mothers, THEN you can run haha j/k
2007-09-12 16:16:58 · answer #5 · answered by hello_beautiful 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I would love him more for trusting me and loving me enough to be honest and open with me.
It's really hard for people to talk about their past especially when it involves a not so happy moment in childhood.
I was molested as a child by my cousin and I never told my boyfriend because I figured it would ruin us but one night I talked to my best friend who is a guy and told him just to see if it would freak out a guy and he was really cool about it so I told my boyfriend and he was really supportive and sweet and now we're a lot closer.
The truth pulls people together and I think you should be very happy that he opened up to you. He just took your relationship up one more step and that's a good thing.
2007-09-12 16:13:14 · answer #6 · answered by Music 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I would not love them any less. I was in a relationship with a guy who was raised by foster parents and had many other problems. He still amazes me how well he has turned out. He is more stable than me.
2007-09-12 16:16:01 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Nothing should really change. That was the past, and the past is the pas and will never chang. He seems fine now so it should have no impact on your relationship. If you want to, talk to him about your feelings. Hope this helps : ) ♥
2007-09-12 16:17:28 · answer #8 · answered by carlyy ♡ ツ ♥ 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Are you sure you love him? Because if you did you wouldn't ask if you should love him less for a situation in which he has no control over. Its not his fault his mom has dirt.
2007-09-12 16:14:15 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sounds like you have a winner. Tell him you love him and remind him that he is not responsible for how or to whom he was born. It sounds like he handled his 'secret' revelation to you in a very mature way.
2007-09-12 16:16:31 · answer #10 · answered by Special K 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋