Why don't Jews ever seek my forgiveness during the 10 Days of Repentance?

Question

I'm not Jewish, but that doesn't mean I've never been owed an apology by someone who is. I think this is a great holiday and I'm even going to do it myself this year.

Do most Jews just not think to extend the practice to non-Jews? Or is there a more specific reason?

Sorry this sounds so arrogant, haha.

There seems to be a misunderstanding--

I said I'm sure there ARE things people might apologize to me for! Not the other way around.

..........

Answer 1

Your question is similar to asking why all Christians don't love me. It is the only commandment they are to obey, yet they don't treat others with love.

There are very few Jews in the world and only 2 percent of Americans are Jews. Of that 2 percent, many are secular. If you have a particular Jew in mind, then he is either secular, or he doesn't realize he has offended you, or (like me), he can't work up the courage to do it. Asking forgiveness from your peers is much more difficult than asking forgiveness from God. I will be punished for not having received forgiveness from others, but the Jewish God is a God of justice, as well as a kind and loving God. I have faith that my punishment will be in accordance with the degree of my sin. Our God condemns no one to eternal torment.

Before I converted to Judaism, I had a Jewish friend who asked my forgiveness. I couldn't think of anything he had done that required my forgivess so I hemmed and hawed about it. He kept at it until I finally said that I forgave him. So yes, there are many Jews who do seek forgiveness from others, but of the few Jews in this world, there are even fewer who will actually ask your forgiveness.

In Judaism, the emphasis is on *asking* forgiveness from others, making amends, and demonstrating that you will not sin again. One of the worst sins is *lashon hara,* evil talk. When you gossip and slander your neighbor, it is impossible to make amends -- especially here on the internet. There is no way you can "undo" the harm you've done to your Jewish acquaintance, but you still must ask his forgiveness (three times if necessary), demonstrate that you will not gossip again, and only then can you ask God's forgiveness.

Jew-by-choice
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Answer 2

Since you're centering this question around yourself, then perhaps you'll realize that Jews are no more perfect than anyone else, and that they may not realize you have been offended, or may have forgotten, or any number of other things. If you have a problem with someone who is Jewish, just as with someone of any other faith, I would suggest you speak up. One can't ask forgiveness if one doesn't know that they've given offense.

Most of us do extend the practice to our friends and acquaintances of all beliefs; Rosh Hashannah, Yom Kippur, and the high holy days are all about making a clean start, and I certainly wouldn't think it would be possible to do that without asking the forgiveness of all I'd offended. Most Jews do this with regards to Jews and other people in the weeks preceeding the holidays themselves, however, and the actual day of Yom Kippur is for asking forgiveness SPECIFICALLY from God.

Answer 3

Someone might not know that they hurt you, nor remember that they did. True, they should apologize-that is a definite-Jewish or not.
We all have something to apologize for and the days that we do should not be restricted to ten days a year. If anyone was to hurt someone, they should seek forgiveness before the hurt goes too far. If that was not done, these 10 days give us time to think about who we have forgotten--who we did hurt but did not remember.
Again, Jewish or not, each person should forgive who they have hurt-intentionally or by accident.

Answer 4

I'm not Jewish either, but whether it is for religion or general physical or mental health - wouldn't it be much more satisfying to offer forgiveness even when you have not been asked? Maybe you should ask forgiveness from your Jewish friends, or God or the even the Universe for feeling like anyone owes you anything. We're all in this world together, try to find peace.

Answer 5

Hi Kazekko,

I don't think the reason is that practice is not extended to non-Jews. The practice is to ask from your friend that you think you harmed him for his forgiveness. So I guess you have to find a Jewish friend of yours (not secular since they do not practice) that offended you and ask him why he didn't asked for forgiveness.

If I harmed you in any way I'm honestly and thoroughly ask your forgiveness.

Answer 6

On Rosh HaShana, we ask forgiveness of PEOPLE we may have offended, harmed, done wrong to, etc. On Yom Kippur, we ask G-D's forgiveness for any transgressions against Him. The general practice is to ask everyone you know to forgive you for any transgressions, known or unknown, that you may have done in the past year. This covers everything whether you actually DID anything wrong or if possibly, someone may have perceived that you wronged them even if it was not your intention.
Your question isn't arrogant at all- and technically, your friend should have asked for forgiveness whether she thought she did something wrong or not- just to "cover her bases" so to say

Answer 7

You've asked a great question. Yes, we are supposed to ask forgiveness from **anyone** we have wronged during the year. In fact it goes deeper than merely a nice thing to do. Our tradition teaches us that Yom Kippur--the Day of Atonement--**only** atones for transgressions between people and G-d. Yom Kippur very specifically does **not** atone for wrongs we may have done to other people.

Unfortunately, not very many people are brave enough to ask forgiveness. When they do, it's wonderful. I had a boss once who was Jewish and every year he would ask my forgiveness for anything he had done during the year. It was awesome.

Answer 8

particular to the two questions. positioned "repent" and "forgive" right into a Bible seek engine and you will discover gospel passages like those: Mark a million:4 (see additionally Luke 3:3): And so John got here, baptizing interior the barren region region and preaching a baptism of repentance for the forgiveness of sins. John the Baptist taught that forgiveness demands repentance--and Jesus submitted to baptism to form how we are to repent. His ministry began with the message, "Repent, for the dominion of heaven is to hand." Luke 17:3: "in case your brother sins, rebuke him, and if he repents, forgive him. If he sins against you seven circumstances in an afternoon, and 7 circumstances comes lower back to you and says, 'I repent,' forgive him." be conscious that repentance is often the circumstance for forgiveness. people who do not repent, like people who won't forgive others, at the instant are not forgiven. Luke 24:40 seven: Repentance and forgiveness of sins would be preached in his call to all countries, commencing up at Jerusalem. yet is penance required? look into the story of Zacchaeus in Luke 19: yet Zacchaeus stood up and stated to the Lord, "seem, Lord! right here and now I provide 0.5 of my possessions to the undesirable, and if I incredibly have cheated anybody out of something, i will pay lower back 4 circumstances the quantity." Jesus stated to him, "right this moment salvation has come to this homestead, by way of fact this guy, too, is a son of Abraham." It grew to become into the reparation for sin in returning the stolen money that signaled that Zacchaeus grew to become into severe approximately repentance. Repentance isn't in straightforward terms asserting sorry. It features a conviction which you have performed incorrect, a decision to not proceed in wrongdoing, and a willingness to do what's plausible to mitigate the wear and tear that grew to become into performed. CDF

Answer 9

You make a religious observance sound like a twelve step program.
We speak directly to G-d, we do not go through other people to get to G-d.

Whatever your religion, perhaps you can find it within yourself to not want or feel you are deserving of anything.You have your own relationship with your G-d and try not to hold on to grudges.

You confused me with the fact that you are going to"Do it this year "? What is it that you are going to do?
All that is expected is prayer.
I wish you the best.

Answer 10

I think most Jews focus on seeking G-d's forgiveness for their transgressions during the Days of Repentance. But if I owed someone an apology for some wrong I committed, I agree that this would be a really appropriate time to seek that individual's forgiveness as well.

Now you've got me thinking. Thanks.