my roommates at the time never came to visit once and we had all been friends and spent time together almost everyday before then. To me it was a slap in the face. Would this piss someone off if it had happened to them? I would be there for my friend every step of the way and in more recent events I have had roommates who have visited me if I had to go in the hospital. I guess I take it as a personal hit when your own friends dont show. I dunno let me know what you think. Thank you.
2007-09-12 04:05:37 · 15 answers · asked by Anonymous in Health ➔ Mental Health
I dunno I guess the fact that we shared an apartment together and they never came kinda doesnt sit right. I mean if someone I was living with wasnt there I would want to figure things out.
2007-09-12 04:11:53 · update #1
I agree. I think if you did them no wrong then they should have been there for you. Maybe they were a little uncomfortable with the situation. I think they should have still made an effort. Of coarse there may have been other factors, not sure of your situation. But they should have been able to make some time for a sick friend regardless of wither it was mental illness or physical illness.
2007-09-12 04:11:00 · answer #1 · answered by ? 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I'm betting that if it had been a physical issue that landed you in the hospital, they would have been there on a daily basis. Unfortunately, there is still a stigma connected with any mental illnesses, and it's just not right. Most mental illnesses can be connected to a chemical imbalance. Since it's an illness or condition which you can't see, such as a surgery scar or a cast, for example, it freaks people out. Things we can't see are harder to understand, but with some education, people are beginning to be more sympathetic to those with mental disorders. I also would have been very upset to have those closest to me virtually abandon me when I needed them the most. If you can, I'd talk with them and explain what happened and how you felt. What they don't realize is that it could also happen to them, and they'd certainly appreciate the support of their friends.
2007-09-12 04:15:21 · answer #2 · answered by N L 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I know how you feel, and I would feel the same, but you have to remember, this isn't just the hospital. My son had brain surgery a couple of months ago and his room was just hopping with visitors.
But you were in a psychiatric hospital. People are afraid to come to a psychiatric hospital. They have concepts that come from old movies, about the screaming and moaning of desperate patients, and the chains and straight jackets binding the patients up.
Most people have not been to a modern psychiatric unit. And most are scared to come.
So don't blame your roommates. Were they glad to see you when you returned? They were probably a little stand-offish because they didn't know what to expect from you, but if you give them a ltitle time, they'll get used to you again and it'll all be okay.
TX Mom
2007-09-12 04:14:20 · answer #3 · answered by TX Mom 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Your 'friends' may have felt 'extremely uncomfortable' with visiting you when you were in the hospital for a 'mental health' issue, or they may have been 'staying away' so that you could 'concentrate' on getting better again. I totally agree with you ... when a person you know well and like or love is 'in distress' you should 'be there' for that person as much as possible. Unfortunately, it's really EASY to 'forget' about a person who is hospitalized for ANY reason ... and sometimes it's up to the 'one who is sick' to 'reach out to rejoin the world' after 'release' and not the ones who were well to reach out to the sick one with a helping hand ...
This is YOUR LIFE, and how you 'feel' is TOTALLY UP TO YOU ... you may decide to 'divorce yourself completely' from those 'roommates' or you may want to 'reestablish the friendship.' Just remember that you can only decide for YOURSELF and that they are 'individuals' who may not 'agree' with you (in both 'directions) ...
I'm a psychologist, and I've heard many times that the 'only person you can ever depend upon is yourself.' I do NOT agree with that ... but then I have a person I can 'depend upon totally' and who depends on me the same way. If I have this, then you can find it too ... and my 'advice' to you is to 'be kind, gentle, and loving' and 'let go' of your 'bad feelings' as much as is possible, and REACH OUT to others and be 'a really good friend' so that you may have the kind of 'dependable relationship' I have someday.
2007-09-12 04:16:07 · answer #4 · answered by Kris L 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well, I don't know how old you are now...if it's been awhile, you should have already gotten over this. As a nurse that has dealt extensively with mental health patients, I can offer this: maybe the hospital wouldn't allow them to visit...consider that it may have been stipulated in your care plan that you couldn't have visitors other than family. Maybe they were simply afraid...it's hard to say without knowing the circumstances of your hospitalization. If you still have contact with them, why don't you ask them about it?
2007-09-12 04:11:08 · answer #5 · answered by NurseBunny 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I was 20 and for three days I had vistors during visiting hours then I was allowed to go home. I guess my friends and family were more comfortable with that kind of thing. I didn't really want them there though. I guess if I had been there longer I would have felt differently.
2007-09-14 05:44:23 · answer #6 · answered by Susas 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I would be upset, you where going through a rough time and where at your worst, thats when you need your friends the most. Your friends may have been worried about you and didnt want to see you like that, some people cant handle that. I would ask them why they didnt visit you, see what they say. You may need to find more supportive friends. Good Luck
2007-09-12 04:15:04 · answer #7 · answered by Emily May 11/10/08 :) 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I think it is bad they didn't see you or send you at least a letter, phone call.
However they may be a bit unsure how to address the issue and alot of people fear hospitals. I wouldn't really make a big deal out of it unless they are still acting distant now.
2007-09-12 04:12:51 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think that whenever you assume that people should act a certain way you are setting yourself up for dissapointment. Have you asked them why they didn't come? Maybe they felt like you needed your space. Maybe the fact that you were having mental problems scared them. Maybe they thought they had to be invited. Maybe they were told by someone they shouldn't come for some reason. Don't just make assumptions and then get mad when people don't live up to them.
2007-09-12 04:09:49 · answer #9 · answered by leaptad 6 · 4⤊ 0⤋
I do think that would be awful to experience. Maybe your Friend is not as close to you as you might think. Put it out in the open and let this person know how you feel. How it hurt etc. It takes courage to do what I just mentioned. But as least the truth would be out there.
2007-09-12 04:13:28 · answer #10 · answered by LDB449 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋