She got in trouble in school and says it was not her fault..I don't know what to do?

Question

How do you handle a child who says her teacher is getting on to her when she is doing nothing wrong? It is nothing serious just little things, like talking and getting up and being made to sit on the naughty bench. This is our first year in school, I have been homescholing both my children until now. The child is in Kindergarden. I want to know if her teaher is being unfair but I also don't want my child to think that she can do something and the blame getting in trouble on her teacher...How best to handle this...I am at a loss

Thank you guys, I am currently the ESL teacher at the school and also know the teacher. I even have the opportunity to watch my daughters class since it is adjacent to mine for a few hours each week. My daughter is not a trouble maker and the reason I was concerned is that she would never willing do something wrong or continue to do something she has been told is wrong but I also know her teacher is not mean, so I was torn as to whether or not to talk with her teacher about it or wait and see. She has only been in class about 3 weeks. Also her teacher sees me 3 days a week and has not brought any of this up to me, it's my daughter who tells me she got in trouble. As for Lew...get over yourself...you have no idea what you are talking about.....it shows

Answer 1

I know exactly what you are going through. You want to always believe that your children won't lie to you, but on the other hand you can't believe that the teacher would lie to you either. Tough one. I know this is going to be really hard for you, but, if you are going to allow your child to continue going to school, she needs to learn that what the teacher says....Goes. Maybe she feels like talking and getting up are not being bad, but the teachers rules say that it is. Now is the time to let her take responsibility for her actions. She'll learn fast, trust me. If you step in now and do something about it, she'll think that you will always battle for her. In some instances that is necessary, but she also needs to be able to fight her own battles as she gets older.....it teaches them character.

Good luck!

Answer 2

Take time to go into the classroom a few times mom. Schedule a couple of visits and make a few unscheduled visits. You have a right to go into your child's classroom an observe what's going on. The teacher may well be on her best behavior with your child while you are there, but she may well show the same signs with other children.

While there, make sure that you sit at the back of the room and just be an observer. Let the teacher teach. Let your child be the student. You are just there to watch and must suppress your comments if the teacher has to address a problem with your child. If you see something you don't like then schedule a meeting with the teacher after school. She is very busy and addressing it then and there in the classroom isn't the right time.

As for your daughter, remember, she was home schooled until now. When a child enters an actual school setting they can become a little more excitable being around the other children and have trouble sitting for longer periods of time. She may be talking and getting out of her seat when she's not supposed to.

To be fair to your child, yourself and the teacher, take the time to go into the classroom and watch what's going on there before making any rash decisions.

Answer 3

this is precisely the sort of thing PTA meetings are for ,and the school should also be willing to meet with you and the teacher on any occasion ,sit ins are a great way to see the curriculum or how well the teacher is capable of working with the children in their class ,but it rarely solves problems as teachers and students tend to be on their best behavior when a parent is in the class room

your school may allow you to observe the class from the out side ,but this is not common (though very effective)

a kindergarten child is still learning the ropes in the school environment ,and is going to make minor mistakes in behaviors and class room etiquette ,this is to be expected . the old adage of different place different rules falls in to play here and thug what is being done is perfectly acceptable at home or most other places ,they may not be appropriate in school , this is what your child may need help to understand and may be confusing for a child of 5 or 6 years ,and this will likely pass .
but remember as a child's education continues ,nothing is their fault ,and teachers have ben punishing students for nothing since the first school was started and likely always will

Answer 4

When you pick up your daughter from school just introduce yourself and have an informal chat.Ask her to let you know if your daughter is having any problems adjusting to school routines,making friends etc. and let the teacher know you want to work together with her, for your child's success.It is possible your daughter is not telling the truth and is trying to play on your emotions.Many schools have agendas for their students so parents and teacher have daily communication.I'm glad that you are keeping an open mind on this.Good luck.

Answer 5

schedule a parent teacher meeting asap. you want to speak with the teacher alone and get her side of the story, and then both you and child talk with the teacher and give them both a chance to speak. You are right to be concerned and right in knowing that you need more evidence. If you are unable to find peace with the situation you may have to involve the principal and have your child placed in a different classroom.
This could be a matter of personalities clashing. Good luck.

Answer 6

First thing is to arrange a talk with her teacher. Be open and discuss your concerns.
If you feel the teacher is being unfair after the meeting, next step is a meeting with the principal.
It is always good to resolve problems like this, as quickly as possible.
( Connie Mom of 4 and 5th. grade teacher )

Answer 7

LOL

My son never does anything wrong -- says my son.

The best thing I've figured is to get to know their teachers early on. Volunteer at the school. Keep in contact with the teacher. That way, if your kid is saying the teacher is mean and just picks on her and she's not doing anything wrong, you can determine if that sounds like the person you've gotten to know.

Also keep in mind, if it's something like that she's getting up when she shouldn't, or she's talking when she shouldn't, that's something most parents can tell, if they stop and think about it, if their children would be prone to do. With one of my kids (the one whose teacher "picks on him"), I can't get him to shut up at home. So when his behavior calandar at school says that he was talking, it's pretty easy to believe that he was, indeed, talking when he wasn't supposed to.

With minor things like that (something that doesn't mean he was TRYING to be "bad", I mean, didn't you ever get in trouble for talking without really meaning to cause trouble?), I just focus on personal responsibility. He doesn't technically get in trouble at home about those things, but I don't let him blame the teacher or other kids, either. I just tell him that regardless of what anyone else does, there is a way I expect him to behave, and he needs to be in control of himself.

Then, if there is something that really DOESN'T sound right, I'll absolutely investigate and expect to be taken seriously.

Answer 8

You need to have a discussion with the teacher. Make sure she has legitimate reasons for punishing your child. If she doesn't than I would ask that you be allowed to sit in on her class to see what is going on.

Answer 9

IT IS A BIG DEAL, your child needs to learn that when the teachers says something it needs to happen. Talking and getting up in the middle of the class is rude, and distracting. Although she did have one point right, it's not her fault.......it's your for not teaching her to respect the people who are in charge. Tell her to do as the teachers says....no questions asked, she's in kindergarden for god sakes why do you even listen to what she is saying, I can't believe you are torn about this......

Answer 10

Have a conference with the teacher to find out exactly what is going on. It might be that your daughter is just not used to having someone else teach her and not used to being with so many other kids. She might just be overwhelmed.