AUTO REPAIR
A blonde pushes her BMW into a gas station.
She tells the mechanic it died. After he works on it for a few minutes, it is idling smoothly.
She says, "What's the story?"
He replies, "Just crap in the carburetor."
She asks, "How often do I have to do that?"
SPEEDING TICKET
A police officer stops a blonde for speeding and asks her very nicely if he could see her license.
She replies in a huff, "I wish you guys would get your act together. Just yesterday you take away my license and then today you expect me to show it to you!"
KNITTING
A highway patrolman pulled alongside a speeding car on the freeway.
Glancing at the car, he was astounded to see that the blonde behind the wheel was knitting!
Realizing that she was oblivious to his flashing lights and siren, the trooper cranked down his window, turned on his bullhorn and yelled, "PULL OVER!"
"NO!" the blonde yelled back, "IT'S A SCARF!"
IN A VACUUM
A blonde was playing Trivial Pursuit one night.
It was her turn.
She rolled the dice and she landed on Science & Nature.
Her question was, "If you are in a vacuum and someone calls your name, can you hear it?"
She thought for a time and then asked, "Is it on or off?"
FINAL EXAM
The blonde reports for her university final examination that consists of yes/no type questions.
She takes her seat in the examination hall, stares at the question paper for five minutes and then, in a fit of inspiration, takes out her purse, removes a coin and starts tossing the coin, marking the answer sheet: Yes, for Heads, and No, for Tails.
Within half an hour she is all done, whereas the rest of the class is still sweating it out.
During the last few minutes she is seen desperately throwing the coin, muttering and sweating.
The moderator, alarmed, approaches her and asks what is going on.
"I finished the exam in half an hour, but now I'm rechecking my answers."
THE THERMOS
A blond was shopping at K-Mart and came across a shiny silver thermos. She was quite fascinated by it, so she picked it up and brought it over to the clerk to ask what it was.
The clerk said, "why, that's a thermos…. it keeps hot things hot and cold things cold."
"Wow," said the blond, "that's amazing… I'm going to buy it!"
So she bought the thermos and took it to work the next day. Her boss, who is also blond, saw it on her desk.
"What's that?" he asked.
"Why, that's a thermos… it keeps hot things hot and cold things cold," she replied.
"Wow, that's amazing," said the boss, "what do you have in it?"
"Two popsicles and some coffee"
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2007-09-11 22:58:11 · 13 answers · asked by william v 5 in Entertainment & Music ➔ Jokes & Riddles
VERY GOOD!!!!
2007-09-12 04:37:50 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
very humorous lol blonde version of who desires to be a millionaire: quickest finger question: placed those Rocky video clips so as beginning with the earliest.....Rocky a million,Rocky 2,Rocky 3,Rocky 4 those 2 blonde females drove to Disneyland.They observed an illustration that pronounced "Disneyland Left" so they went left and went back residing house. they stumbled on 2 blonde females frozen to dying of their automobile on the force-in action picture theatre. They went to make certain "Closed For The wintry climate". why cant blondes make kool-help they cant make certain how they get 8 cups water interior the koolaid packet wellbeing care expert (employing a stethoscope): "enormous breaths." Blond: Yeth. and that i'm no longer even thickteen yet how did the blonde get sq. boobs she forgot to take the kleenix out of the field this blonde ladys pal improve into particularly injured and mandatory to bypass to the wellbeing midsection for scientific interest.So she finally have been given her to the emrgency.So the nurse on the er asked her why didnt she purely cal "911"? The blonde woman pronounced"properly i couldnt locate the "11" button." 2 blondes are walking interior the woods whilst one spots tracks and says, "whats up look, submit to tracks!" to which the different blonde replies, "no those are deer tracks!" they argue for style of an hour. next morning, information headlines study:2 blondes, killed via prepare.
2016-10-04 10:34:35 · answer #2 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Hahahaha! those are great! I hadn't heard any of them before! My favorite blonde joke goes like this.
A blonde walks into a library and says to the librarian, "May I have a burger and some fries?" The librarian says, "Uh, this is a library." and the blonde says, "Oh, I am sorry," and then she whispers, "May I have a burger and some fries?"
2007-09-11 23:04:25 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Liked the First Two, cos i've never heard them before...... rest were also good but old!!
2007-09-11 23:02:18 · answer #4 · answered by nice_libra_guy 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Good old blonde jokes. * 4 u.
2007-09-11 23:04:36 · answer #5 · answered by Sharp Shooter 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Oh my gosh! That is sooo funny! I'm totallly laughing my butt off!
LOL I'm blonde and I'm laughing! Oh my gosh!
2007-09-11 23:03:52 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Some good - some old - star for you!
(=oP
2007-09-11 23:10:46 · answer #7 · answered by Lilkryptonite 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
hahahahahahhahahaha they're hilarious!
and im blonde! yay! hahahaha xoxoxox
2007-09-11 23:01:21 · answer #8 · answered by anything2getin 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Nice jokes!
The first one was lame though.
KNITTING was the bessst.Got 'Nymore?
2007-09-11 23:06:55 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
lol ive heard of all them, but still great
2007-09-11 23:01:11 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋