Never been kissed?

Question

I will be turning 16 years old this Sunday on the 16th.
I haven't had a boyfriend, neither a first kiss. >-<
Friends of mine have all had their first kiss, and share of boyfriends. (They started dating what in grade 7-8)
I just feel like the awkward, since I'm the only one of my friends who hasn't dated.
I’ve not rejected anybody, due to the fact I’ve never been asked out.
I think possibly because I’m quite shy plays a part in it.
It’s not like I want to have my first kiss with someone joe blow that I don’t love or care for,
I want to have a relationship with a guy and I want it to be special and meaningful
Anyways I'm blabbering on.

I just think I'm a ‘late bloomer’, I'm just dating-challenged, or I have been cursed because my parents were popular in high school and dated many people. Haha

Anyways,
If I do like someone instead of “the guy approach girl” thing, should I approach guys?
Or
Should I just enjoy the rest of my teen years, and just wait for the right guy to come along?

Answer 1

I was a lot like you. I had problems with social anxiety and I didn't have my first real kiss until I was 18.

Assuming that your shyness is a major part of your problem...

I think that life and love are really confusing at 16. You are probably still a little uncomfortable in your skin, and if you are like me then you just need to get out there and prove to yourself that you can be comfortable with guys. It takes more time for some people to do this than it does for others.

As for whether you should just sit back and enjoy or do the approaching... I think you should do something in between. My experience shows that guys like to be the ones approached every now and then (so definitely don't discard this option), but there's still nothing wrong with sitting back and enjoying high school. The right guy might come along, but even if he doesn't the experiences of high school alone will help you develop a better sense of self and trust me, that does help in overcoming shyness and getting into the dating world.

Answer 2

I'm in the same situation as you (except for the parents being very popular and stuff), just not stressing out about it too much. As far as I can tell, your other friends are just looking to have a good time while they still can during their teen years; you should do the same. College is going to come fast and right after that, full-time work comes into your life and becomes part of your daily routine.

Now, I'm not saying to go out there and do exactly what they're doing if you're not 100% comfortable with it, but just sit back, relax, and enjoy life as it comes. I wouldn't want to blow my first kiss with some school whore or anything like that. It's not worth my time.

The wait will be worth it, especially if you're looking for that really special someone and want a truly meaningful relationship. I'm in the same position as you and I'm just as shy, if not more, than you, and I've been waiting for that someone for as long as you have ;) Personally, I really couldn't give a rat's *** if I don't even get my first kiss in high school. I'll just be laughing at my other friends who wasted their's on someone totally not worth it. Besides, I think we can both agree that waiting will pay off down the road - it'll be an experience you'll never forget.

Answer 3

I think you might need to take a more active role in your search for love. I have never asked a girl out, but I have been asked by some girls, so believe me, it's been done before and it often works.

You should test the waters a little, while you are still in high school, because it is quite a bit harder to meet people and get close once you get to college - there are simply too many people and not enough time to be close friends with all of them.

I would suggest that you look for some nice guy that isn't going to do you wrong, and someone where - if something does ever happen to your relationship, you can still be friends and be happy you shared your first kiss with him...

Start talking to him more and finally get the nerve to ask him out on a date. Then see where it goes from there. Remember, you are just testing the water... you don't have to find your soul-mate right away!

Answer 4

YOU PUCKING ROCK! Seriously you are me a year ago.
Dude, seriously do NOT worry. YOU are obviously just not a slut. haha. YOu know what i finally (at 17 ) got my 1st kiss and it was way more magical than any of my other friends first kisses bcuz i waited for the right guy to do it. And u know what else? People dont know **** on this site. Everyone will try to tell u that men hate it when you come up to them or whatever but honestly i made a bold move at my guy and now he's well...my guy! Call it lame but i practically made it obnoxiously obvious that i liked him and he recipricated and asked me out. SO go for it. And if u make a move and the guy is a looser who doesn't want u back then why would you want to kiss him anyway? yuk. no spark. haha well i talk to much but in short do NOT cave in and just pick any old guy.
Personally i think the main reason u haven't found one yet is that there are too many loosers and your standards are too high...and well...let's face it...not many men fit the mold.


BUt ok all i can say is I'm living proof that you can have a good start and a perfect first kiss at 17 years old.

It's not u...no wait..it is you...but in a good way. YOur not weird...you are smart. 3 cheers for YOU! ♥ kiki

Answer 5

I think that there is nothing wrong with what you are doing. You are observant, and you know what you do and do not want.

When you find it, then you'll know when to make the leap. The right person just hasn't come along yet. That's okay. At least you don't come off as the type of girl that is cheap and easy.

I have a friend who will be twenty in February. She is slender and beautiful, in college, and has a good head on her shoulders. She got her first kiss only a few months ago, and still has yet to have a boyfriend. She's keeping her eyes open, but wants to find the 'right one,' not a 'just for now' guy.

Don't let anyone pressure you into dating people you don't feel right about. Wait until you're truly ready. You're not walking the same pace as everyone else, but you're still walking. I think by taking your time to find the right one, you're showing a great deal of self respect.

Answer 6

Brittney. First off, if that's your picture, you are very pretty. And I don't mean that in a creepy way, I am not hitting on you, you are way younger than me.

But seriously 16 is SO young. You have years ahead of you to find that right someone.

But I think it is a mistake to wait around for that perfect person. You may as well have that first kiss with someone you care about, but don't be crazy picky and end up never kissing anyone. You want to get some practice in with some people that don't matter too much. It would be sad to save yourself for that perfect guy, only to blow it because you don't know what you are doing.

Sooner or later the chance will present itself. Enjoy it. And don't freak out with the perception that you are the last one who has never been kissed. I expect some of your friends are actually lying just to fit in.

Answer 7

You can approach guys, but make sure it's someone you are ACTUALLY INTERESTED IN, unless you just want to be friends of course. Lotsa girls get all panicky because they've never had a boyfriend, and then they go out and pick up the first guy that will take them, which, a bunch of times is a VERY wrong choice. Why do you have to have one SO EARLY? What's the RUSH? Enjoy being single with no strings attatched, it's not that bad.
Sometimes, if you get a guy, they won't let you hang out with your friends or even let other boys LOOK at you.
So, single isn't that bad. And who knows, Mr.Right might come when you're least expecting it. One of the biggest surprises in life is that the best things come to those who wait. Love jumps up on a lot of people when they least expect it.

Answer 8

Well first off, just because all the other girls have more "experience" with boys, doesn't make you a late bloomer at all! Everyone does things at their own pace, and trust me, you'll be very pleased with yourself later in life for not throwing yourself at anyone just because everyone else has.

Now, I wouldn't say do NOTHING. If there's a guy that you like, there's nothing wrong with approaching him! Now you don't have to make it official and "ask him out" or anything like that. Just talk to him, be around him, etc.
I don't think you need to even worry about the kiss thing, that'll happen when it happens you know? So what if you haven't kissed anyone! Just worry about having a good time. If that involves a guy, then great! If someone just doesn't strike your fancy, then who cares! You won't be single forever :o)

Just go with the flow, and don't make a "to-do" out of anything. Things will fall into place a assure you.

Answer 9

I know exactly how you feel. I was the same way in high school. I was very shy and never had a boyfriend and never had a kiss.

I think you need to stick it out because your first kiss is supposed to be special with someone you like. Don't worry the right guy with come along.

All I can say is be a little more outgoing. Afterall, what can it hurt??

Answer 10

I LOVE that you wrote on the bottom, "Should I just enjoy the rest of my teen years, and just wait for the right guy to come along?" That is so EXACTLY IT! You seem to be a young lady with a great head on her shoulders. You know, the right guy will come a long. You may just be too much for a teenager. College is right around the corner. Enjoy your teen years and let it all flow naturally. You'll have your day in the sun!