I have just gotten divorced in 2005 and wasn't ready for anything. Well 2 years later I started to like someone at the job, well the feeling I thought was mutual because we talked alot he expressed his feelings for me until I made the mistake to have sex with him, now I seem not to exist in his world.. what can I do or not do to prevent this from happening again? I feel used and really don't feel like dating anyone for a really really long time.
2007-09-11 10:02:25 · 13 answers · asked by marla b 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
don't let him bother you, actually show him that you don't care at all. don't ask him "why don't you talk to me anymore" why did you use me?" , "I thought we were friends" just matter of a factly let him know that you are both employed by the same company, you might have had sex with one another but that was a fleeting moment and it's over your a big girl and can handle the one nighter and now he needs to be a big boy and do the same because this is the grown up world and you have to work together. Please, please, please don't be that girl..and allow this complete idiot to damage your future with other men, consider it practice for the real thing.
2007-09-11 10:15:22 · answer #1 · answered by sadiaelena 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
That's a tough one. I've dated a few people from work before & haven't had that problem. They were very cordial when it didn't work out and we remained friends. Sounds like this guy is just a selfish loser. All you can do is move on. You can't give up on love or even just plain dating. But you need to be cautious and protect yourself. It's hard to let people in after what you've been through but you can't just isolate yourself completely because of it. Love is a risk and you have to decide if you want that enough to be willing to take the chance that you may get hurt.
Maybe you'd be better off having a friend set you up with someone they know is a nice guy or finding someone online rather than dating someone from work.
Personally, if it were me, I would be sure to get the word out at workabout what a loser & user this guy is so he doesn't do it to anyone else! But that's just me!
2007-09-11 17:14:02 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I wait 3 months after the first date before I have sex with a woman, especially if I really like her. Every once in a while its just a booty call, but not with someone I really want to be with for a long time. Buy not being physical right off you'll feel better about yourself and know how he feels.
2007-09-11 17:12:26 · answer #3 · answered by driveitinyou 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Don't have sex with new guys. From my perspective, if I am really into a woman, I am not about getting physical right away. In fact, I am so amused by her personality that I dont' want things to get physical for a while. When sex is involved, it is easy for a guy to lose respect for a woman. Most guys that you will end up in a healthy relationship with, think the same way I do. Or, at least many of my friends feel the same way.
2007-09-11 17:07:50 · answer #4 · answered by Dan M 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
oh dear, what a common problem!! Men and there willys - they just don't think, do thet?!
Seriously, i know where you are coming from. I have been single for eight years now and have had a fair few of these one - nighters (some on purpose but thats another story!!) and it makes you feel rubbish but dust yourself down and start again.
I now work by the '24 hour rule', when a guy has spent 24 hours with me, i'm pretty sure he likes me for me. This does not mean sleep with him 24 hours after meeting him, but count each hour you are alone. A lunch is usually 1 hour (23 left to go..), a dinner and drink maybe 5 hours (18 left...), movies and dinner and drink maybe 7 hours.... see where i'm going?
Good luck
2007-09-11 17:13:43 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
The guy that really wants to be with you will wait before he rushes to bed. I waited a year before i slept with this one girl that i really liked...actually loved. A real guy will be interested in wha tyou have to offer, coversation, thoughts on subjects. ability to go out and have fun... things like that.. These are the more important factor instead of the bedroom. I'd tally him as a loss, more like a loser. Gotta get back on the horse and ride. Relationships are a tricky game. Gotta play it right. Wish you all the best!!
2007-09-11 17:11:06 · answer #6 · answered by PLATINUM_PLUS1 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
So you met one louse. Now, don't repeat that mistake.
No sex until you have a relationship. One date and some chattting at work is not a relationship. And it's best not
to date someone you work with. The louse might tell about
what he did, and it just makes things uncomfortable
all around. Good Luck!
2007-09-11 17:08:14 · answer #7 · answered by M S 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Just relax and try finding someone before you have sex with them! Try going on a date,talk,and just be yourself..then if you think that guy is right for you,then that is when you take it 2 the next level! Well..Good Luck!
2007-09-11 17:07:32 · answer #8 · answered by Blessed__ 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Try holding out just a little bit longer next time.
Aswell if I were you I would tell he just were he could go.
Treating you like that was wrong.
But really there is nothing you can do to prevent somthing like that some guy are just D**KS
2007-09-11 17:07:22 · answer #9 · answered by crazyjboy82 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Don't give in so easily, your job is to turn lust into love with your feminine ways. That is how true love works. Also, maybe look for a nice boy, that will treat you with respect. They might not be as attractive as the bad boys, but you will be better off finding one of them.
2007-09-11 17:05:29 · answer #10 · answered by Steve C 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋