We know a lot of people and would love for them to be at our wedding but we can't invite everyone to the reception.
2007-09-11 06:43:12 · 27 answers · asked by lulu 3 in Family & Relationships ➔ Weddings
That would be a definite etiquette faux pas. You would be sending the message, "You're important enough to invite to the ceremony, but not important enough to feed, unlike the people we invited to both." Invite people to both--not one or the other.
2007-09-11 06:55:33 · answer #1 · answered by Ms. X 6 · 13⤊ 1⤋
Hi and congratulations!
I am glad you are asking first BEFORE mailing out your invitations!
NO, NO, NO...you can't invite people only to the ceremony and not the reception. In etiquette terms, the ceremony is the "gift giving" portion - not the reception, so, in effect, you are telling people it's okay to come and bring and gift, but you are not invited to "the party." Everyone invited to the ceremony MUST ALSO be invited to the reception.
Now....it CAN BE done in reverse. You can have a family only or small wedding ceremony and invite more people to the reception, but not the other way around. Good luck!
2007-09-11 07:27:18 · answer #2 · answered by iloveweddings 7 · 2⤊ 1⤋
Gosh, back in the good old days, you invited people to your wedding/reception. But word of mouth would get out and you would have lots of sticky beaks come to see the wedding. It used to be normal to have extra wellwishers come to the wedding. People from the church congregation, friends, kids that kind of thing. All would be happy just to be there, to see what the bride wore, and to throw some confetti or rice....Now all of a sudden it is not allowed????
Weddings used to be a celebration of family and friends and all were invited. A joyous time to celebrate a couples union. Nowadays, we spend so much on the "perfect wedding" that we cannot afford to invite people who really should be there. I think weddings have lost something by travelling this path. There are so many rules and regulations, etiquette, where did all this come from??? Who exactly makes up the rules for weddings?? And what happens if we dont follow them??
I would not send invitations to the people not invited to the reception, and I certainly wouldnt invite someone that has to travel to only come to the wedding but not the reception, but when you see people you'd like to be at the wedding, just explain to them that your budget is limited, unfortunatly you cannot invite everyone but they are most welcome to come down to see the ceremony if they wish. And you would be honoured if they came....And maybe serve some punch and nibblies at the church for these people.
Good luck with your day.
2007-09-11 12:23:34 · answer #3 · answered by bluegirl6 6 · 0⤊ 1⤋
I have a friend who did just the opposite. It's your wedding, and you can do what you want... but I think that this leaves a LOT of room for hurt feelings. It did in her case. Someone that was invited to the reception only told me that they felt that the weren't special enough to share in her wedding, but that they were asked to bring gifts. Those invited to the wedding only might think that you don't mind sharing your cake with some friends, but they are not important enough. It would be better for all of your friends, family and acquaintances if you chose a different venue likely. No point in risking hurt feelings!
2016-05-17 06:42:04 · answer #4 · answered by juliana 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
usually, the ceremony is smaller than the reception if you need to cut people out somewhere. but you CAN do this if you do it in a nice way. be sure that anyone traveling from far away is invitied to the reception. the only people who should be allowed to the ceremony but not the reception are people who live close by but are not your direct family or close friends (church friends, friends of the family, etc)
also, you may want to create invitations for the ceremony and for the reception on seperate cards. then you can include the reception card with the invitations of some people without openly telling other they can't go.
2007-09-11 07:09:47 · answer #5 · answered by Erica S 4 · 0⤊ 3⤋
Techically, one doesn't invite people to church services. Since it's God's House, only God can issue invitations. But that isn't what you asked.
Usually this is done when there is a large circle of acquaintance, but a small private reception is preferred. One sends invitations to all and sundry, and encloses a small reception card in the invitations of the chosen few.
The problem with this is those NOT invited to the party will hear about it and think "Those Machevellian bastards like me enough to try to sqeeze a gift out of me, but not enough to provide a meal for me. I've been tricked!"
2007-09-11 07:29:04 · answer #6 · answered by kill_yr_television 7 · 5⤊ 1⤋
This is a BIG no-no. You invite only the same people to both. The people who witness your vows at the ceremony go on to celebrate with you at the reception.
2007-09-12 01:22:10 · answer #7 · answered by Lydia 7 · 0⤊ 1⤋
I think that is very rude I wouldn't appreciate getting an invitation like that I rather not b invited. At the reception is where you can talk and say hi to all your invites
2007-09-11 07:33:00 · answer #8 · answered by Mariana M 4 · 3⤊ 1⤋
The reason food and drink is provided at wedding receptions is basically to thank your guests for traveling to see your wedding and providing sustenance. Personally, if I were to receive an invitation to a wedding in the mail and it said I wasn't invited to the reception, I wouldn't waste my gas on going to EITHER event. If you can't invite everyone to both events, cut back on the invitation list.
2007-09-11 07:13:11 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 4⤊ 1⤋
There is no proper etiquette, because that is just not done. Tone down the costs of the reception and invite everyone, even if you have to have finger foods, cake and punch!
I would not attend a wedding if I wasn't invited to the reception, too. Sorry...
2007-09-11 06:55:59 · answer #10 · answered by Proud to be 59 7 · 13⤊ 2⤋
The Reception she follow after the weeding so they don't need no invitation. Unless the reception is gonna be at a later date.
2007-09-11 07:19:38 · answer #11 · answered by tessie35 3 · 0⤊ 2⤋