Long Distance Relationship advice please?

Question

Hi there, I am currently in a Long distance Relationship with a girl who is 23 and i am 24. she used to live in my city but relocated back to her mothers 86 miles away (2 hours drive). shes busy during the week working and we both have weekends but i am a student and i need to work 7-8 hours whenever i like at the weekend...i make my own hours. I plan on graduating and next summer moving near her. I know i am going to find it a bit of a strain every weekend to travel to see her so we agreed we stay over once a week rotational she come here and i see her. our parents are fine with it but our parents are retired. We will not get the chance to do our romantic stuff although things have been done at hers when her mother down stairs. Will she lose interest in LD relationship? I am in fear she will meet some one else as shes is very attractive. We keep in touch with texts and calls and visits...i went to meet her mum last week and saw thier house, we are both keen but how can i secure us?

shes married , seperated and filing for divorce but hes gone in the army and shes never to see him again. I am certain of that!!! am i pushing things?

Answer 1

Long distance relationship can be a blessing in disguise. Think about it. You get your privacy and space. She will never get a chance to complain that she wasted her time on you. She can never complain that she missed the fun with her friends because of you. Try to meet occasionally and you will never get "bored".

As for "will she lose interest in long distance relationship"? Well, if she has to lose interest, she will lose it even if you are living together. A break up just needs an excuse. My point is that "losing interest" has nothing to do with distance. A couple cam lose interest even when they are together.

Answer 2

You and she are trying to do something that is difficult at best. If you and she are committed to the relationship and it sounds like you are. I dont know about her. Ive dated some attractive women and they are never hard up for attention. I think you are thinking along thease lines when you say, How can i secure us. And the answer is you cant. My concern is that she is in a divorce and that alone is a red flag because most people when they are going thru such an experience their head is not quite right. They should wait a year after the divorce. She might develope a free spirit and wonder why she got right back into a nother relationship so fast. Especially if she is attractive. I know you are not going to break up and wait a year now that you are where you are in your relationship.I couldnt either.
Stay focused on your education, continue to see each other when you can. But keep in mind you could get very hurt. Good Luck

Answer 3

My relationship with my boyfriend started long distance, with him being in CA and I being in PA. We did it for about I'd say a year and a half. I have since moved in with him and we are very happy. I'm not going to lie, LDR's are very hard, but with lots and lots of communication (text, email, phone, Skype, and any others you can think of) it is possible to make it work! You must also have lots of faith and trust in each other. Yes, my boyfriend could've cheated on me and I would never know it, but I trusted him and I knew that I had a good man on my hands. He proved everyday that he was an honest, loyal, kind man. I knew he wouldn't hurt me like that. I did the same. We trusted each other, we were crazy about each other (and still are, almost 3 years later). We would text all day, everyday and talk on the phone. I flew out to see him the most and he'd visit me a couple times. We had faith in the relationship knowing that this is what we really wanted. We wanted to be together. If you need more advice, google LDR's and you will find lots of ways to communicate and keep the love alive. But, I will be totally honest with...you both must be 100% committed to each other and the relationship. If not, then yes, it will not survive. Lots of people cannot handle long distance relationships. I'm glad my boyfriend and I are proof that they can work, along with other couples that may have experienced the same thing. LDR's are hard, but with love, patience, communication and trust, it can work! P.S. Don't listen to those who say they can't...they obviously didn't have the key ingredients that are absolutely necessary for making a LDR work! Hope this helps, and best of luck to you :)

Answer 4

Hello. I currently in a LD for 11 months. We started dating on the first day we met and he went back to his home a few days after which is a three hour train ride away. Neither of us have a car and both low income. We are 22 and 20 and very much inlove.
Since you have the internet you can use that as means to talk to her every single day (providing she has access too). LD is very good relationship for people who like space and if you feel you cannot trust her because of her beauty then I would not bother. If the trust is solid hang on to it. The way I see if with my boyfriend is that, why pack all the things we want to do together in now, when we have the rest of our lifes to do it. And if it all works out remember you will be together one day in the same house and it is worth waiting for.

Answer 5

my question is this, why is her marriage ending, because of his deployment or are there other reasons. If it because he's over sea's than she has a lonliness issue which would make a long distance relasionship very hard.
On a personal note if it is because of his deployment, think how he must feel defending our freedom, being seperated from the woman he loves, to have her leave because she's lonley. A soldier wife is the hardest job there is, and can mean life and death of a soldier in a combat situation.
I know its probly not the case he's most likely sleeping with someone over there, but I'd look into it a little deeper.

Answer 6

You have every right to be worried. Long distance relationships are hard even on the best relationships. Sending her romantic letters, cards and emails will help. Calling her as frequently as you can afford and letting her know that you love her and thinking about her will also help. I think communication is the most important thing in relationships and you need to talk about how you feel and your fears together.
Good luck!
P.S. Saving money and renting a hotel room once in a while for romance, might be good too.

Answer 7

Sounds like a bad situation. In the long run this relationship will take a lot of maintenance- any l.d. one does. If you or she isn't up for that it's going to be a long year. If you want to make it work, you can, but know it will be wearing on both of you. It just depends on how much commitment you both have to the relationship. Also if she's in the process of a divorce she may want to be free of a serious relationship for awhile- hope you aren't a rebound.

Answer 8

It is SOOOO not true that long distance relationships won't work. Just to clear that up.

My husband and I lived 13 hours apart when we were dating. Since I said 'husband' it's safe to assume we're married, lol. Happily married.

It was tough, and it took a lot of work.....but if you REALLY want to be with someone the distance isn't going to make you lose interest. She'll only meet someone else if she's not serious about being with you in the first place.

Answer 9

Im currently in a LD with my GF who lives in Florida and i currently live in the uk it will be our 12 month anniversary saturday, I make trips over when i can and she is currently wanting to come over here but she is a student so it is difficult,

We speak every day on yahoo or skype,if you think a LD is difficult add an Internet romance, i met her for the first time on our 6 month anniversary...

Answer 10

I had a LD relationship in the past...I'll tell you my experience...I wanted to have him around me pretty much all the time, but couldn't be/c we lived so far away from each other, we didnt have the time to drive to ones house & hang out w/each other...We did hang out w/each other, but not as much as we wanted...so we ended the relationship be/c it was just a pain in the butt & talking to him isn't the same as hanging out w/him.

Im not saying that it's going to happen to you, i hope that it works out...if you 2 really love each other to make it work, then there's should be no problem, Im just stating my opinion on it.