In the last month he has moved back after leaving by his choice 9 months ago, his 17 yo 9th grade drop out gf is 4 months preg, he works about 15 hrs week with his mother as direct boss. When he left the first time I was relieved because he was smoking pot in the house and drinking in his room that he shares with my son (three years younger). His mom blamed me for him leaving and kept trying to convince him to come back because he really couldn't afford to live on his own or with roommates for that matter. Well, now he is back because he has dug himself into a financial mess with a baby on the way. I have asked his mother, my gf, what has he changed that he should be back in our house .. she says nothing, but, that he is still trying to figure things out. He has flunked out of comm. college, has no car so even his mom says how can he work more hours with no ride? I'm just disgusted with the whole mess but my gf seems to think I am making a mountain out of a molehill. Is the prob me?
2007-09-11 05:02:45 · 5 answers · asked by Subi 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
Get out of the relationship, dude, I mean really. What I would do is kick the sons *** and tell him not to come back until he fixed his life, or in a coffin (sounds harsh I know).
2007-09-11 05:21:47 · answer #1 · answered by Edwin H 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
There is a problem with both of you.
She is being a bad mother by letting her adult son use her (and you) this way. He will never grow up if she keeps taking care of him. And he needs to grow up, because he is 19 and a father. He won't starve if she kicks him out.
You are being a bad father if you allow somebody to smoke pot in your house, in which your minor son lives.
2007-09-11 14:40:35 · answer #2 · answered by The First Dragon 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
no the problem is not you however the best solution is to remove your son from this home before he follows her sons path. if you do nothing to fix this you will be supporting both sons and all the grand kids for a long time to come. win this fight now or leave now but do something.
2007-09-11 12:22:39 · answer #3 · answered by tott1 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
No the problem is not you. It's her. YOu need to get out of this situation and take your son somewhere else. She's NOT going to change and this situation is NOT going to change....I'd move on and leave it the way it is!
2007-09-11 12:10:44 · answer #4 · answered by So you think you know me!? 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think you can use this.
The 'Doc as he calls himself in this website (blog rather) claims he can give sincere advice. the link is given below. He calls himself the relationship doctor. Join his mailing list and send him a detailed mail regarding your problem.
I think its worth a look-see. Won't do no harm.
Cheers!!
http://relationship-doctor.blogspot.com
2007-09-11 12:12:04 · answer #5 · answered by AYOOZe 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋