I was supposed to get married this year, But a new arrival has set us back. Now the family wants to know when we are getting married. If we get married this year it will be a small wedding due to fiancial difficulties. If we wait it may be a better wedding. Not really sure what to do?
2007-09-11 04:27:04 · 19 answers · asked by nightwater1985 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Weddings
What do you mean by "new arrival" Did you have a baby? If you did and you have been together for 5 years, I would just go ahead and have a smaller wedding.
If you dont't have a child and you two want to have a bigger wedding, then give it until this time next year. If NO wedding happens by then, it's never going to happen.
Five years is a long time for a couple to be together w/ no set wedding date.
2007-09-11 04:32:23 · answer #1 · answered by Answer Girl 2007 5 · 7⤊ 0⤋
I suggest the small inexpensive wedding. Put the money you would be saving up for a wedding for your son or daughter's college education, and a down payment on a house or condo, if you're renting. Now that you have your child, the wedding falls back on the list of priorities.
If you wait until you can afford the more expensive wedding, you might be waiting a long time, considering what your priorities are (or should be). Meanwhile, your child is growing up with 2 unmarried parents. Not that that can't be successfully done, but if you have the extremely high level of commitment that is healthiest for raising a child, I think it's better to have the highest level of legal commitment as well. And as so many others have pointed out, the marriage is far more important than the wedding.
2007-09-11 13:28:35 · answer #2 · answered by Ms. X 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Congrats on both the new arrival and being with your man for 5 years. I would just get married now if you have a child you can put your money to better use, it's not going to be cheap. You say if you wait it "may" be a better wedding. why wait you don't know for sure if it will be any different in a year from now or having it now.
What is most important is that you are with and marry your boyfriend. The most important thing isn't the actual wedding day.
2007-09-11 13:19:42 · answer #3 · answered by Butterfly 5 · 2⤊ 0⤋
It depends on what your priorities are. If being married isn't a real priority, but having a wedding IS - then wait until you are able to have the wedding that you want (however long it might take). For me personally, BEING married was the point, and the "wedding" was just the way to get there; so we got married without much pomp or planning, when we felt we wanted to be married. However, if you've been together for 5 years, and it's working fine for you, perhaps you don't need to get married at all? I don't know. No one says you MUST be married in order to have a functional relationship.
2007-09-11 11:49:39 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
It is all up to the both of you. Do you want a nice wedding or an okay wedding. If your not in a hurry just save up some money so you guys can have a nice wedding. It doesn't have to be big either. I think small and initmate is a lot more romantic and much more meaningful than a 200 guest wedding.
2007-09-11 21:12:33 · answer #5 · answered by TJ 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think the important thing is to get married, NOT to have the big ceremony with bigger reception. If you're putting off getting married due to financial reasons, you'll always put it off, because your financial situation will never improve, especially if you now have a child together.
Sometimes though, people look for an excuse not to do something that they really don't want to do, if that makes any sense. Like you're saying you don't have the money to get married, but you're really not sure about getting married to begin with. Look at yourself carefully, and see what the REAL reason is behind why you haven't been willing to make that further committment to each other yet. If you're really wanting to be married, you won't let money stop you.
2007-09-11 11:43:47 · answer #6 · answered by basketcase88 7 · 4⤊ 0⤋
If you wait until the "perfect" time to get married, you will never get married. There is never a perfect time. If you are both ready to get married, then start planning the ceremony that is within your means. If you are both not willing to do that, then there is really something else at play here and the finances are just the excuse. A big elaborate wedding is never a necessity.
2007-09-11 13:11:55 · answer #7 · answered by Proud Momma 6 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Me personally, I feel that if you want to have a big wedding and have everything that you want included in the wedding that it's best to wait. I would say just wait until your finances are back up to par so you could have the wedding that you want. Don't just settle for less than what you want because it's been 5 years and your family is asking when it's going to happen.
2007-09-11 12:49:46 · answer #8 · answered by Jen 4 · 1⤊ 1⤋
Ultimately it is up to you. What kind of wedding do you want?? Small or large?? Simple or ornate?? Why not do a small destination wedding, like an all-inclusive trip to Jamaica (or somewhere tropical/fun) for you and your fiance. Then, whoever has the money to join you can come along and witness. Maybe have a larger BBQ/picnic when you come back...tell everyone to bring a dish to pass.
2007-09-11 11:35:28 · answer #9 · answered by Mrs. June 6th, 2009 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I echo the comments in the first reply.
If you want to get married, why wait just to have a big wedding? It's the marriage that counts, not the wedding day.
2007-09-11 11:57:03 · answer #10 · answered by tink 6 · 3⤊ 0⤋