I had recently moved back in with my mom and sister. I have my son half the week per a custody agreement with his mom. Lately, I have been taking a lot of negative actions from my family. They constantly tell me that my stuff is in their way and I'm lucky I live there. They try to take over my life with my son at times and tell me that they will take him and raise him because they don't think I am a good enough father. My girlfriend sees this and she gets upset because she knows that is not the case. I need to move out of this situation but I don't have money saved to leave right now. I don't know if a shelter is a good place to go to save money while I am working to afford a new place to live. I have tried talking to my family about this on numerous occassions and it changes for a few days and then it's back to the same stuff. Any advice would help.
2007-09-11 02:58:39 · 3 answers · asked by kws504 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
You are living in someone else's home. Are you doing everything that you can to make sure they are not inconvienced? If your "stuff" is in the way, that's somewhat of an indicator that you aren't doing all you can.
Families who have to live together even for short times find that its not easy for adults to live together. You are the one who moved in, its up to you to find a solution. However I don't think that moving out is the solution. I think you will find living in a shelter will simply drive you down farther, and that's now what you need to do.
Create a plan of action. If you are not paying anything to your mother, then start even if its just alittle. If you are, then try to do something else, like buy groceries or put gas in her car. If you can't afford that, then take on the responsibility of something major around the house, big projects that haven't been done, the yardwork, cleaning her car or maintainence, even cooking and cleaning. I'll assume you are picking up after yourself and doing your own laundry, but if not, then you need to be doing so.
When your son is there, you need to be full time dad, and focus on him. If you don't know how to be a parent, then do some research(since you are obviously online) and learn. Don't put your mom in the position of covering for you, make sure you are completely responsible for your son. That's what makes a good father, personal responsibility.
Your g/f needs to stay out of your family business, and its up to you to keep the drama away from her. You are dependent on your mom right now, and in respect to that, you need to make sure you are not a burden.
You are lucky to be there. Be sure you are thanking her, not only verbally but in what you do. If you do this, you will gain the time you need to get your act together to be able to be on your own again. Have some patience and take responsibility without demanding it be reciprical. Fix your own "house" first before you expect other to fix theirs. Good luck.
2007-09-11 03:28:30 · answer #1 · answered by tjnstlouismo 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sounds like a tough situation. Have you perhaps looked into sharing rent with someone?
2007-09-11 10:07:57 · answer #2 · answered by ♥sick n tired♥ 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
go ahead
2007-09-11 10:10:44 · answer #3 · answered by keral 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋