Any families out there that live in an apartment and are happy?

Question

Ok, so heres the story. . I am 20 years old my husband is 22. He is maintance at our apartment complex for 4 years now and i babysit. Our combined income is 700/ week. Now to me that sounds like alot but its not. Our rent is only 320 b/c he works there. We want to start a family in the next year or two and have a very nice cozy aparment w/ 2 bedrooms and just about everything you could dream of having, computer, big tvs, huge king beds and all new kitchen appliances. My thing is, everyone keeps telling us we are married and we need to have a house before having children. I personally dont want a house, i mean of course i do but i dont want to work 50 hours a week to barelly make my mortage, and not be able to enjoy family time and shopping and having money to spare. Does this sound dumb? I wish my family would get off my back of my husband geting a house for us, i just dont see us getting one if we ever do for atleast another 10-20 years. any1 w/ expierence on apartment living?

I babysit for a family w/ 3 children and the mom and dad bring in about 3000 a week, and live in a 600,000 dollar house, and honestly they seem miserable. They are never home and their kids never see them and the house is sooo dirty its disgusting bc shes never home to clean it, and they basically pay me to watch the baby while the 2 kids are at school. I just dont want to be like that, i'd rather work part time and live in an apartment to be able to spend time w/ my kids and have fun w/ life, also i didn't graduate from school so i wont be doing much else w/ my life but just getting by. My husband doesnt drive & he dropped out of college bc his financial aid cancelled when he messed up his papers.

thx everyone so far, i am going to get my ged by the next of this year and my husbands looking into going back to school in jan... when it starts up again. & yes i am happy w/ the apartment, theres 7 other houses in our apartment, and one is his dad, one is his best friends, and the others are very very nice people and we all know eachother, and we have parties and everything sooo loud and no1 can even hear us they've said next door, and also we are allowed to paint any colors, wallpaper, put new flooring in, basically anything we want since he and his dad and grandpa are the 3 maintance men there. We are going to wait another year to have a child but i want to do it while im young, i really loved growing up with a young mom, his mom was 60 when he was 21 and she passed away a year ago and i just wanna wait till the timing is perfect.

Answer 1

There is nothing wrong with living in an apartment. I just moved from an apartment where we'd lived (3 kids) for 4 years. Don't let them bother you. I agree with you that family is tons more important than income and house size. Next time they bother you, change the subject or ignore them. If it works for you and your spouse, other people need to butt out. Not everyone wants the hassle of house repairs, yard maintanance, and a mortgage.

Answer 2

Well no hard feelings but I don't think having a family should be your first priority right now. You and him are both able to better yourself do to not having children already. You should go get you GED, and go to a community college and work from there. Your husband can always get his financial aide corrected, and I know that for a fact. The education you both have will not support a family comfortably. You can always get a decent job part time. I never cared too much about house, but now that I have a family Apartment living is not the ideal thing. My child doesn't have a hard to play in, you don't know all the wierdo's and their are so many people crammed in to a small area. You know everyone's buisness. Go back to school. Not to mention in an apt you just through money away... invest it into a house.

Answer 3

I lived in apartments for years, and had 3 kids. 5 of us plus a dog lived in a 900 sq ft 3 BR apt, and it was nice. We were a little strapped for space, but where we lived it was all we could afford. I wanted a house so bad. We finally got one 2 years ago and though it's nice to have a yard and all, I will admit that I miss being in an apartment.
Having the situation you have, a nice apartment, low rent, you are already staying home and making money, I wouldn't change a thing. Wait until your family outgrows your apartment - and then maybe just get a bigger one.
A HOUSE doesn't make a family! It doesn't make you more married. Apartment living works for some people. Don't let your family talk you into something you don't want. It's not like they will be the ones paying your mortgage!
Good luck!

Answer 4

Stop listening to other people. People who tell you that you need to do certain things to raise children are full of baloney. Children do not care where they are raised, what they care about is being loved, safe, warm, fed and educated. Anyone can be a good parent in any environment, having to have a house is an advertising ploy by the mortgage industry and as we can see with all the home foreclosures, its not for everyone.

Sounds like you have a great arrangement that works for your family, so stick to it. You might find that you need a bigger apartment, babies and children come with so much stuff, you literally will be tripping over it for years. But if you keep the stuff to a minimum and are well organized, you will do just fine.

I raised my girls in two different apartments and I loved them. We only bought a house when they were in high school because my then husband worked for himself and we needed it for tax purposes. Now everyone is gone, even the family dog and I am living in an 8 room, two story house where I haven't even been on the second floor in 6 months. Not to mention everyone stores what they don't want in my basement. I'd love to sell it and move but the housing market is horrible here for sellers.

Do what you want for your family. Part of being a grown up is making up your own mind. Btw, my daughters, raised in an apartments, are now graduate students working on their Masters, working fulltime jobs and are really nice well adjusted young women. You won't regret it, good luck.

After reading some of the other answers, I wanted to add my two cents. You need to get your GED and try to go to community college. You will be a much better parent if you don't feel stupid raising your kids. A parent who feels that they aren't as smart as their kids loss their self esteem and that effects their parenting. You don't have to be a lawyer or a doctor, but if something happens to your husband (my dad died when he was 25, it happens), you need a way to support them and yourself. And your husband needs to go to financial aid or his counselor at school and ask them to help him straighten his paperwork out. That's what they are there for, its their job. He needs to be able to support a family and he will feel better about it if he has a decent job with benefits. What happens if you have a special needs child and no health insurance? Those are the kind of things that happen in life and you have to be prepared. Please wait on the kids, get your ducks in a row first so that you can be a really good mom cause you feel good about what you have to offer to your kids. I was 30 and never regretted waiting.

Answer 5

You're right. A house and the things money can buy don't make one happy automatically. Being happy comes more from a realization that what you have is good. If you're content with where you are as a family then you can stop listening to anyone else's advice on this issue and make your own choices.

Oh, and we've also raised our family in apartments off and on. It's not a bad life as long as you're content with it. Buying your own house also doesn't have to be the stressful experience you're seeing with the family you know though. Just stay within your means when you're looking at property. But neither way is more right than the other.

And please encourage your husband to resubmit his papers for financial aid. You can get a much better job with a degree than you can without.

Answer 6

There is nothing at all wrong with living in an apt. with a family. You dont need a house. True. My only suggestion would be to maybe further your education before you have a child. Here is why. If for some reason, your hubby loses his maint. job, your family will have something of a safety net to fall into. I know from experience that relying on one person is risky. ( like what if he is injured or gets fired). You could get a fast education ( before a baby) in something that would allow you to get a job if you had to. But still stay home with your babies and have a happy life. Just have a safety net for you and your kids ( and hubby too). But as for living in an apt., nothing wrong with it. People do it all the time. good-luck :))

Answer 7

I was never happy living in an apt. with my children. It was great when we only had one now we have four and live in a house out in the country on a farm. You and your and husband will do fine with the apt. I think you guys should wait a little bit for trying to have kids. You don't sound dumb, your just telling your family how you feel and believe me you won't have any extra money when the new baby comes because that money will be used for the baby. Good luck.

Answer 8

yep i agree with you, you don;t have to buy a house to start a family
& there also some cheap homes to so just relax & take your time, if you see anything nice & cheap then buy it