Obviously, this question is for parents with more than one child. My husband and I have decided to try for a second child. We have just approached 30 years old and our daughter is now 2 1/2 years old. We have always wanted two children fairly close in age, but now that we've come this far, I'm SCARED. I love my daughter with all of my heart. She is the best thing that's ever happened to me. What happens when she has a sibling? We do talk to her about it and she seems as if she wants to be a big sister. She loves babies and I think that she will want to help out as much as she can. Of course, she will no longer be the center of attention. I am rambling on and on.... I guess I just need some reassurance from someone who has been through this. Were you as scared as I am about it and how did you make things easier?
2007-09-10 08:45:09 · 10 answers · asked by ticktock 7 in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Parenting
I am terrified. I'm also 30 and have a 2 1/2 year old. Number 2 is due in February and I have the same exact fears you have. I'm afraid I won't be able to love the next one this much. How could I? My son is my world. I hope these feelings are normal!!
2007-09-10 08:52:05 · answer #1 · answered by Nina Lee 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I wasn't scared at all...my boys are almost 5 years apart and I was ready for another one. I think your daughter will love being the big sister. The main challenge I have had now is that there is some sibling rivalry and my two boys get into it with each other...but I feel that is pretty normal. Most of it is because my oldest doesn't like his little brother following him around and trying to be "just like' him...which you would think he would be flattered...but it's annoying to him. Then, my youngest is very jealous and tries very hard to be better than his big brother at everything and can't (due to he's so much younger) and sometimes resents his big brother for it. But...in the long run...I think it's great to have siblings and when they are adults,. they will have each other.....I look at my sisters and my relationship now and we are so close...I sometimes don't know what I would do without the two of them...they are my best friends. I hope my sons can feel the same way about each other when they get older. I think the age difference will be a good one. Good luck!
2007-09-10 20:16:06 · answer #2 · answered by ♥ Liz ♫ 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
My daughter is going to be 4 in October and my son will be 2 in November so they are 2 years and 1 month apart in age. I enjoyed to first 2 years it was just my daughter, spoiling her and giving her lots of attention. My husband and I discussed having another child so our kids would be close in age and be able to play with each other. My daughter also loves babies and would help anytime I would babysit for an infant. I never really thought of her not getting all the attention when we decided to have our 2nd child. I was actually sad that I had just got back my figure and pre-pregnancy weight and now was going to be pregnant again and have to start all over :( (kind of selfish) My daughter has been great with her brother. We talked alot about a new baby in our house and she never got jealous of him. We give both our children equal attention and spend lots of one-on-one time with both of them. We no longer spoil our daughter but the grandparents have taken on that role for both our kids.
2007-09-10 15:57:59 · answer #3 · answered by blue eyes 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I have two 6 and 20 months... The 6 year old loves being a big sister and the 20 month old runs around the house babbling SISSY, SISSY..... No reason to be scared... You will find the love required for both is already there.... Just try to set up some special time for the oldest since you will spend more time with the baby.... Therefore every day and once a few hours each weekend should be set aside for the oldest if she wants alone time with you and/or your husband...
2007-09-10 15:56:49 · answer #4 · answered by Joey_Pit 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I have three daughters, and they are all wonderful and different! I thank God for all three of them. It's hard to explain but I don't love one more than the other, I have an abundance of love for each of them. I appreciate their unique gifts and talents and look forward to learning more about them as they grow. Of course my oldest went from being the only princess and that took her all of 10 seconds to get over. They are 10,6 and 4 and for the most part they are the best of friends, of course the 4 and 6 y/o are alot closer because of their age. I would just tell you quit worrying so much. Things work themselves out if you are not always worrying and having to have things just perfect. Life is messy and things aren't always the way we imagine them, and as long as you grasp that, welcoming a second child into your family shouldn't be a huge deal. Best wishes and blessings!
2007-09-10 15:55:09 · answer #5 · answered by dixi 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
My daughter was 2 when we had our second. She has a maternal instinct. I know that sounds weird, but she loved having someone to look after. She's 11, and she's still taking care of her lil' sis and her 5 yr. old brother.
It's normal to feel the way you do, but your daughter seems to enjoy the idea. And having them close in age is a good thing. Get all that diaper stuff out of the way. Your daughter will adjust to the change. Kids will normally tell you if they dislike something, so if she says she's fine, trust her.
Good luck!
2007-09-10 15:55:56 · answer #6 · answered by lawstudntbynite 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
yes it is kinda scary u'll have 2 kids under the age of 4. but u make the oldest ur special helper with the younger one. my brother n i are 2.5 - 2-75 years apart and its a great age difference. uve come so far. ur daughter deserves a sibling. it will be ok. u will be nervous, uve done this onece u can do it again. everything will be fine. stressful n overwhlming at times. so find a good relative or babysitter. but this is completely normal.
heres a webiste:
http://parents.berkeley.edu/advice/pregnancy/second.html
2007-09-10 15:54:34 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
You will be a very good parent to both of your little ones because you are aware of what might happen and won't let it happen. Nothing will change except you will have 2 to love. Your young one is going to be fine because what you can't provide because you're busy with baby, daddy will pick up when he gets home.
2007-09-10 16:00:34 · answer #8 · answered by gma 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yes, I am!! I have 2 now but they are 13 years apart so it didn't worry me. But now our third is coming and will be only 19 month syounger than the second. I am TERRIFIED of how he will react, as he is really too young to understand and has been quite spoiled as we thought we weren't havign anymore!
2007-09-10 15:51:49 · answer #9 · answered by Betsy 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Don't be scared. I have two children, two years apart in age. Your children will take their cue from you and if you are relaxed about it, they will be too. No need to have your little mite counselled...just go for it. You won't have to divide your love up either, it gets doubled :)
It's just the best thing in the world.
2007-09-10 15:54:13 · answer #10 · answered by retro_girl34 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋