Why do i encounter so much resistance from others because i want to experience my pain in silence and prayer?

Question

I am currently going through a separation and it has brought alot of pain and anguish to the forefront. I have given up alcohol and drugs because i want to feel this pain. And I am experiencing some really powerful and deep insights after these boughts of pain. I would like to and have the complete ability to spend hours in meditation and prayer, self reflection..and I hear the voices of my parents telling me that its not good to isolate myself and such. Well it's not like I am going off to the mountain tops of India. I dont have kids or anything. I am off work for a while. And I just want to go into the pain and really feel it and find out what i am made of. But I hear those voices saying i am running from the world. But am not. Anyone have an opinion? Thank you

Answer 1

emotional masochism! enjoy!

Answer 2

All who go through a separation will experience pain, but not in silence and prayer. It will indeed bring anguish to the forefront.

It sounds like the type of separation you are experiencing is good for your soul, embrace it, and thank God for the pain, for he is saving you from your torment.

Isolate yourself from the alcohol and drugs, and do not defile the Temple of the Body any longer. If you smoke, give that up also. God calls you, and everyone who has an ear to hear, to his Kingdom.

Answer 3

I think what you are doing (facing your pain) is admirable. I think people worry alot about depression. Your folks are probably concerned about this and worry that you will hurt yourself. It may help to go into more of an explanation as to what you are doing so they won't worry. Also, you should ask yourself if you are running or isolating in order to avoid more pain. You can achieve a balance in healing through your meditation as well as with connecting with others and allowing yourself to laugh and have fun. I wish you the very best in your journey. Peace.

Answer 4

You might be enriched by some of the writings of Steven Levine. ("Who Dies?", I recall, is the name of one of his books.) He's a very intelligent and sensitive author, and has done a great deal of meditative study and work as a death and dying grief counselor.

Balance is always a key. Some folks who are more on the obsessive side (I don't mean to say you are) will benefit by literally scheduling times in the day they will devote to considering their worries.

But the willingness to actually FEEL I think is admirable and healthy.

(Steven Levine, incidentally, once had a physician surruptiously administer him a pain killer -- against his wishes -- when he was having a kidney stone, because the doctor just couldn't believe Steven was genuinely interested in exploring the sensations of pain.)
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Answer 5

The voices are coming from your own subconscious. Ignore them. Do whatever you feel you need to do right now. It sounds like you want to feel the pain to search inside yourself and get to know yourself. That is a good thing. I think if more people would do that, they wouldn't turn to alcohol and drugs to numb their painful past experiences. I can totally see why you would want to be alone right now. Only you know what you need to do to get through this hard time and heal. Don't take stock in voices. The Lord taught me that a long time ago. Just keep praying and read your bible. He'll get you through this. (((((((hugs))))))))

Answer 6

You are demonstrating a method to cope with your personal pain that is not readily accepted by mainstream society. You do well in savoring the effects of your separation! You have gone the hardest route and I commend you for it! Most people would wallow in self pity and drown their sorrow in a bottle of booze or some other artificial way of healing. Don't worry about what others say and deal with your pain the way everyone should!

Answer 7

It hurts more to run from your pain than it does to face it, so turn your face into the fire I say. And if it keeps you off drugs and booze, so much the better. Your approach is just an unusually eastern one, and that plus that you aren't working has the parents worried. Just tell them you'll contact them on a particular schedule, and do it, so they won't worry.

Answer 8

"going into the pain" is not good, we "get through it" to
what is true - pain is "true" but not the "truth" - truth goes
much deeper and broader than pain and ends up
covering, abolishing pain.
Your circumstances can't always tell you who you are.
We conquer pain and death through the love of the
Lord - that is what we do.
It's ok to have times alone, how you spend
that time is important, however, sometimes we
need wisdom from others here and there to
get through the pain and sadness.
It is a step by step process.
Be real, have hope also.
Learn what to have hope for - that is finding truth

Answer 9

Divorce is one of the most difficult things a human being can experience in life. By isolating yourself you risk traveling down a very dangerous road. This road may lead to a place you will have tremendous difficulty pulling yourself out of. I think it would be a good idea to at least talk to someone in order to be sure you stay sane.

Answer 10

The only way out of pain is to run right through--Dave Mustaine

If that is what you need to do then don't worry about what others think and be willing to what it takes to allow yourself that time of meditation and reflection.

Answer 11

Maybe your parents are just concerned about you. A lot of people who are depressed cut people off and end up harming themselves. I think you need alone time, we all do, but don't totally isolate yourself. Obviously there are people who love you and want to be there for you during this difficult time. Let them!