Do you think I'm ready for another child?

Question

I have a 2 year old daughter and me and my husband want another child maybe next year. The thing is I feel as though I hold my daughter back sometimes. Like we never take her food shopping as we do a monthly shop taking up to 2 hours, I rarely take her to town just because I don't need to go. We do go to the park a few times a week and to feed the ducks and she's very happy when we're out. I think if I cant cope with her how am I going to cope with another child? My husband, his parents and my parents all say I'm a good mum but I feel as though I'm holding her back. I think my problem is mentally.

Sorry if you don't understand what I'm trying to say, it's difficult to express what I'm feeling in my head. I'm 24

Answer 1

If you want another child, go for it! Maybe having another baby at home would keep you from feeling so bad for not taking your daughter out and it would give you and her both more things to do at home(caring for the baby). Something else you could do is enroll her in daycare or preschool for 2 days a week. It would be great for her to get out and about and be around other little kids and it would give (you) her momma time for herself. That way when you have time with her you will be more likely to wanna do things with her. Maybe you could take a mommy and me class, or put her in swimming lessons. something you could both enjoy together.

Answer 2

Honey if u feel topped off with pressure you need to vent in a positive way. Do you work ? Are u a stay at home mom ? You also need to have some precious time for "you" in order to give your best to your daughter.
I think you need to explore yourself a lil more before engaging in having another child, since your daughter is a toddler right now and she demands attention too.
I would advice you to join a Club in an activity you love, you can assist and your hubby watch your dd in that moment, or you can join a Club together with your daughter, so she has activities with other kids her age, and so that you also meet other parents or mommies, to share similar interests with. You have to be happy with the Life you have now, in order to make others happy, but you are important, and if u are not okay no one else in the family will be. Take the time to read children psychology books, motivational readings too , this has helped me out a big deal, I am a single mom to an 8 yr old boy, I have raised him on my own, with NO help from no one., I've tried too see options, for growth for me and him, he is a charming smart boy, and I am very happy I stimulated him alot since he was a baby with diverse activities. If you have a Gymboree near you, I highly reccomend that place so you can play with your dd and stimulate her intellect at the same time. Going to the park as u are doing is great, outdoor activities are always a plus. Enjoy your dd, enjoy your hubby, inform yourself, grow emotionally and spiritually, u will start to feel much better in time, and then you can think about having another baby, when u feel less pressured and more calm and happy with Life., Take care !

Answer 3

Hi there,

only you can answer whether you are ready for another child.
They are hard work, especially at two when they demand so much attention, have tantrums, require the dreaded potty training etc.

Don't be too hard on yourself though, you don't need to be a perfect parent, we all have our good and bad days - my daughter is 2 also and we are going through potty training and it is really trying my patience. Like you, I don't often stimulate my child as much as I can, but I do my best for her and that's all you can do.

I never thought I'd be married and have 2 kids by the age of 29, and sometimes my friends who are out partying every weekend seem to have such a better life - but do they really - I remember how sad and hollow that life style was and nothing gives you as much fun, laugh etc as your beautiful children - so you just need to change the way you think about things, be happy with your situation - loads of people would love to be in your position hand have their own children!

God bless,

Sophia

Answer 4

I have an 11 month old and found out I was pregnant again when she was 7 months old. However, I ended up losing the baby when I was a little over 3 months along. I cried and cried when I FOUND OUT I was pregnant because it was "so soon". However, I have now realized that God has His own timing in everything. Every child is a blessing and if He blesses you with one He will give you the strength and energy to take care of both of your children. God bless you in your decision and just know that you are not a "bad mother" for not taking your child places all of the time. It's not "where" you take her.. it's the fact that you are spending time with her. Whether it be at home or at the park. Good luck to you in your decision!

Answer 5

why dont you want to take her out...is it because you dont want to deal with her?? if this is the case, i would hold off on another child for a few years!! that way she'll be a little older and she could help out with the new baby!! its a HUGE transition from 1 baby to 2 babies!! its MUCH harder...trust me! i have a 4 year old and a 2 year old...i wouldnt change a thing...but it is stressful!

Answer 6

Someone once told me about kids: 1 is 1 , 2 is 4. Meaning 2 was alot harder, they were right. If you feel your not ready wait a couple of years.

Answer 7

lets put it this way if you feel you can't cope with it then you can't . i mean you shoudl be taking her where you go all the time period. there is no need to have sitter and stuff as you have probably read sitters are bad and probably you use the mom which is good but if you ca't deal with one i am sure you can't now have antoher that close together. goo dluck

Answer 8

you can obviously feel you are not ready, so why have another one just yet? whats the rush? you're family will not be the ones looking after them 24/7, it will be you, so make sure you are 100% ready

Answer 9

go for it, every child is a blessing