been with my bf for 3 years now. we don't live together yet and i have 3 little girls part-time that he loves very much and often babysits for me while i run errands.
we've had major issues in the past b/c i have PMDD and wasn't diagnosed with it up until 3 months ago. i am now taking medication and saw a counselor for 2 months to learn coping skills. this was the first month that i was symptom free and our relationship was great.
about a month ago, we got into a HUGE fight (almost broke up) right before he left to go to his grandpa's funeral in chicago. this was one of many before i got better. he's taken space from me (last time was about 1.5 years ago and we actually broke up for 3 weeks). while he was in chicago-i called him but he didnt answer and i left him a voicemail but sounded angry to him when he checked it so he didnt call back b/c he said he would have broke up w/me. instead he called a girl from work. more below please read...
2007-09-09 20:59:58 · 7 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
he got this girls # about 2 years ago partially b/c she helps bring him the broken planes from the flightline that he needs to fix and he has to call her to tell her when she can bring them and also partially b/c he was interested in her when we were broken up. he said it was just based off of looks though b/c as she was handing him her # she lit a cigarette which made him lose interest (he hates smokers,drinkers,and lots of piercings-he found out later she drinks heavily and got her tongue and nose peirced a month after he got her #). so he never called her.
he said he called her while in Chicago b/c he needed someone to talk to b/c he wanted to call me but was afraid we'd fight and break up. he talked w/her for almost 2 hours (he said she did most of the talking about how she hated her life,work,etc). he never mentioned me to her and they never talked again after that day-this was a month ago.
she called him on friday and he immediately told her he had a gf...
2007-09-09 21:03:44 · update #1
he told her "my girlfriend is over and we're having dinner so I should probably go." she said ok and they hung up. i started to get upset b/c girls never call him and that's when he told me the whole story about what happened. i got really upset and tried to leave his house and break up with him. he begged me to stay saying nothing ever happened between them-he just wanted someone to talk to and chose her b/c he knew she wouldn't be a threat b/c he had no interest in her. he said his guys friends would make fun of him. he then showed me his phone records online and it proved they had only talked the one time. he then told me he would call her back and tell her never to call him again and i could ask her what went on between them. i said no b/c i wanted to trust him.
he feels really bad about it and said he never meant to hurt me b/c i'm his everything. but he said my PMDD at the time pushed him over the edge. he said once he heard her life story-he realized what he had w/me.
????
2007-09-09 21:07:12 · update #2
I don't know what PMDD is, but just leave him and find someone else. He has taken up too much of your time.
2007-09-09 21:04:13 · answer #1 · answered by shardf 5 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Give him the benefit of the doubt. Your relationship has been a rollercoaster until just recently. Give it a chance to develop properly before involving yourself in another dramatic situation. If he is not being honest with you, you will soon be able to tell, I promise. We always figure it out. It is that gut instinct we have. In the meantime, concentrate on repairing the damage that the PMDD caused, and work on rebuilding the relationship. He couldn't be too bad, as he tried to work things out after the PMDD was under control.
2007-09-10 04:12:35 · answer #2 · answered by PEGGY S 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I see what you mean... but sometimes it helps talking to someone else who isnt as connected to the situation as you would be. He could have talked to some complete stranger as well, but maybe he knew that she would listen. It seems like he is going through a rough time at the moment, and he didnt want to bother you while you are going through your things. At the moment you are both dealing with huge emotional stuff and naturally that clashes. I think he just took the safer way out rather than having another fight and let you deal with your issues in your own time without you having to worry about him too much. Give it time and talk about it (sensibly!) when he gets back and I'm sure it will all work out.
Good luck!
2007-09-10 04:08:41 · answer #3 · answered by Bex 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You argued with him the day before he went to his Grandfathers funeral? Even if you do have PMDD it sounds a little harsh to me. Give him some time to think his emotions through and see how he feels after. Although you may have problems you can't use them as an excuse for everything.
2007-09-10 04:10:34 · answer #4 · answered by SR13 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Look, he is just trying to meet one of his most basic needs. He needs a woman to talk to when he's having problems. That woman should be you. Like it or not, you guys are having big problems if he's calling another woman for this. Ask him why he felt the need to call another woman instead of talking to you to work this out? And then, Don't take this wrong but, you might need to just shut up and really listen to the answer. That could be the entire problem. You can't talk to someone who won't listen and it seems that all he's looking for is someone who will. Think about it.
2007-09-10 04:13:06 · answer #5 · answered by B. Nowlin 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yes I think you should believe him simply because he told you the truth. Everything happens for a reason and if he went ahead and told you what had happened than if I were you I would marry that man.
2007-09-10 04:12:50 · answer #6 · answered by casey p 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If she cheating you with other relationship, leave him. if not, stay focus on him and try to always fulfill or follow his steps
2007-09-10 04:23:11 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋