What is wrong with me? HELP!!! PLEASE!!!!?

Question

Okay, well for starters, i am 17 years old, currently been given a year out from school due to many complications. I am seeing a psychologist, once a week but i still don't know what the problem is or how to sort it. I have separate bouts of uncontrollable anger, aggression and violence and severe depression and feeling almost suicidal. For reasons that i don't want to get into there is this guy who i would not hesitate in hospitalizing (for at least 6 months) the very next time i see him. I also have a girlfriend whom i have been with for just over eight months and we have always seemed really happy together, but right now i don't know whats going on, i just don't act the way i usually do when I'm around her, she's noticed it too and it's really worrying her and she's been worrying that I'm going to break up with her, which is the last thing i would ever want to do. I have told her that i love her and sure as hell meant it. But I'm not sure i do now. I just don't feel the same person.

I want to love my girlfriend. I do love her, but i don't know i just don't feel the same, i know i'd want to die if anything happened between us. HELP!!!!

i didn't ask this question to get abuse, this isn't about strength or weakness. You have no idea what mental problems do to people. So either have some consideraiton or F*CK OFF you sick freaks!!!

I'm am about as anti Christian as you can get, so don't feed me all this praying garbage

Oh and i'm not on meds (yet)

I do apologize to any Christians who may take offense to what i said, but i am very anti-religion not just Christian, and i hate it when people preach religion to me - as if they are trying to force it down my throat. Sorry

I am NOT breaking up with my girlfriend! I wouldn't even think about it. She loves me and she knows whats going on, she will be there to help me 100 per cent of the way and she has been since the start, the last thing either of us wants is a break up because it will make me fell worse - tenfold and she will be just as bad. I appreciate the advice, but next time take a closer look at what i am saying.

And no i am not exaggerating my problems, for 17 I'm a lot more intelligent than most of you would think. If i had the time to talk you through the past 17 years I'm sure most of your problems would seem like a walk in the park

Thanks you syllylou77, I've always said it could be bipolar disorder!

Answer 1

Sounds like you need some serious counseling and meds. There are a whole host of problems it could be. Possibly bipolar with borderline traits.

You have a lot of things going on in your head. The right meds could help with the chemical imbalance that causes it. But you need counseling to sort through it all.

A friend of mine had bipolar & refused meds. During one of his episodes he lost it over something minor and really hurt a girl bad. One he normally cared for. He was put in jail and tried to kill himself. He went to court and was committed to an institution for a couple of months. While in there they got him on the right meds and with continued counseling he did much better. So much better he thought he didn't need the meds anymore and went off them. A few weeks later he killed himself and his girlfriend.

I personally know God is the full answer but sometimes he gives that answer to docs in the form of understanding and meds. It's caused by a chemical imbalance. Not because you are a sinner or cursed. If it was that simple more would be healed that were saved and more mental illness than there already is for those who are sinners.

Unless you get some professional help it's only going to get worse short of a supernatural intervention and those don't happen to one just because they want it anymore than everyone sick prays and gets healed. Most of the time you need a professional.

Answer 2

Well i am no psychologist but i went to school with a guy who sounds a lot like you and the worst thing he did was to start on medicine. Whatever your problem with the other guy it is best not to start violence as that dose make things worse, can you not direct your aggression in other areas like taking up a sport or something? As to your girlfriend if she has been with you for 8 months she obviously likes you so why can you not just tell her what your feelings are and be honest? You obviously have issues but at only 17 you do not want to mess up the rest of your life by making bad choices now. And yes i know all about that when your 17 and you think you have huge problems you will look back when your 30 or 40 and laugh at how life was so simple then trust me. Just try to keep it together.

Answer 3

OK, I get what you are saying.
Now, in the first 2 minutes of your next therapy session,
this is the very thing you NEED TO SAY TO YOUR THERAPIST.
This is what is real and is heavy on your mind. So you will need
to come to plan what you will do about the situation.

Consider these things:
1) you have to take care of yourself before you can adequately care for any one else. Your load is full right now.
When you are well you will then be able to participate in relationships, and do it well.
2) asking a girl to limit herself to a relationship you can't fully participate in over the next year would be unfair to her.
3) during intense therapy you will be visiting many emotions and learning new and more effective approaches to life. This can be a very unhealthy environment for a young relationship.
Also unfair to her. You'll be a different guy in a year, and all the emotion is really confusing for her, as well as you.
4) giving each other some time and some space can be the kindest and most unselfish thing you can do for your time of healing.
5) better relationship will be possible once you've gained your health.....why start off by ruining it with negative?
6) so, tell her it's because you DO care about her and don't want to hurt her feelings while you are not well...that you want to wait till later to begin your relationship. Just be friends for now.

Answer 4

Talk to your psychologist and find out if there is a diagnosis for what is wrong. Keep talking and keep working on your problems with your psychologist and consider group counseling also if you or your psychologist thinks that it will help. Reading up on your condition (when the doctors decide) may help you. The Internet is very valuable and will teach you about your illness so that you will know what to expect. Always ask your doctor questions and if they are not answered, you always have the right to find a new doctor who will answer your questions and treat you with the respect you deserve. Try to make sure that you have a psychiatrist to prescribe any medications that you may need because that is their specialty and general practitioners do not have the same level of knowledge of psychiatric medication that psychiatrists have. Read, read, read and do plenty of research. Education is the main goal here to help you communicate effectively with your doctors so that they can help you to work hard and get better.

Yes, you are right! Many people are ignorant about mental illness or too stupid to learn about it. Your true friends will take the time to learn along with you, maybe your girlfriend can help you.

Answer 5

It could be a bipolar or borderline personality issue. If you are working with a psychologist and you are not getting anywhere, ask them to refer you to a local counselling group. People who are sectioned have group counselling for a good reason, it brings out issues which can isolate your problem and the group monitor can then help you get better with the help of your psychologist. If you continue to have problems and seem to be getting worse see a psychiatrist, you may need a short course of medications to help with the counselling. Don't worry about the other guy or your girl friend, these things will work out as you resolve your issues.

Answer 6

I have had problems with depression, anger, anxiety, and so on since I was a teen and after doctors put me on various medicines over the years, I discovered that the only thing that makes me feel more 'normal' is a vitamin B complex. It seems many people don't get enough in their diets and I am one of them. Not getting enough of the various Bs can make you seem nutty. Some people even seem to become violently insane if they don't get enough of the vitamin Bs.

Although a vitamin B complex helped me, I found out that also taking chlorella capsules with the B complex helped me even more. I tried taking each separately for a time as an experiment and I found out that I do better taking both at the same time.

A vitamin B complex may not work for you, but it sure has helped me.

Answer 7

I think you may have answered a large part of your own question when you added,"If I could talk to you..my life has been no walk in the park". or something to that effect. We are what we see. By age 5 we have developed traits that steer our behaviour for the rest of our lives. So if you had traumatic experiences in the past, of course they will affect your perception of the world and your behaviour.

Get yourself to your Psychologist and ask to be tested. A chemical imbalance can make your life hell, just as unresolved issues from your past. Don't suffer another day, friend, insist on help.

Answer 8

Much of this I don't know about, but I would say that to give yourself the very best chance, don't forget the old adage about 'a man is what he eats'. I don't want to put you off reading this by sounding too 'preachy'. Have a look at your diet, lots of fresh things? Stress will unbalance your nutrients. My ex husband suffered similar things and eventually improved after about 9 months on a healthy diet. I would suggest:
Keeping a record of food/drink and see if there is a pattern to your anger (in case of allergies - on tv I once saw someone smash a table after eating some potato)
Going to your GP and explaining, asking for a full blood count, checking your levels of iron, B12 and to check your liver function and anything else he thinks is relevant.
Consider supplementation with 5HTP (see link)
There is also a link to the Institute of Optimal Nutrition, who do work in this area, I imagine it is expensive to see them, but see if you can find out any useful information. I just want you to see that part of this could be your diet (not necessarily that you eat 'badly' but that it may not be 'right for you'). The site has a list of people you could consult
I really wish you luck with this
PS The supplements can be bought in most shops, not just from his site, its just he describes them well

Answer 9

This sounds like as if you have a split personality or something because from reading what you wrote it seems like your jumping to one personality to another. If your psychologist doesn't really seem to help you on your problems, get a new one. Because to tell you the truth some psychologists are just plain dumb because they usually don't really care lol So yea, don't dump your girlfriend and you DO LOVE HER. She's pretty much the best damn thing that ever happened to you especially supporting you during these tough times due to your complications? If i were a boy like you i would never let her go and not make her feel like shes the blaim.

I hope your going to be alright and get back to school. Take care and be safe.

Answer 10

many years ago I worked as a mental health advocate and was partnered with a young man with similar problems as you he had a bipolar disorder and with out medication could sometimes be unpredictable, is there a mind organisation near you that you could go to and see if there is someone to help fight with you to get this problem sorted, the people there are all volunteers and will go with you to appointments to help and support you with your problem, sometimes people just see young people with this sort as just con fussed and put it down to hormones and their age, sweetie I feel for you at this difficult time and someone needs to be with you and fighting for your mental well being, these feelings must be tearing you apart and if it is a bipolar disorder then all the advice in the world will not control these aggressive outbursts or your feelings of depression and suicidal thoughts, if I could take your pain away I would, I hope with all my heart that someone helps you out and wish you the very best of luck getting a diagnosis, you deserve a normal life and I hope you get it soon. good luck honey.