ok, my aunt and uncle on my stepdads side got a divorce. that may not seem that bad, but they were like my second parents. my mom and stepdad are usually busy with work. and my aunt and uncle were the ones who took me to do fun stuff, gave me advice about growing up. my uncle especially. (hes 28) he didnt treat me like the avarage teenager. he understood that i wasnt like every other girl who cared about hollister or boyfriends, or popularity. (no offense to girls who do, its just not me). and we LOVED listening to old greenday together. he taught me a couple of their songs on guitar and everything. and now that they are divorced, i dont get to see him anymore. only my aunt. it really hurts my feelings becuase whenever i listen to my greenday cd i start crying and wishing that i could go back in time. i know it sounds sappy but whatever. i really miss seeing his band in concert and hanging out.
what can i do to get over it or to at least comfort myself?
2007-09-09 15:00:17 · 6 answers · asked by ? 4 in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
i cant talk to anyone in my family about it cuz they all supported the divorce and my friends dont really care about it
2007-09-09 15:00:54 · update #1
its not the guitar playing i need help in. i'd give up everything about guitars if i could just hang out with him again. and i cant see him. everyone in the family has completely erased his existance in their life. if his name is mentioned, i'd probably get disowned by the family.
2007-09-09 15:12:55 · update #2
Just because your family decided to erase your uncle from your life doesn't mean you have to do it too.
I had an aunt that I always loved. She was the best and treated me like no other relatives when I was a teenager (or even younger)...One day my uncle divorced her. My family decided to side with him. Without getting into the politics of it, I chose not too. I loved her the same and I missed her. Twenty years later, she is still my aunt. And I still like her and remember her fondly .
Maybe, you don't know why your family wrote him off. But it still hurts and there is a whole in your life. Ask your parents if you can still have a friendship. They might not understand but they might.
How often do you make family? Comfort yourself knowing that family is thicker than marriage and it is thicker than blood. Smile everytime you think of him. ....and consider that you see his better qualities.
2007-09-09 15:40:18 · answer #1 · answered by kishoti 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
When people you love get a divorce it can really affect some of the members in the family. Speak to your uncle about teaching you how to play the guitar. In fact maybe your parents can pays for lessons. This will give you the chance to understand an instrument and be with your uncle as well.
Let your uncle how your appreciate his advice and friendship. I think he will be delighted to know that he made a positive difference in your life. You have a nice head on your beautiful shoulders and he needs to know that he lifted your heart...God bless
2007-09-09 15:20:57 · answer #2 · answered by tony 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
See if you can get your uncle's new contact information so you can stay in touch. He is probably hip-deep in trying to get himself reestablished in a new living space. Divorces are tough that way. Maybe you and he can go shopping to outfit his new place.
Other than that, about all you can do is try to comfort and support both the aunt and uncle.
See if you can get into some tutoring for your music, either through school or at a local guitar store, or maybe even through a meetup group.
2007-09-09 15:10:47 · answer #3 · answered by revsuzanne 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
A divorce doesn't mean you have to stop contact with your uncle. Write him letters and if your parents approve you can call him. It is tough when things like that happen. If this is impossible, write in a journal. You can tell a journal anything and not have to worry about it telling you that it is wrong to feel a certain way. Talk to your parents and tell them how you feel. You aren't required to stop loving someone just because someone else does. Don't argue. Just state that it is hard for you and would like to have the opportunity to call or write. This way you don't lose that connection and they don't have to see him. I hope this helps and I hope your family understands.
2007-09-09 15:13:58 · answer #4 · answered by debepta 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Gee Hon, thats too bad,maybe you should let your family know how important it is to you that you are able to continue a relationship with him, can you call him and talk to him or write to him so you can just keep in touch? Your aunt of all people should realize how close you were with him and know that it's not fair to you to act like he never existed. Good Luck to you and like i said i don't know if you are able to contact him, but tell your family how much he meant to you and that you would still like to see him once in awhile it doesn't mean they have to deal with him too.
2007-09-09 15:12:41 · answer #5 · answered by Debbie 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
it's great that you got along with someone other than your friends. Now you must understand you wont see him anymore but don't worry because you're young and you will meet a lot of people who will be your friends.
2007-09-09 15:18:33 · answer #6 · answered by SORA 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋