Quite frankly, I am having a hard time seeing a reason to do these things. Women never seem to appreciate having a door opened for them or a guy doing anything nice for them. They usually just shrug it off and then proceed to lump me in the same category with the a$$hole men (who never seem to be lacking female attention).
So am I justified in these feelings, or am I just feeling crabby and disgruntled for no real reason?
2007-09-09 08:44:03 · 15 answers · asked by Anonymous in Society & Culture ➔ Etiquette
Let me change the second sentence to say that they ALMOST never appreciate it.
2007-09-09 08:44:53 · update #1
Some people just have no manners. You may be unintentionally generalizing based on a few bad experiences. Then again, it may also be the area in which you live.
The women who say bad things about men are never going to change---generally speaking. Their house could be burning down, and a man could single-handedly save them, their children, and their cat from the blaze, and they would still email a male-bashing joke to all their friends the next day. They're just set in their ways, and not very intelligent. Intelligent, educated women judge people as individuals, which is what all educated, intelligent people do.
2007-09-09 08:52:33 · answer #1 · answered by I'm Still Here 5 · 3⤊ 0⤋
When I first began dating my husband I almost dumped him because he didn't open my car door. I thought it was just rude when he left me standing alone in the parking lot waiting for him to get in first and unlock my door. I'm a little woman and it means a lot to be when my big, strong man takes measures to make sure I'm safe. I decided not to dump him, though. Instead I told him how I felt, and it made perfect sense to him. Now he always opens my door for me, and I love it.
Really, it's not as if it's hard to be a gentleman. If some girl doesn't appreciate your efforts then what did it cost you? A few seconds? Go ahead and do it. The girl of your dreams might be out there right now, searching for a man who still knows how to treat a lady.
2007-09-09 16:40:20 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
There are those that appreciate you, I do. Keep being nice as it will come back to you when you need it. I know that older people appreciate it alot. You may be wanting to impress women your age, but it is so much different than it use to be. Most people it seems now a days, don't care as much for one another. This is so sad. Just be yourself, if you want to be nice, be nice, and don't feel bad if you don't get a thank you. You are going to find a great lady who appreciates you and your kindness.
2007-09-09 16:52:39 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
My son has been feeling the same way. The other day he held a door for a woman and instead of a thanks or something she said
"What? does it look like my arms are broke?"
What a terrible thing for that old witch to say.
Anyway don't give up it is wonderful to see some real men out there, and the real ladies really appreciate it. As for the rest, I guess you just need to ignore them (and maybe karma won't ;o)
2007-09-09 16:50:32 · answer #4 · answered by froghugger 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Maybe you're having a bad day, maybe the people you open doors for are having a bad day. Then, too, it seems to me that good manners are practically extinct. I'm kinda old, and I don't expect any Boy Scouts to help me cross the street, but it is so nice to have a gentleman hold a door open, or offer their seat on the bus. Please don't stop. You're setting a great example for onlookers, even if the recipients of your courtesy don't acknowledge your chivalry.
2007-09-09 15:53:20 · answer #5 · answered by alikij 4 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Chivalry is not really about being appreciated by others. It is about possessing good manners and behaving in an appropriate way. If you do things based on a wish to have others thank you or appreciate you, you will be disappointed over and over in life.
However, let me be the first to say that while not everyone will say thank you or appriciate your actions, being chivalrous WILL be noticed by the right sort of people. While a thousand women may not even ackowledge your chivalry, the one woman who will count most to you will.
best wishes
2007-09-09 15:58:28 · answer #6 · answered by TelulahB 3 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Keep up the good work, and eventually you WILL meet the kind of woman who appreciates you for the rare treasure that you are, and what's great about that is, SHE will be just the kind of real LADY that you will be glad to have in your life.
You are justified in your feelings, and I understand your frustration. You have just been dating a lot of STUPID women, friend!
2007-09-09 15:49:01 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 3⤊ 0⤋
I don't know where you live, but where I live we always thank a gentleman for his efforts. It is greatly appreciated and a lovely thing to do. Don't change who you are for the worse, that doesn't make any sense at all. Keep practicing those good manners! Thank you very much!!
2007-09-09 15:48:02 · answer #8 · answered by gma 7 · 4⤊ 0⤋
aww i think thats cute dont stop just because some girls dont appreciate it. every man is an asshole it just depends on how much. so the girls that make a list can shove it up their *** seriously they wont ever be happy. pay more attention to the girls that do appreciate it maybe??
2007-09-09 15:53:43 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 1⤋
DON'T EVER GIVE UP ON IT. It is so cool that you have stuck with it this long that maybe you can teach others to do so.
You have my support.
2007-09-09 16:05:55 · answer #10 · answered by Kat 3 · 2⤊ 0⤋