i want to help him and myself...but i dont know if i am strong enough, help pls?

Question

me and my bf have been together 4 years and about 2 years ago we got into cocaine, now its becoming a weekly thing! and i want it to stop! and he says he does too but i dont think hes strong enough as all the people we know are the same. i dont want mental problems! and i cant leave him to get sucked into this stupid lifestyle we drifted into. what can i do im worried and i tell myself everytime that its the last but it never is...

Answer 1

Watch Requiem for a Dream
this just might be a possible path you two will take
do you really want that
I don't

Answer 2

You say you want to stop- then you have to face some hard truth and really LOOK at yourself & what's going on.

You also have to leave the bf. No Lie.

I don't know how old you are, but I can tell you right now that the only reason you two are together is because you're coke buddies.

You can't know about anyone but yourself, and you really have to want to stop ruining your looks (believe me- by the time you're 30 or so there's no turning back) and making a fool of yourself...the only one who thinks nobody can tell is you.

I left the people and the whole lifestyle behind.
I took support where I could find it. HINT: if you go to AA
meetings either go to women's only, or stay away from the men. I went there alot in the beginning.

I started freebasing coke at about 21, with a guy I lived with.
I knew I had to leave him. I did. The one time he snivelled-
'oh, come back, i need you" and I fell for it the minute I got back he put a pile of drugs in front of me. LOSER.

I had other addictions after that but now take great comfort in how I live my life. It's been YEARS. I never say never, and I remember how low I've gone.

People with addiction problems will take down whoever is around them. Trust no one but yourself.

Leave Him...getting 'sucked in' makes it sound like you both didn't decide at some point to do coke. Which you did.
Every one has their own personal bottom- when they are sick, tired, and finally have had enough.
Your bf hasn't gotten near his yet- and you can do the leave & come back thing for as long as you want but you're only believing what you want to and not the fact, which is you need to go.

It's only going to get waaaay worse.
The most selfish people I've ever seen? Addicts, myself included.
They don't care who they take for a ride as long as they're getting thier needs met.
You have no idea how many pipes I broke, how many mornings the sun came up and I had that horrible coke hangover, no sleep, and the "never again" thing in my head.

Have you ever watched Intervention- I think it's on A&E.

Sit through a couple episodes of that, if you can.
Get out, get better, and start living the life you are meant to live: your own.

If I have come out of all I was into anyone can.

Answer 3

First guy who answered is right: totally see that movie. But how can you say that you are not strong enough? You have enough strength to realize that you, and admit, that you have a problem. Most addicts cannot recognize that and are stuck in the pool of denial. First, if both of you want out, you are going to jump at the same time. Not one or the other first, take each other's hands and make a leap of faith.

Go to rehab, be committed. Encourage each other to get better. Go to support groups. Get counseling. Do what you have to do to get better. If you fear that going into rehab together will create temptation to do it again, then go to separate rehab groups. You cannot help anyone else if you cannot help yourself!!! Remember that!

Answer 4

Seek help. There are usually drug counselling services in your local area, some are charitable others are run by the local health authority. They will probably tell you that if you want to live a drug free life you will have to give up your drug taking friends. that will probably include your boyfriend. Insist that your boyfriend goes with you. If he sees that you are serious it may be the impetus that he needs. You will probably find that when you stop taking drugs,that you have nothing in common with your current friends anyway. It's not going to be an easy thing to do, but I wish you all the luck in the world and hope that you are successful. You are already half way there as you have admitted that you want to stop.

Answer 5

been there!! There is a 12 step program called Narcotic Anominas(sp), they are a group of people with the desire to stop using drugs. They do not judge and they will help. It helped me and I am now drug free for 16 years. They have a 1-800 number in the phone book. They are world wide. They have people who can come and pick you up to take you to meetings. You might want to talk to your parents or another trusted adult. Good luck it is really hard to stop by yourself.Feel free to email if you need more help. [e-mail]

Answer 6

why not find a rehab placement that will keep you both together, there are some rehab centres that are live in and your allowed to be there with your partner,

its going to be hard and if you want to really stay with him then its going to take a lot of hard work. not just during the treatment but after too..

your going to need to watch out for relapses and what happens if one of you relapses and the other doesnt,,,

its all to easy for ppl to judge you and i really hope you are serious and try and get off the drugs,

ask your doctor about rehab placement that lets you stay together as a couple.

good luck xx

Answer 7

Its a shame that both of you got hooked on this vile stuff. You need to realise that loads of people can have fun without stuffing there nose with white powder.

If you want a clean break and your serious about it, then I'm afraid you will have to leave him. If you don't then you will continue to be sucked into that kind of lifestyle and will find it hard to get out of it.

Answer 8

i know what you are going through hun it's so easy to say never again..til next time when someone offers you a line and you can't resist!! you do need to get away from people around you doing it so much and cut off contact with your dealer..erase his number whatever! I wouldnt be too concerned about mental probs it's more pressure on your heart. someone i know had a heartattack from too much coke and he's only in his twenties..i've seen so many people loose evertying cos of that ****..tell your friends your not interested in it any more and tell them not to offer you any.. i totally empathise with you but try your hardest to stop..you don't need rehab it can be kicked if your strong, and your fellas gotta be strong too.xxGood luck hunny.xx

Answer 9

get away from the crowd that snorts immediately. You two cannot stop the habit and have the same "friends". Move to a different neighborhood, change jobs, whatever is necessary to cut ties with the drug crowd. If you are not willing to change friends, you are not serious about quitting the habit.

good luck

Answer 10

i watched them take the lovely irish girl up the road from me. the sight of her being removed from the flat in a body bag at 3.30 in the morning was some thing i dont ever want to see again. her boyfriend sitting in the police car out of he's head' he didnt even know she was dead. we all loved her to bits. she used to knock on the door to borrow some tin foil with an excusse that she was cooking. allways staggering around in one state or the outher, (you know what i meen) Ilene her name was. beautifull RAVEN black hair. the smile of an angel. she was pregnant too. she was on methadone , but it just wasnt enough to do it for her. over 6 months she just seemed to get more and more desperate. some times one of us would take her in from the street after finding her sitting in the rain crying. i wish i could find a way to show the two of you the sadness of it all. the only way is to bond tight together and remove yourselves from the area and friends you have. please do it. dont end up like Ilene.