My wife and my colleague?

Question

I am married for 5 years with a very attractive wife. I have a very close friend at the office with whom I confide my personal life. He is very experienced with women and advises me how to handle issues I have with my wife. But lately I have started telling him very intimate things about my relationship with my wife and he seems to take particular interest in knowing more about her. The thing is I have also taken a liking in telling him these things and often look forward to meeting him during office hours to tell him these details. I have invited him to join my wife for lunch on 2 occasions and it gives a ver exciting feeling seeing both of them together interacting. Can anybody shed some light on why I feel and act this way?

Answer 1

I suppose this is fine, if your goal is to have this guy sleep with your wife. Is that what you want???? Pal, you are starting something that is impossible to control, and usually fatal to a marriage. Decide IF cheap thrills and fantasies are worth your marriage.

Answer 2

Are you trying to shift your current relationship towards a love triangle?
Are you bi?
You seem to have an unhealthy interest in the guy? I mean, have you been fantasising about watching someone making love to your wife?
This seems quite heavy. Does your wife have any idea that this guy knows more than he should about her and her private business?
What if she feels attracted to him, but in a healthier way than what you have set up to happen?
What if he is equally attracted to her and they both fall in love and leave you?
Well, you seem to be playing a very dangerous game, and the worse is that you are manipulating two people, even possibly one who is the one you're supposed to cherish, love and protect.
I think that you should just stop telling this guy your business and try and sort any issues with your wife or a marriage counsellor.
No offense, but you sound a little bit insane or creepy.

Answer 3

Ever hear of voyeurism? How would your wife feel if she knew that you were confiding intimate details of the relationship to this person?

As to why... hmmm. Armchair psychology says you are getting your jollies off relating your activities to begin with, and now you have added the dimension of observing the interaction between an individual who knows intimate details of your relationship with your wife and the woman in question. You state that your wife is attractive, but you seem to feel the need to show off your relationship and your wife. Seems a a bit perverse and more than a bit of an insecurity issue on your part to me. Perhaps a shift toward enjoying your relationship with your wife and respecting her privacy is in order?

Answer 4

Ok first, what your doing is invading your wifes privacy, and I hope you confronted her before hand.

Your friend is obviously getting arroussed by hearing stories of your wife.

And you are obviously getting arroused by the fact that sharing these details makes him arroused. (not in a homesexual way or anything, its like when you know someone else is getting horny, it makes you horny).

And by your friend meeting your wife, your letting him fill part of his fantasy (maybe fantasy is an extreme, but I mean hes obviously picturing your wife, and seeing her is adding to it). And I am guessing your wife doesnt know that you share these details, in which case its adding to the risk or secretive and supsention of this whole situation. And thats what is making you feel so excited.

However, I really think you should share this with your wife.

Answer 5

So I'm assuming that you like talking to him because you feel that you can confide everything to him about your wife and you? And you're interested to see them both interacting with each other? Maybe it's the thought of seeing someone (your colleague) you've been telling everything to talk to the one who has been talked about the whole time because you want to know what might happen. Or maybe you're just interested in human behavior, sort of sounds like something a sociologist would want to know about....

Answer 6

Do no longer something. that's going to all come out interior the top and you do no longer choose for to be a ingredient of it. NUnless your boss owns the employer then he will have a md someplace and it will get found out (particularly in case you detect some way of leaking it anonymously!) you're able to de-hyperlink your loss of pay rises with this - so, are you going to farm your spouse out to the boss so which you would be able to get a payrise? concept no longer. that's a scenario the place the single with the pay is unquestionably the unlucky one. that's that your colleague substitute into biting his tongue while the boss positioned his arm round her waist - just to maintain his occupation. that's that they are swingers! you will in no way understand. the only difficulty you are able to understand is you do no longer choose for to be a piece of it. in case you pick for extra money or a extra efficient activity or merchandising then pass and artwork somwhere else. in case you pick for to play that activity be arranged to lose your activity.

Answer 7

Ten to one you have had dreams of the three of you being sexually involved or at least fantasized about it. The reason being is that you love your wife and have a close relationship with your colleague. Meaning you are friends. You can confide in him. You want to share more with him---BUT DON'T. Leave it a fantasy or dream which ever you want to call it.
I hope this helps you.

Answer 8

I have a on line friend who did what you're
doing. Between the two Men, his wife liked
his friend more. She moved in with him.
Are you ready to risk your Marriage?
Talking about your Spouse may make
someone else want what you have.
One reason you don't talk about intimate
things in your relationship with others.
Find a Hobby.

Answer 9

People love fantasies right now your wondering what it would be like for him to do her in front of you am I right?

Well you need to quit it .

A.she mightnt want to be with another man.

B. she's not your personal sex slave to hire out to anyone you wish .

C. why on earth did you marry her because you obviously dont love her and have little or no respect for her.

Do yourself a favour and keep the fantasy just that as a fantasy either that or go hire a good lawyer now because its going to cost you big time in the end .

Answer 10

Well, I wouldn't look to much into it if you are thinking your wife is being unfaithful with this guy or anything. I have some really close friends who are very interested in my personal life and every single detail in my relationships. It makes me happy when the people I am dating have fun with my best friends. Maybe you are just glad that one of your good friends who you trust and confide is gets along with your wife. If gives you something in common. Hope this helps!