How is suicide not selfish? (I hope you don't mind delicate♥)?

Question

deliacte asked whether or not suicide was selfish, and here was my answer: 'Yes.

Especially if you're close to your family and all that. Someone who cared about anyone but themselves would "be strong for the people in their lives" and all that crap they say on Touched By An Angel.

Other people need you in their lives, and you're just going to leave because you've decided that nobody can help you? Suicide is weak, and someone who was'nt weak would keep searching for a reason to live.

I've felt pretty down before, but I know that life can always get better. And i've been in some pretty low places. Disease, death, abuse, all of it. '

Is part of your life not the effect you have or being there for others? It's like a job interview. You are given the chance to show how great and eligible you are to make something of yourself, and if you don't show up, you've let others down, you've shown that you're not really worth waiting around for.

That's just what I believe.

I'm sorry if i've offended you, LS. I feel like such a douche now...a friend of mine killed herself. She shut herself out from the world the year before she did it. So nobody knows why. I guess that's just my situation effecting my opinion, then.

Answer 1

if is very selfish and a coward way to get out of a bad situation.

Answer 2

Thats a very difficult question. I totally disagree with people who have said that suicide is cowardly or an easy way out. A lot of people who commit suicide don't actually want to die, they just want a solution to their problems but feel that their is no way out. I am not suicidal, and therefore cannot even begin to comprehend what motivates a person to take their own life, so I will not try to. But what I do know is this- people generally don't kill themselves to spite their family. Perhaps they genuinely believe that everyone would be better off without them, so in their mind they are carrying out an unselfish act. However, there are those who give up too easily and do not have enough faith in the support of their family and friends. In this case, it is selfish as they have chosen to inflict grief rather than look for an answer to what may be a simple problem.

Answer 3

Suicide isn't selfish... No, what it really is is more often than not a result of mental illness and in some cases a terrible life.

On multiple occasions I have contemplated suicide. From the age of 5-13 I was called a no good mutt and I was tormented for my ancestry. I grew up in a small community that would often spit at me and find it okay to shove me around and on occasion beat on me. Of course they were careful to keep it away from my mom and I never once went to her in fear of what they'd do to her. For me and others from situations not all that different from mine there was no chance of a better day.

Just because you don't know the reason behind some one killing themselves doesn't mean that there wasn't a very good reason that they felt that suicide was they're only option.

Answer 4

Well, speaking as a person who has actually attempted it... twice... and almost succeded once... I have to say that I'm somewhat offended. Actually, very.

When you feel that way, you believe that nothing is going to get better no matter what. People say, "tomorrow will be better"... bull....****! Life DOESN'T always get better. And to make it better, you have to work at it... but when you're THAT low and in such a dark place, you don't have the strengh to do it. When people hear "don't have the strengh", people equate that to "weak"... as you have.

And when you're that depressed, you can't be there for people and very few people know how to be there for you, because they don't understand. NO ONE understands unless you've been there and done it. And too many people claim to understand because they've "been in some pretty low places."

I tried twice, and if the people around me felt the same way you do, then I would have made sure to succed. I wouldn't want to live around someone that made me feel weak and not worth it. So I guess feeling that way makes me weak?

Answer 5

I don't see suicide in terms of it being selfish or not. It is not the best solution, but who am I to judge?

Suicide is weak? That is not the best way to put it.

I've been there myself. Attempted once even. And I have to say that when I realized what I would have done to my loved ones if I had succeeded, I felt very guilty. But in my defense, I was just not in a good place at the time and was very confused and under a lot of mental strain. I also have a couple of mental illnesses which add to this. Don't tell me you are one of those people who think that depression is all in the head?

It is easy to judge when you are on the outside, but you just never know what the person was going through.

I am living not just to spare my loved ones the pain of losing me to suicide, but for myself. I owe myself a chance to attempt to live a full and happy life. And that is what I am trying to do.

Answer 6

Hi Natalie, yes what you say is "All true", problem is:_ "IF" someone is suffering from bad depression- ( which you obviously would be to contemplate suicide )
then- its very hard to think of other people-
and you think they dont care anyway-
its like "Tunnel vision" you can only see 1 thing- and thats all the bad in your life- just all mixed up together- you cant seem to seperate- 1 bad thing that happened at say----" 6 "year old- (just for a figure) - from stuff that happened yesterday, its hard for someone who has Never suffered from "Depression" - to understand, really- it is just "all consuming" and takes over your whole life- "yes" there is treatment, but most take a long time to work- and people are not very supportive- When you are down- the negative vibes stop people wanting to be with you- thus reinforcing the thoughts that "No one cares"- I wish I had a pound for every person i have ever heard say "Just pull yourself together" to someone, who is suffering depression, people dont understand its a real illness- because there is ."No rash" or outward scars. Yes- I tried to take my own life- yes- life has got better- but at "The time" I did not feel it would. I badly damaged my heart- with overdose medication- and now will die early- with "No choice". Please anyone out there- "Seek Help"- and thankyou natalie- for caring- love Jo xx

Answer 7

First; this is a serious and delicate topic and for anyone reading they should know there is always help even if you believe in your mind and heart that there is not.
Every life is important and everyone suffers to different degrees and with different circumstances surrounding them. Everyone feels hopeless and completely alone at times and it is then that they need to know there are people who care about their life and their well being and they need to dig deep inside and find the strength through a friend, a family member, a stranger, a Doctor, also sometimes getting out of your surroundings can change the entire way you feel; it could be a simple walk, a drive, hotline numbers. You can and will get relief from this feeling.

From knowing more than one person who has reached out to another and they are here and alive and living the life they were meant to live.
They are Living Proof that this overwhelming feeling of total hopelessness, emptiness, darknesss, pain and despair is only temporary and will eventually pass by perserverance and reaching out to anyone. You will not be thought of as anything other than a "human being" suffering like we all suffer. Someone will help you and hear you.
IT IS TEMPORARY AND WILL PASS; PLEASE KNOW THIS AND BELIEVE THIS.
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PLEASE SHOW RESPECT AND HAVE COMPASSION FOR THOSE AND THEIR FAMILIES.
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Answer 8

My brother killed himself last month. He was the most unselfish person I know. I can only think that he had a complete break with reality and shot himself. His wife was cheating on him and apparently was leaving him for another man. He would have been OK even if they had gotten divorced. I don't know if he planned this or just had a breakdown. I just cannot think of him as selfish because he was so giving usually. The last time I talked to him before he killed himself, he asked if my vehicle was running OK and said that he would check the oil the next time I was over there.

I don't know what to believe.

Answer 9

It is a serious subject. One of my distant cousin committed suicide over a breakup. She was a very popular athlete and a senior in college. It is very sad. I think teens don't realize the hurt suicide has on the family and friends.

Answer 10

Actually people are suicidal when they have no one to turn to when their life is going on a turbulent phase.Humans are interdependent beings,social beings that depend on each other for support.People who commit suicide are probably thinking "my life is so screwed up and there's nothing I can do anymore to fix it so I'll jsut end it".That thought just says it all,unwilling to face life's challenges and obstacles,no matter how dire a situation is suicide is wrong,the right to life is a privilege not something you can throw away.Suicide is not just selfish but mostly cowardly in nature,people think that they cant do it,think that they cant solve their problems may it be social,financial or emotional that person is just thinking about himself and not wanting to face the consequnces nor predicament he/she is currently in without regard for the feelings or emotions of others and when people commit suicide they think that nobody cares for them anymore,can you believe that?some may strongly believe so but their vision and perception of what is around them is impaired because of all the negative thoughts consuming them.

Answer 11

no, i don't mind. like i stated in my details of my question, i don't believe suicide is selfish. i'll admit that i have tried to commit suicide a few times. i just got to a point where i felt helpless. that i wasn't good enough for the world or myself. that i would only cause my family and friends more pain by living. i have a very different point of view from you. i completely understand what you are saying. i haven't lost any of my immediate family members due to suicide. frankly, i would probably have a different perspective on this topic.