I know women cheat too but this is focused on my father. He has no respect for my mom every morning he gets up and calls the other women and ever afternoon when he comes home from work he gives her a call b4 anything else. She use to do the "call and hangup thing" but now he just calls her. My mom is not well of financially right now or else she would leave but u can see that the marriage is over and she has confronted him about the women but he denies it. But we're not stupid my sister and I are in our early 20's and I have heard him talk to her on the phone the way he should be talking to my mom. He wonders why I don't have any respect for him and why I always try to avoid him. I wish we were well of financially so we could all move out he doesn't know how sick he makes me. The strange thing is I over hear him telling the other omen about us, things like our majors in school, jobs, hobbies, etc. And if we were to confront him about it he would probably say she just a friend.
2007-09-08 11:32:30 · 12 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
How can someone live like this. I recently moved 2 another state but unfortunately eneded up moving back home to live in this hell hole. The other thing I can't stand is that he's always questioning me, my mom and my sister about where we're going but he's the one cheating. He also has a bad temper we cant tell him anything. I can't wait until I have enough money to move out and tell him about himself.
2007-09-08 11:35:46 · update #1
Maybe your dad needs a wake-up call. The next time he asks you what's wrong, respond with "do you really want to know?" If he says yes, then tell him how you feel. Don't get emotional or angry (it will be hard), but say look, I know this is going on. I think it shows a great deal of disrespect for mom, for us and for the vows of marriage. I can't respect you because of this behavior. If I had the money to support mom alone, I'd take her and you'd be left with your harlot. Just remember, if she'll cheat with you, she'll cheat on you.
You obviously have no respect for him, so why not tell him what you think?
2007-09-08 11:41:53 · answer #1 · answered by Wendy 3 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Your mother does have a real option here if she wants to take it. She can file for divorce based on infidelity and se his sorry a.s for everything she is legally entitled to thus putting him in a financial pinch which by the way, aman with no money usually turns off most women. That should end his girlfriend too and then he will only have himself. Your mom will probably get spousal support from him and anything else she wants. Your mom willprobably need to get a protective restraining order against him due to his anger problem and she needs to notify the police if he threatens her. She can contact a local womans help group for help getting away from him too. She doesnt need to live like this nowadays. Good luck
2007-09-08 11:45:02 · answer #2 · answered by Arthur W 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
If you know you'r father is cheating then have you tried to tell you'r mother about it? If not do so. If she know's then the next time you hear him talking on the phone you should walk in & ask him who he's talking to, And if he say's "Just a friend", Or anything like that then when you get a chance take his phone hit redial and if he take's it w/ him aftward's then look at the number's punched in his phone & call the person back if they pick ask "who this is" and when or if she tell's you just tell her that you know shes in a relationship w/ you'r father and if none of this seem's to work out then you should just tell you'r father you over heard him talking on the phon sayin "i love you" to the woman & that you know hes cheating on your mother & has a father just tell him how you feel about it & ask why hes doing it.
2007-09-15 11:51:56 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I hope for your Mothers' sake there is a way out of this situation, but it sounds like your mother is used to this kind of treatment. If you and your sister are in your early 20's is there any way that you can make arrangements to get away from this situation by getting a place for you, your sister, and your Mother? Then, let her file for a separation and let her make up her own mind. Perhaps this is how this man has been all of their married life and she has given up on trying to get away from it because she has no respect for herself. Poor woman. I would tell your father that all of you know what is going on with this other woman. Sounds like she is getting a lot out of the arrangement, so your father is already paying his way with her - plus she is fantasizing that you are her children by his updates on personal family happenings. I am so sorry for you - and especially for your mother.
2007-09-14 22:54:19 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Queen, one thing you have to remember... people usually do what they are taught to do, by their own parents. Somehow, he seem to think that it is ok to be disrespectful. Your mom will have money if she get him for alimony. As long as she sit there and take it, he's going to do it. as long as you and your sister don't check him, he's gonna keep on doing it. The reason he try to keep up with you all is... because his conscience is getting the best of him. The thing with dealing with a person like him is... you can't ask him anything, because they Deny and lie. You have to let him know that you know. Like this. If you ask him did he go to the store? He will lie about it. You have to say it like this... When you went to the store.... You can not give them the room to lie. Shoot from the hip. When and if you leave again, take your mom with you. This have got to be a load on her self esteem. I know that she is hurt and hopefully, she is not blaming herself for his stupidity.
2007-09-14 15:23:26 · answer #5 · answered by Go GO Ressa 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
This is very disrespectful to your mom and i know that it hurts you very badly. she has asked him about the other woman but he denies it how could he when he is on the phone all the time talking to her. so you and your father now have a distance relationship. You see this happens when woman relie on their spouse to become the bread winner have no nest egg for them selves hope you learn by this and dont make the same mistake. see you are on the outside looking in you dont know what happen in your parents relationship to make your father behave this way and you are gonna protect your mother no matter what.
Best of luck
2007-09-08 19:06:55 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
You can only control what you do - not what he does.
Take your mom and sister and get out. If your mom files for divorce she will also need some therapy. Obviously he is mentally abusing all of you with his actions.
It is not easy to do, but it will help your mom, and actually free your Dad to move on.
2007-09-15 02:15:35 · answer #7 · answered by Maggie Jeans 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
he is a bloddy mother******.sweety just ignore him untill you people are financialy strong. do not give him any ****.just live your life. make him understant that he doesnt deserve to be a father and a husband. tell your mom to do the same.if u are felling so bad then can u realise how your mother feels???? i am sure she is dieing every second inside. she needs you and your sister.try to be strong, atleast for the sake of your mother. God is there. sooner or later he have to pay his faults.
2007-09-08 11:47:14 · answer #8 · answered by sherry 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
You, your mom and your sister need to pull together, get out of there and get a place that you can all 3 share.
Leave his A$$ behind.
2007-09-13 05:58:01 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Your father is sharing intimate details of his life with this other lady. Sounds to me like he loves her and older people are less likely to get divorced, they feel obligated to stay together for their families.
Talk to you father, but all so listen when he speaks.
2007-09-13 07:25:10 · answer #10 · answered by Melissa S 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋