I read somewhere that touching and hugging and stroking might have benefits for wellbeing. You see a lot of girls being affectionate with their girlfriends. Yet today among all guys there doesn't seem to be much hugging or touching. Forget this homophobia - where is this human touch to male-male relationships? What's wrong with guys physically expressing their liking/ove for their other pals/buddies/mates?
PS: I have a French friend who likes stroking my hair, hugging and he sometimes caresses me in a non-sexual, friendly way. But because he is now studying in a different country he has become less affectionate and more impersonal. Where is all this sense of male-male friendships and love?
2007-09-07 22:59:44 · 9 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Friends
In one particular mining company in the UK, the guys there are so close and affectionate a team member would even pat his pal gently on the balls (non-sexual) as an expression of affection.
2007-09-08 16:35:31 · update #1
1. It depends on the culture one living in at the time.
2. It depends on the native cultures of the two men involved.
3. The touching tends to be quick or sort of rough and playful and is often associated with games of some sort. Example: men will slap each others behind during while participating in a sporting event.
4. It depends on the age of the men involved. As men age they become less homophobic.
5. Men who know each other for some time will increasingly allow the private space around them to shrink -- and are less likely to pull back from an accidental touch or brush from another male friend.
6. Sometimes it depends on the family history of the man doing the touching or the man on the receiving end of the touch. Example: Some men will touch another male's shoulder, lightly, as if saying, "Excuse me while I get by." Others will put one hand on the back of a male friend's neck and give a couple of light squeezes as if saying, "Everything will be alright."
7. It depends on where on his body a man is touched or kissed or caressed.
8. It depends on the context of the situation. Examples: funerals, hearing about the birth of a child, etc.
2007-09-08 05:30:27 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
I guess at least with the American population, a lot of people are still homophobic. If you go to Italy, straight men who are close friends greet each other with "kisses", if you know what I mean.... It's funny. I'm a 27 year old straight female and when I go shopping I like to hug my mom and people give us werid looks like we are lesbos or something. I just ignore it and if they really need clarification, I turn to them and tell them that the woman I'm hugging is my mom. Anyways, Americans are still not open-minded with these physical touching between people. It's good to have these bonds. So what if two gay guys or two lesbian hold hands or are affectionate in public. It's not like they are having sex or doing nasty things in public or in front of children....Hey, it's better to show positve affection towards each other, especially in a world of violence!
2007-09-16 02:59:50 · answer #2 · answered by Xine Olivia 3 · 2⤊ 0⤋
The American or Western civilization has customs all to our own. We don't 'approve' of males 'touching' or standing too close together, etc. That is our model of manhood. If you check with acceptable 'maleness' in other countries, you will find that they have different customs that are 'approved' for them.
It makes no difference, really. I'm sure you have seen other culture's men behave differently on the TV. Many walk elbow in elbow as women here in the US occasionally walk hand in hand. Many give a kiss in greeting. This may be called cultural body language. Either way, different cultures express themselves differently than here in the US. Other's customs may seem "weird" to us and our customs seem "weird" to them.
You may notice for example, 'western' people don't stand too close to each other when talking, but in some countries, the speakers stand very close to one another.
2007-09-08 07:45:23 · answer #3 · answered by caves51 4 · 0⤊ 1⤋
it's a sexist double standard that allows females to touch and hug while at the same time forcing men to hide their natural emotions and friendship expressions.. Much like th eproverbial bull that real men don;t cry. Fact is we have feeling too and we deserve to be allowed to show them as much as females do. And anyone who believes that two gusy hugging is gay had better also start labelling two gals who hug as lesbians lest they be found out to be harbouring sexual prejudices.
2007-09-08 16:09:10 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 3⤊ 1⤋
I'm all for it, myself! I don't mind guys or girls touching me. I think a lot of this comes from the individuals upbringing. My family wasn't a touchy feely family. It wasn't until I grew up and found my own that touch didn't become an issue for me anymore.
2007-09-08 06:07:58 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 1⤋
Im stationed in Germany and i see it a lot. Im not comfortable with that myself but hey if thats what you wanna do go for it, aint nothin wrong.
2007-09-08 06:09:49 · answer #6 · answered by Flying Spagetti Monster 7 · 0⤊ 1⤋
because touching is part of body language. girls are more into expressing themselves emotionally then guys. yes i agree different cultures are into different things aswell.. answer my question plz!!
2007-09-08 06:12:26 · answer #7 · answered by jaffacakesaresogood 3 · 0⤊ 2⤋
mmmm, got to think about this one.
2007-09-15 23:26:00 · answer #8 · answered by Eve 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Your French friend is homosexual.
2007-09-08 06:27:34 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 4⤋